No doubts that all parents always dream for the best for their children. They usually think about the best is related mainly to the best job that brings the most earnable salary. As a result they try to encourage their kids to get the highest grades they can. Many parents use money as a tool to do so. In their defense, they say that money works as a sword with two blades, it encourages the kids to study hard, at the same time, it teaches them that they have to work hard to earn money. Although I understand their point of view, I have a different opinion. I believe that money should do nothing relating to school grades because not all kids are there to get high grades and to avoid creating a greedy generation.
First of all, let’s agree that high school marks are not the most important thing in our kids' lives. We see many kids who are not achieving the highest scores in their school marks but they achieve them in other fields like sports, music, art or even acting. Pushing those little fellows so hard for studying by giving them money as a reward only if they get high grades, is a type of punishment to them rather than encouragement. Each child has his/her point of strength, that the important thing parents need to work on. Also sometimes school grades give false alarms, for example, the other day I read a story about a kid who went home from the school with a paper to hand to his mother. His mother read the letter, and the kid asked his mom, what is in there? She replied that the school telling her that he is so smart for them and it is better for him to be in another place. This was a lie from the mother, what was really written in the letter that this student mentality is so poor that the school can't accept him anymore. The mother encouraged her son and worked with him hard. At the end it turned out that this boy who kicked from the school for poor achieving is Albert Einstein the great scientist. From this story, we can get the conclusion that school grades are not the most important thing to be rewarded by money. Also not all the kids meant to be high graders, some are meant to be champion chips, other business owners and so on.
Second, if parents kept in rewarding their kids with money on every high mark they got, the only result will be a greedy generation, a generation that doesn't do anything for free. In other words, those kids will not help each other or help their communities because they will not get paid for this help. Those kids will not volunteer to do stuff because there will be nothing financially in return. A selfish generation will be there living among us and they will teach their kids the same thing, which will create unappreciating people in the future for the time infinity.
In conclusion, for the reasons I mentioned above, I encourage each parent to avoid using money as a rewarding tool a lot with the kids. At the same time, I like to put a reminder in the parents’ minds, that school grades are not more important than their kids themselves, so not use them to force your kids to study more or achieve better, there are hundreds of other ways to encourage the kids.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 180, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “As” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...b that brings the most earnable salary. As a result they try to encourage their ki...
^^
Line 2, column 528, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Also,
...mportant thing parents need to work on. Also sometimes school grades give false alar...
^^^^
Line 2, column 1012, Rule ID: CANT[1]
Message: Did you mean 'can't' or 'cannot'?
Suggestion: can't; cannot
...nt mentality is so poor that the school cant accept him anymore. The mother encourag...
^^^^
Line 2, column 1338, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Also,
...mportant thing to be rewarded by money. Also not all the kids meant to be high grade...
^^^^
Line 3, column 153, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: doesn't
... a greedy generation, a generation that doesnt do anything for free. In other words, t...
^^^^^^
Line 5, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...s of other ways to encourage the kids.
^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, if, really, second, so, for example, in conclusion, no doubt, as a result, first of all, in other words
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 23.0 15.1003584229 152% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 9.8082437276 122% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 13.8261648746 72% => OK
Relative clauses : 19.0 11.0286738351 172% => OK
Pronoun: 77.0 43.0788530466 179% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 66.0 52.1666666667 127% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 8.0752688172 74% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2578.0 1977.66487455 130% => OK
No of words: 584.0 407.700716846 143% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.41438356164 4.8611393121 91% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.91590194646 4.48103885553 110% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.23201250189 2.67179642975 84% => OK
Unique words: 260.0 212.727598566 122% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.445205479452 0.524837075471 85% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 773.1 618.680645161 125% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.3 1.51630824373 86% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 17.0 9.59856630824 177% => OK
Article: 5.0 3.08781362007 162% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.51792114695 85% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.94265232975 142% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 25.0 20.6003584229 121% => OK
Sentence length: 23.0 20.1344086022 114% => OK
Sentence length SD: 49.1959347914 48.9658058833 100% => OK
Chars per sentence: 103.12 100.406767564 103% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.36 20.6045352989 113% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.84 5.45110844103 89% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 5.5376344086 108% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 17.0 11.8709677419 143% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.85842293907 104% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.88709677419 82% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.355392209864 0.236089414692 151% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.10608995869 0.076458572812 139% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0590500944803 0.0737576698707 80% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.220429658923 0.150856017488 146% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0711112259246 0.0645574589148 110% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.0 11.7677419355 93% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 73.51 58.1214874552 126% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.7 10.1575268817 86% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 8.59 10.9000537634 79% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.02 8.01818996416 88% => OK
difficult_words: 83.0 86.8835125448 96% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 7.5 10.002688172 75% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 10.0537634409 111% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Write the essay in 30 minutes.
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.