Some people believe that when busy parents do not have a lot of time to spend with their children, the best use of that time is to have fun playing games or sports. Others believe that it is best to use that time doing things together that are related to schoolwork. Which of the two approaches do you prefer?
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Personally, I would rather spending the time to play video games or do various sports with children based on the two following reasons. The way we accompany our children will cultivate them to become different adult. Hence, I will elaborate the reasons why i choose the former one.
First of all, there are copious things which are as important as the schoolwork, even more. For example, teaching our children to spend their time to exploit their interest is very crucial and fundamental since as long as we are ware that we should take the initiative in exploring our dream and goal, we will be more active and encourage ourselves to make a try bravely. When playing video games or sports with our children, I will have more points of penetration to introduce the variety of this world, more chances to share my personal experiences and stories, and more scenarios to teach them to have an air of confidence. These are all critical things to our life besides the curricular work. Take myself for example, when I were little and I attended a relay race with my teammates. At the beginning, I thought I were fast enough and I can take the whole team to the victory. However, I injured my leg before the day of the contest. I almost lost my marble and cannot help but crying since I want to win that game desperately. Hence, I felt very frustrated and depleted my passion to running. It was the moment that my mother told me that I should keep patient and sustain my sportsmanship. As long as I could arm myself again and make refresh start, there were still a host of games in the future. Therefore, she said that I should learn how to be patient and wait for the next chance to become the star under the spotlight. That is a very impressive story in my life, teaching me a lesson of patience. I firmly believe that this is hard to learn from the textbook.
Second, it is always my faith that children should be happy and live without worries. Only there are some time for them to relax and escape from the book, for sure they have to engage themselves in the class, can children grow up with a healthy and ground mindset.
Adults mention the concept of work-life balance, this is not some ground-breaking theory, very frequently, and I think we have to understand those children need to spend their time off campus to do whatever they like. This is very critical to shape a character of a kid. I have a family taking care me gently. They won't push me to cram school when I were very young, instead, they allow me to choose the club and sport I were interested in, making me outgoing and proud of my childhood. Therefore, I prefer to this time to hang out with my children than to study after school with them since I want them be jubilant anytime.
In conclusion, I will spend the limited time to accompany my children to do some sports or play video games instead of schoolwork. Considering the two reasons I mentioned above, I think that is more conducive to our children by doing this. That is why I support the first choice.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 28, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[1]
Message: The verb 'would' requires the base form of the verb: 'spend'
Suggestion: spend
Personally, I would rather spending the time to play video games or do vari...
^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 258, Rule ID: I_LOWERCASE[2]
Message: Did you mean 'I'?
Suggestion: I
...Hence, I will elaborate the reasons why i choose the former one. First of all,...
^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
besides, but, first, hence, however, if, second, so, still, therefore, for example, i think, in conclusion, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 23.0 15.1003584229 152% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 15.0 9.8082437276 153% => OK
Conjunction : 22.0 13.8261648746 159% => OK
Relative clauses : 14.0 11.0286738351 127% => OK
Pronoun: 93.0 43.0788530466 216% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 72.0 52.1666666667 138% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 8.0752688172 62% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2488.0 1977.66487455 126% => OK
No of words: 551.0 407.700716846 135% => OK
Chars per words: 4.51542649728 4.8611393121 93% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.84493438435 4.48103885553 108% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.51445732594 2.67179642975 94% => OK
Unique words: 271.0 212.727598566 127% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.491833030853 0.524837075471 94% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 777.6 618.680645161 126% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.51630824373 92% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 23.0 9.59856630824 240% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.51792114695 85% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.94265232975 61% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 27.0 20.6003584229 131% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 20.1344086022 99% => OK
Sentence length SD: 60.9878442542 48.9658058833 125% => OK
Chars per sentence: 92.1481481481 100.406767564 92% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.4074074074 20.6045352989 99% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.44444444444 5.45110844103 82% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.53405017921 110% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.5376344086 36% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 15.0 11.8709677419 126% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 3.85842293907 130% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.88709677419 143% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.22662138085 0.236089414692 96% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0565360613849 0.076458572812 74% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0727854989708 0.0737576698707 99% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.154497209949 0.150856017488 102% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.035052664098 0.0645574589148 54% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.1 11.7677419355 86% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 68.1 58.1214874552 117% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.7 10.1575268817 86% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 8.94 10.9000537634 82% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.35 8.01818996416 92% => OK
difficult_words: 95.0 86.8835125448 109% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 10.002688172 110% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 10.0537634409 99% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Write the essay in 30 minutes.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.