TPO-01 - Independent Writing Task Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?At universities and colleges, sports and social activities are just as important as classes and libraries and should receive equal financial support.Use specific reaso

University provides stepping stone into the world of opportunities.There is no doubt in my mind that academics are important to students when they enter college: after all, universities are very fundamental to student life. However, is it important give preference to classes and libraries when young generation enrolled in a university? Many people believe that classes should be given more importance when students go to a university. On the other hand, I think sports and social activities should be given equal consideration. I hold this viewpoint for following reason which I will explore in the following essay.

To begin with, young generation enters university very shy and introvert, and athletic participation and social interaction help students to develop skills necessary to work in a group and make them comfortable with people from all walks of the life. My brother's experience is a convincing example of what I mean. Five years ago, when he enrolled in the California State University, he was very shy, he neither enjoyed talking to anyone nor liked working with others. However, he is very much interested in basketball and he chose the college solely based on the fact that the University is known for his on-court success. He participated in the basketball with other teammates. With regular participation and interaction with others, he became very confident and friendly with everyone. Not only this, because of a good sports team, he got an opportunity to represent the college at an International level, which brought fame and publicity to the college. This example clearly demonstrates that without a good sports team, my brother had not got an opportunity to meet people which made him a confident person. He often mentions that it all happened because of his participation in the college sports team.

Furthermore, sports is a very good business for the college. A good sports team can bring revenue to the university. Today, Universities all over the world experiencing funding crisis and an athletic team can bring a lot of money to the college through sponsorship, ticket sales etc. Many individuals and businesses are happy to sponsor their favorite sports team in exchange for promotional consideration. In return, the money can be used by the college to build other facilities such as libraries, dormitories. This is another example why a university should finance the sports team. As I mentioned above, my brother represented the basketball team internationally, and this gave the college publicity and many sponsors sponsored the college basketball team, as a result of the surplus money, his college build many facilities for students. This example explains some of the financial advantages of having a good sports facility.

All in all, I strongly believe college should give equal financial support to the college sports as they give to academics. This is because it helps a student to be more social and also it has a financial advantage as well.

Votes
Average: 7.8 (3 votes)
Essay Categories

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 68, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: There
...g stone into the world of opportunities.There is no doubt in my mind that academics a...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 866, Rule ID: SOME_OF_THE[1]
Message: Simply use 'some'.
Suggestion: some
...ies for students. This example explains some of the financial advantages of having a good s...
^^^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, furthermore, however, if, so, well, after all, i mean, i think, no doubt, such as, as a result, to begin with, on the other hand

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 16.0 15.1003584229 106% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 9.8082437276 82% => OK
Conjunction : 16.0 13.8261648746 116% => OK
Relative clauses : 12.0 11.0286738351 109% => OK
Pronoun: 43.0 43.0788530466 100% => OK
Preposition: 57.0 52.1666666667 109% => OK
Nominalization: 13.0 8.0752688172 161% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2511.0 1977.66487455 127% => OK
No of words: 483.0 407.700716846 118% => OK
Chars per words: 5.19875776398 4.8611393121 107% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.68799114503 4.48103885553 105% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.03307895016 2.67179642975 114% => OK
Unique words: 231.0 212.727598566 109% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.478260869565 0.524837075471 91% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 806.4 618.680645161 130% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.51630824373 112% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 18.0 9.59856630824 188% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 24.0 20.6003584229 117% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 20.1344086022 99% => OK
Sentence length SD: 56.3354905899 48.9658058833 115% => OK
Chars per sentence: 104.625 100.406767564 104% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.125 20.6045352989 98% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.58333333333 5.45110844103 102% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.5376344086 36% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 15.0 11.8709677419 126% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.88709677419 123% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.152303912192 0.236089414692 65% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0523555580503 0.076458572812 68% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0413316522065 0.0737576698707 56% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.11056473101 0.150856017488 73% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0482548513586 0.0645574589148 75% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.1 11.7677419355 111% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 42.72 58.1214874552 74% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.3 10.1575268817 121% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.88 10.9000537634 118% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.03 8.01818996416 100% => OK
difficult_words: 104.0 86.8835125448 120% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 9.0 10.002688172 90% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 10.0537634409 99% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.