TOEFL ESSAY: Advances in transportation and communication like the airplane and the telephone have changed the way that nations interact with each other in a global society. Choose another technological innovation that you think is important. Give specific reasons for your choice.
In the 20th century, the emergence of the internet is the most important innovation in the world. The Internet has changed the way how people can get the information and the way of communication. I would like to explain the reasons to support my opinion.
First, one of the most efficient parts of the internet is the speed. The development of the internet provided the people with the capability of using e-mail. Before the appearance of e-mail, people had to wait for mails for at least days, if you wanted to contact with business partners who lived in a different country, you also had to wait for months for an only mail. Nowadays, people can send and receive messages immediately by using e-mail. The e-mail was big impacts for the company in any area. In addition, the shopping sites such as Amazon and Walmart gave the people significant surprise about shopping. if you live in a rural area which makes you difficult access big stores, you can buy anything via an internet site.
Second, the other merit of the emergence of the internet is that the internet has changed communication. The Social Network Servis(SNS) has changed how to communicate and interaction within not only friends but also companies. For example, recently many companies have own website and account of the SNS site. They use the site for not only selling their products and advertising them but also gathering the information from customers. This interaction between companies and customers is a really good example that the internet changes communication. Moreover, the communication of between the customers such as a review site is really changing the way to search the products and affect the mind to buy them. the review site is interacting itself by customers.
In conclusion, I mentioned the reasons above, I strongly insist that the internet is one of the biggest technology innovation in the world.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 616, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: If
...le significant surprise about shopping. if you live in a rural area which makes yo...
^^
Line 5, column 708, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: The
...oducts and affect the mind to buy them. the review site is interacting itself by cu...
^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, if, moreover, really, second, so, at least, for example, in addition, in conclusion, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 8.0 15.1003584229 53% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 4.0 9.8082437276 41% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 13.8261648746 72% => OK
Relative clauses : 5.0 11.0286738351 45% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 18.0 43.0788530466 42% => OK
Preposition: 41.0 52.1666666667 79% => OK
Nominalization: 15.0 8.0752688172 186% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1580.0 1977.66487455 80% => OK
No of words: 317.0 407.700716846 78% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.98422712934 4.8611393121 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.21953715646 4.48103885553 94% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.78123972543 2.67179642975 104% => OK
Unique words: 163.0 212.727598566 77% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.514195583596 0.524837075471 98% => OK
syllable_count: 493.2 618.680645161 80% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 9.59856630824 73% => OK
Article: 9.0 3.08781362007 291% => Less articles wanted as sentence beginning.
Subordination: 3.0 3.51792114695 85% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.94265232975 81% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 20.6003584229 87% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 20.1344086022 84% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 38.6821887746 48.9658058833 79% => OK
Chars per sentence: 87.7777777778 100.406767564 87% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.6111111111 20.6045352989 85% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.11111111111 5.45110844103 112% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.5376344086 36% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 11.8709677419 59% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.85842293907 52% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 9.0 4.88709677419 184% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.12668019504 0.236089414692 54% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0416382244852 0.076458572812 54% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0314637639269 0.0737576698707 43% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0804255128631 0.150856017488 53% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0257332641317 0.0645574589148 40% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.8 11.7677419355 92% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 54.22 58.1214874552 93% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 10.1575268817 97% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.31 10.9000537634 104% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.27 8.01818996416 103% => OK
difficult_words: 76.0 86.8835125448 87% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 10.002688172 80% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.8 10.0537634409 88% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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We are expecting: No. of Words: 350 while No. of Different Words: 200
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 60.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 18.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.