TOPIC # 35 Do you agree or disagree with the following statement Attending a live performance (for example, a play, a concert, or sporting event) is more enjoyable than watching the same event on television.
A live performance has a special spirits on our lives. It have an amazing thing to affect our personality as well as our mode. Some people would agree that watching events on the television is more enjoyable since it more comfortable. Others would disagree. In my view, attending a live performance is more enjoyable than watching the same event on television for two imperative reasons.
To begin with, presence a large population in performance surronding you multiplies the joy. Through stadium, concert, operas, we can see many people with you and this is really a tremendous thing to your psychological effect. Take myself as an example, last year, i went to a concert and it was very good for me since I was nervous and frustrated about my pharmacy school. In fact, I failed clinical pharmacy so I was desperate so I had decided to go to a concert. It was definitely joyful since I observed all people around me who were dancing and singing with the concert. It was good for me because I changed the atmosphere and I started to change my mind and it encouraged me to study hard. In contrast, if I saw this concert in television, I wouldn't enjoy as a real one. This experience taught me that with a live performacne, we will motivate to spend a leasure time with other people in the performance.
Hence, in addition to the people, most of live performance held in a beautiful places that fascinate us. In order to attract many spactators to the performance such as a play, an operas, a concert and even sporting event, most of performance take place in places that have a huge buildings. in this buildings, you will see lights, loud speakers, or a big theater. For instance, my sister went to a basketball event and she was marveled about the staduim since it contains many attractive things. Also , she likes going there becuase she likes to see on of her favorite player who is very handsom. In addition, she was able to take a picture with him and she like to observe her favorite player playng in front of her eyes. On the other hand, television doesn't posess this all features and we can't see famous and professional people in real way. As we can clearly see, live performance is a great to inspire us to be in contact with celebrities.
By the way on conclusion, based on the argument above, I concur that a live performance is more joyful to our life. We should sometimes watch a live performance to take advantage of its benefit.
A live performance has a special spirits on our lives
A live performance has a special spirit on our lives
A live performance has special spirits on our lives
It have an amazing thing
It has an amazing thing
since it more comfortable.
since it is more comfortable.
most of live performance held in a beautiful places
most of live performances are held in beautiful places
most of performance take place in places that have a huge buildings.
most of performances take place in places that have a huge building.
in this buildings
in the buildings
live performance is a great to inspire u
live performance is great to inspire u
Sentence: To begin with, presence a large population in performance surronding you multiplies the joy.
Error: surronding Suggestion: surrounding
Sentence: This experience taught me that with a live performacne, we will motivate to spend a leasure time with other people in the performance.
Error: performacne Suggestion: performance
Error: leasure Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: In order to attract many spactators to the performance such as a play, an operas, a concert and even sporting event, most of performance take place in places that have a huge buildings. in this buildings, you will see lights, loud speakers, or a big theater.
Error: spactators Suggestion: spectators
Sentence: For instance, my sister went to a basketball event and she was marveled about the staduim since it contains many attractive things.
Error: staduim Suggestion: stadium
Sentence: Also , she likes going there becuase she likes to see on of her favorite player who is very handsom.
Error: handsom Suggestion: handsome
Error: becuase Suggestion: because
Sentence: In addition, she was able to take a picture with him and she like to observe her favorite player playng in front of her eyes.
Error: playng Suggestion: playing
Sentence: On the other hand, television doesn't posess this all features and we can't see famous and professional people in real way.
Error: posess Suggestion: possess
flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 7 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 9 2
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 20 in 30
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 7 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 9 2
No. of Sentences: 22 15
No. of Words: 438 350
No. of Characters: 1956 1500
No. of Different Words: 219 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.575 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.466 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.69 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 132 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 97 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 65 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 44 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 19.909 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.862 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.591 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.299 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.48 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.212 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5