TPO 35- Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?Famous entertainers and athletes deserve to have more privacy than they have now.Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

one of the salient features of our world is the phenomenon of celebrity. celebrities are in the eyesights of many people who follow them in media like Instagram, Twitter and etc. Whatever they do in their life, from dining to dancing, is published in a fraction of second throughout the world. As a result, it is rational to hold the opinion that they should have more privacy than other non-famous people. I firmly disagree with this opinion. In what follows I try to urge a rationale for my disagreement.

privacy is the matter of degree and it has a reversed relationship with fame. The more a person was famous the less he has privacy. Because the behaviors of famous people have a significant social impact. Their behavior influence society in different ways. For example, consider a singer who has a myriad of noxious habits, and also is adored by his teenage fans as an idol. we cannot easily bow down to the claim that his habits are part of his private of life and have nothing to do with his job. As far as the singer of our example is imitated by his fans, his habits are not private, to wit: they are part of the public life. he should be criticized in the public sphere for his behaviors according to established social norms.

Indeed, celebrities have a social function. they are the symbols of the aspiration of a society. In other words, they are the concrete manifestation of the ideal of a better life. therefore, celebrities do not belong to the rank of other ordinary people whose behaviors have not a major influence on society as a whole. By using an analogy, I can say that celebrities are the gods and goddess of our modern world. When a person becomes famous and is recognized as one of the gods, he loses its specific name, he is no longer a citizen among other citizens. As a result, each of his actions, regardless of its content, can be effective. therefore, we cannot easily neglect them and consider them as a matter of his private life.

Let us wrap the whole thing up. In relation to celebrities in so far as their actions influence society, we cannot count them among other ordinary people about whom the distinction between public and private life holds. celebrities do not have any kind of privacy.

Votes
Average: 6.6 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Grammar and spelling errors:
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one of the salient features of our world is...
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Suggestion: Celebrities
...r world is the phenomenon of celebrity. celebrities are in the eyesights of many people who...
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...w them in media like Instagram, Twitter and etc. Whatever they do in their life, from di...
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Suggestion: Privacy
...rge a rationale for my disagreement. privacy is the matter of degree and it has a re...
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...son was famous the less he has privacy. Because the behaviors of famous people have a s...
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... adored by his teenage fans as an idol. we cannot easily bow down to the claim tha...
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... wit: they are part of the public life. he should be criticized in the public sphe...
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...ed, celebrities have a social function. they are the symbols of the aspiration of a ...
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...estation of the ideal of a better life. therefore, celebrities do not belong to the rank ...
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...dless of its content, can be effective. therefore, we cannot easily neglect them and cons...
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Suggestion: Celebrities
... between public and private life holds. celebrities do not have any kind of privacy.
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Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, if, second, so, therefore, for example, kind of, as a result, in other words

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 18.0 15.1003584229 119% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 9.8082437276 71% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 13.8261648746 58% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 8.0 11.0286738351 73% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 44.0 43.0788530466 102% => OK
Preposition: 58.0 52.1666666667 111% => OK
Nominalization: 10.0 8.0752688172 124% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1845.0 1977.66487455 93% => OK
No of words: 399.0 407.700716846 98% => OK
Chars per words: 4.62406015038 4.8611393121 95% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.46933824581 4.48103885553 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.63399101773 2.67179642975 99% => OK
Unique words: 194.0 212.727598566 91% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.486215538847 0.524837075471 93% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 605.7 618.680645161 98% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 13.0 9.59856630824 135% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.51792114695 142% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.94265232975 121% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 25.0 20.6003584229 121% => OK
Sentence length: 15.0 20.1344086022 74% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 38.0205418162 48.9658058833 78% => OK
Chars per sentence: 73.8 100.406767564 74% => OK
Words per sentence: 15.96 20.6045352989 77% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.28 5.45110844103 60% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 11.0 5.5376344086 199% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 11.8709677419 67% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 3.85842293907 130% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 12.0 4.88709677419 246% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.175000011966 0.236089414692 74% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.051917797302 0.076458572812 68% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0514318965274 0.0737576698707 70% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.110912370355 0.150856017488 74% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0429985726956 0.0645574589148 67% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 8.3 11.7677419355 71% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 64.71 58.1214874552 111% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.0 10.1575268817 79% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.22 10.9000537634 85% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.74 8.01818996416 97% => OK
difficult_words: 85.0 86.8835125448 98% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 7.0 10.002688172 70% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.0 10.0537634409 80% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 10.247311828 78% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 66.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 20.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.