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Some parents offer their school-age children money for each high grade (mark) they get in school. Do you think this is a good idea?

Essay topics: Some parents offer their school-age children money for each high grade (mark) they get in school. Do you think this is a good idea?

Wcj's picture

In contemporary society, much ink has been spilled on the topic that whether it is good for parents to use money to courage their school-aged children to gat good grades. Some claims that such behavior is quite acceptible. Such assertion, however, has been torn into pieces by others. As far as I am concerned, the statement that parents shall offer school-aged children for good grades' award is arbitrary and one-sided because it fails to take all related circumstance into consideration. We should analyze conprehensively before we draw the final conclusion.
There is no denying fact that couraging school-aged children getting good grades for money do have some beneficial aspects. For one reason, young as those children maybe, they have already recognized the significance of money, which means, for some premature children, it may be approprate to teach them how to manage and use money. Children can be beneficial from the process that learning the importance of money and will be good to their further developement. However, the advantages that awarding by money derives cannot be comparable to the advantages not by this way gains.
Firstly, there are several better ways to award children for their good grades. Some school-aged students have not recognized the advantages those money bring, which means a equally toy may be more alluring for them than money. Money, in the other word, cannot serve as a efficient tool to courage children. Take my little brother for example. He is a primary student who doesn't know what money means. As far as his concerned, money is just paper that can change into toy, while toy is what really attract him. Toy is direct and his brain isn't such mature that can figure out the relationship between money and toy. He will be more motivated by award him a toy rather than money and he did do better with a motivation of having a toy. In such way, awarding other kinds of thing do better than just award money.
Secondly, it is a quiet important lesson for children to learn the significance of money because once they have a worry impression of money which can become everything, the joy those changes bring may block their attention on the number, leading to children spend money without limitation. There is a survey done by reporters from Xinhua News Agency, showing that 80% of children who spend money without restriction lack a right impression of money and their parents did not pay much attention on it. 50% of those parents ignores the impact of money may bring and award their children money for their doing right thing. As we can draw from the survey above, awarding money serves as an key factors leading children to have a worry recognization of money.
In brief, based on the previous discussion, the issue that parents should spent money on courage their children for good grades is complex and needs a case by case analysis. We are not supposed to disregard those situations where the statement is unjustifiable. As a result, I cannot totally agree with the statement.

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Average: 7.3 (1 vote)
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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 141, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'this money' or 'those moneys', 'those monies'?
Suggestion: this money; those moneys; those monies
...ents have not recognized the advantages those money bring, which means a equally toy may be...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 172, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...vantages those money bring, which means a equally toy may be more alluring for th...
^
Line 3, column 270, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...ney, in the other word, cannot serve as a efficient tool to courage children. Tak...
^
Line 3, column 372, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: doesn't
...or example. He is a primary student who doesnt know what money means. As far as his co...
^^^^^^
Line 3, column 539, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: isn't
...ttract him. Toy is direct and his brain isnt such mature that can figure out the rel...
^^^^
Line 4, column 683, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'a' instead of 'an' if the following word doesn't start with a vowel sound, e.g. 'a sentence', 'a university'
Suggestion: a
... survey above, awarding money serves as an key factors leading children to have a ...
^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
first, firstly, however, if, may, really, second, secondly, so, while, for example, in brief, such as, as a result

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 22.0 15.1003584229 146% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 17.0 9.8082437276 173% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 13.8261648746 65% => OK
Relative clauses : 16.0 11.0286738351 145% => OK
Pronoun: 47.0 43.0788530466 109% => OK
Preposition: 54.0 52.1666666667 104% => OK
Nominalization: 16.0 8.0752688172 198% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2522.0 1977.66487455 128% => OK
No of words: 513.0 407.700716846 126% => OK
Chars per words: 4.91617933723 4.8611393121 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.75914943092 4.48103885553 106% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.64888971057 2.67179642975 99% => OK
Unique words: 241.0 212.727598566 113% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.469785575049 0.524837075471 90% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 779.4 618.680645161 126% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 9.59856630824 83% => OK
Article: 4.0 3.08781362007 130% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.51792114695 142% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.94265232975 81% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 25.0 20.6003584229 121% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 20.1344086022 99% => OK
Sentence length SD: 60.2813403965 48.9658058833 123% => OK
Chars per sentence: 100.88 100.406767564 100% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.52 20.6045352989 100% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.56 5.45110844103 84% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.53405017921 110% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 5.5376344086 108% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 16.0 11.8709677419 135% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.85842293907 104% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.88709677419 102% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.355939976555 0.236089414692 151% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.106116405815 0.076458572812 139% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0971832676529 0.0737576698707 132% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.219631528881 0.150856017488 146% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0693949959517 0.0645574589148 107% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.0 11.7677419355 102% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 59.64 58.1214874552 103% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 10.1575268817 97% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.26 10.9000537634 103% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.61 8.01818996416 95% => OK
difficult_words: 97.0 86.8835125448 112% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 10.002688172 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 10.0537634409 99% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 10.247311828 98% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.