TPO21 – Independent: A/D? For success in a future job, the ability to relate well to people is more important than studying hard in school.
sucess is a critical measurement of own's achievement in life. some people think that sucess in job is due to the behavioral approach while some think it is the result of hardwork in school . I think both aspects are crucial. But if I have to be on one side, I think the ablility to relate to people is more important for sucess in future jobs. I feel this way because of two main reasons , which I will explore in following paragraphs.
Firstly , Teamwork or collaboration is part of many jobs. In every job it is likey that you need to report to someone , learn from your seniors or teach the juniors . These all involves the quality of empathy. when you are a new hire you need to learn from your seniors and when you become a senior there will be people whom you need to train. if you forget your initial days of training and expect the new hire to give output from their first day then you might yourself be dissapointed or you might be a proven a wrong mentor. I have my own bitter experience on this , in my first internship I had a mentor who was totally negligent on me , he never responded me when I texted him with my problems, may be he expected me to know everything , however he expected only output . I think he never understood that nobody knows everything at first place , so I never liked him , and I wasnot progessing at all . that also affected his reputation as a mentor.
Secondly, what we learn in our school and what we do at our job are two different things . we only learn the theoritical concept in classroom and at jobs we need to implement it. Even if were hardworking and high grader in school . we are not likely to get success in our job. we must work in a team , respect and understand each other's decision, respect each others role .A pesron who shows supremecy and considers own idea to be best is never liked by their team mates , this will slowly affect thier attitude toward you . For example , I had a friend who used to quiet arrogant and laways wanted his idea to be followed . His team mates irrated with him , didnt contributed efficiently and put extra load on him . this took them more time to finish the project .The result also was not as expected . Thus it is important to respect each others ideas at team.
In conclusion , To achieve sucess in every work , one should know how to realte with people.
Grammar and spelling errors:
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Suggestion: Sucess
sucess is a critical measurement of owns achie...
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...easurement of owns achievement in life. some people think that sucess in job is due ...
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...k it is the result of hardwork in school . I think both aspects are crucial. But i...
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Line 1, column 331, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
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...o people is more important for sucess in future jobs. I feel this way because of ...
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Line 1, column 389, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
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...eel this way because of two main reasons , which I will explore in following parag...
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...ore in following paragraphs. Firstly , Teamwork or collaboration is part of ma...
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Line 3, column 118, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
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...likey that you need to report to someone , learn from your seniors or teach the ju...
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Line 3, column 165, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
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...n from your seniors or teach the juniors . These all involves the quality of empat...
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...se all involves the quality of empathy. when you are a new hire you need to learn fr...
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... will be people whom you need to train. if you forget your initial days of trainin...
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Line 3, column 569, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
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... I have my own bitter experience on this , in my first internship I had a mentor ...
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...my own bitter experience on this , in my first internship I had a mentor who was ...
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Line 3, column 642, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
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...a mentor who was totally negligent on me , he never responded me when I texted him...
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Line 3, column 703, Rule ID: MAY_BE[1]
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... me when I texted him with my problems, may be he expected me to know everything , how...
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Line 3, column 743, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
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...may be he expected me to know everything , however he expected only output . I thi...
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Line 3, column 777, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
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...ything , however he expected only output . I think he never understood that nobody...
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Line 3, column 851, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
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Suggestion: ,
...t nobody knows everything at first place , so I never liked him , and I wasnot pro...
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Line 3, column 874, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
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...ng at first place , so I never liked him , and I wasnot progessing at all . that a...
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Line 3, column 907, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
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...ked him , and I wasnot progessing at all . that also affected his reputation as a ...
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... him , and I wasnot progessing at all . that also affected his reputation as a mento...
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Line 5, column 31, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
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...ntor. Secondly, what we learn in our school and what we do at our job are two...
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Line 5, column 90, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
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...e do at our job are two different things . we only learn the theoritical concept i...
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...o at our job are two different things . we only learn the theoritical concept in c...
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Line 5, column 188, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
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...at jobs we need to implement it. Even if were hardworking and high grader in scho...
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Line 5, column 232, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
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Suggestion: .
...re hardworking and high grader in school . we are not likely to get success in our...
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Line 5, column 235, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
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...hardworking and high grader in school . we are not likely to get success in our jo...
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Line 5, column 280, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
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Suggestion: We
...e not likely to get success in our job. we must work in a team , respect and under...
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Line 5, column 302, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...ccess in our job. we must work in a team , respect and understand each others deci...
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Line 5, column 363, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'others'' or 'other's'?
Suggestion: others'; other's
...tand each others decision, respect each others role .A pesron who shows supremecy and ...
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Line 5, column 374, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
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...thers decision, respect each others role .A pesron who shows supremecy and conside...
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Suggestion: A
...ers decision, respect each others role .A pesron who shows supremecy and consider...
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Line 5, column 473, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
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Suggestion: ,
... best is never liked by their team mates , this will slowly affect thier attitude ...
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Line 5, column 525, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
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... slowly affect thier attitude toward you . For example , I had a friend who used t...
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Line 5, column 539, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
... thier attitude toward you . For example , I had a friend who used to quiet arroga...
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Line 5, column 625, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
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Suggestion: .
...nd laways wanted his idea to be followed . His team mates irrated with him , didn...
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Line 5, column 636, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...anted his idea to be followed . His team mates irrated with him , didnt contribut...
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Line 5, column 660, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
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Suggestion: ,
...lowed . His team mates irrated with him , didnt contributed efficiently and put e...
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Line 5, column 663, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
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Suggestion: didn't
...ed . His team mates irrated with him , didnt contributed efficiently and put extra l...
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Line 5, column 718, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
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...ed efficiently and put extra load on him . this took them more time to finish the ...
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Line 5, column 721, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
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Suggestion: This
...efficiently and put extra load on him . this took them more time to finish the proje...
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Line 5, column 767, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
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...ook them more time to finish the project .The result also was not as expected . Th...
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Suggestion: The
...k them more time to finish the project .The result also was not as expected . Thus ...
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Line 5, column 804, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
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...ect .The result also was not as expected . Thus it is important to respect each ot...
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Suggestion: Thus,
... .The result also was not as expected . Thus it is important to respect each others ...
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Line 8, column 14, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
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Suggestion: ,
...others ideas at team. In conclusion , To achieve sucess in every work , one s...
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Line 8, column 48, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
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Suggestion: ,
...lusion , To achieve sucess in every work , one should know how to realte with peop...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, firstly, however, if, may, second, secondly, so, then, thus, while, as to, for example, i feel, i think, in conclusion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 22.0 15.1003584229 146% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 9.8082437276 122% => OK
Conjunction : 14.0 13.8261648746 101% => OK
Relative clauses : 12.0 11.0286738351 109% => OK
Pronoun: 67.0 43.0788530466 156% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 56.0 52.1666666667 107% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 8.0752688172 74% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1909.0 1977.66487455 97% => OK
No of words: 431.0 407.700716846 106% => OK
Chars per words: 4.42923433875 4.8611393121 91% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.55637350225 4.48103885553 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.45214455552 2.67179642975 92% => OK
Unique words: 222.0 212.727598566 104% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.515081206497 0.524837075471 98% => OK
syllable_count: 595.8 618.680645161 96% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.51630824373 92% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 15.0 9.59856630824 156% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.51792114695 85% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.94265232975 81% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 23.0 20.6003584229 112% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 20.1344086022 89% => OK
Sentence length SD: 57.4471072581 48.9658058833 117% => OK
Chars per sentence: 83.0 100.406767564 83% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.7391304348 20.6045352989 91% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.91304347826 5.45110844103 108% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 46.0 5.5376344086 831% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 4.0 11.8709677419 34% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 3.85842293907 156% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 13.0 4.88709677419 266% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.105476231872 0.236089414692 45% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0344806166217 0.076458572812 45% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0568218740237 0.0737576698707 77% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0653741939194 0.150856017488 43% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0639464210075 0.0645574589148 99% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 8.8 11.7677419355 75% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 70.13 58.1214874552 121% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 7.9 10.1575268817 78% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 8.41 10.9000537634 77% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.39 8.01818996416 92% => OK
difficult_words: 78.0 86.8835125448 90% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 7.0 10.002688172 70% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 10.0537634409 92% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.