Some young people are free in the evenings or have days off at school, which way can bring them the most benefit?
Accumulating work experience by taking a part-time job or volunteering in a community
Learning to play a sport
Learning to play a musical instrument
Young people, nowadays, suffer huge stress from daily overwhelming work so that only a little time can be controlled by themselves after school or at night. And at that time, they have access to spend the time on activity they favor, which can release their tight mind. Now, people are able to provide three ways to these young people. Personally, I prefer the advice that learning to platy a sport can allow young people to benefit more than other two.
To begin with, doing exercise can help young people release their accumulated pressure. In their daily life, they have to cost vast energy and time for study or work, thus it is exceedingly important for them to divert their attention to other things during the little free time. What’s more, learning to play a sport not only can benefit to release mind, but obtain a healthier body to deal with latter work easily since just a little sports can allow them to relax a number of aspects of their body such as neck, shoulders and tension in face. The data from research center indicates that people who are often doing sports are usually energetic and vivacious and have a positive attitude toward their life. Therefore, I believe that playing a sport can allow young people to benefit more in the short free time.
In addition, learning to play a musical instrument will not be able to release people whatever on mind or physical due to the fact that it is vastly difficult learn to play a instrument. If panting to play a instrument well, people have to spend huge energy and time on it. But it also may not ensure them play as good as they expect. Thus, taking advantage of just little time cannot benefit them a lot even young people also need to suffer the sense of pain from only can play just a little bit notes, which never help them release their mind. What’s more, releasing their body will be more inefficient than doing sports.
Finally, doing part-time jobs and volunteering in a community are not capable of offering a chance for these young people to accumulate enough experience which may benefit to them. Due to the fact that the work hour of such work is usually short, thus young people will not understand the pattern and frame of operation in such company, which means young people cannot gain the most useful information from such work and just earning wage or communicate to people in community. These basically can provide young people with just a little bit benefit. Moreover, some of such companies are also in possession of high threshold for these young people who expect to join the work.
In the nutshell, the second and third advice both have high requirement and cannot gain some accomplishments or useful experience in the short time. Thus they are not suitable for these young people who only own little time after work or school. But the threshold of sports is very low and effective which is perfect advice among these three.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 174, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...at it is vastly difficult learn to play a instrument. If panting to play a instru...
^
Line 5, column 207, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...o play a instrument. If panting to play a instrument well, people have to spend h...
^
Line 5, column 487, Rule ID: LITTLE_BIT[1]
Message: Reduce redundancy by using 'little' or 'bit'.
Suggestion: little; bit
...sense of pain from only can play just a little bit notes, which never help them release th...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 532, Rule ID: LITTLE_BIT[1]
Message: Reduce redundancy by using 'little' or 'bit'.
Suggestion: little; bit
...ly can provide young people with just a little bit benefit. Moreover, some of such compani...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 150, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Thus,
...or useful experience in the short time. Thus they are not suitable for these young p...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, finally, if, may, moreover, second, so, therefore, third, thus, well, in addition, such as, to begin with
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 14.0 15.1003584229 93% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 18.0 9.8082437276 184% => OK
Conjunction : 21.0 13.8261648746 152% => OK
Relative clauses : 15.0 11.0286738351 136% => OK
Pronoun: 39.0 43.0788530466 91% => OK
Preposition: 65.0 52.1666666667 125% => OK
Nominalization: 10.0 8.0752688172 124% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2420.0 1977.66487455 122% => OK
No of words: 512.0 407.700716846 126% => OK
Chars per words: 4.7265625 4.8611393121 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.75682846001 4.48103885553 106% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.32112780289 2.67179642975 87% => OK
Unique words: 225.0 212.727598566 106% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.439453125 0.524837075471 84% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 747.0 618.680645161 121% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 9.59856630824 52% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 3.51792114695 28% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.86738351254 214% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 4.0 4.94265232975 81% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 20.6003584229 102% => OK
Sentence length: 24.0 20.1344086022 119% => OK
Sentence length SD: 63.6921806626 48.9658058833 130% => OK
Chars per sentence: 115.238095238 100.406767564 115% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.380952381 20.6045352989 118% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.52380952381 5.45110844103 101% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.53405017921 110% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 5.5376344086 90% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 15.0 11.8709677419 126% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88709677419 61% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.413532623898 0.236089414692 175% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.130473236853 0.076458572812 171% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0653047347577 0.0737576698707 89% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.235807857717 0.150856017488 156% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0419019323459 0.0645574589148 65% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.0 11.7677419355 110% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 55.58 58.1214874552 96% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 10.1575268817 113% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.45 10.9000537634 96% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.36 8.01818996416 92% => OK
difficult_words: 82.0 86.8835125448 94% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 10.002688172 80% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 10.0537634409 115% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.247311828 117% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.