Some people believe that in order to thrive, a society must put its own overall success before the well-being of its individual citizens. Others believe that the well-being of a society can only be measured by the general welfare of all its people.
Write a response in which you discuss which view more closely aligns with your own position and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should address both of the views presented.
individual is the important part of the society. it has also been a controversial to decide whether society thrive by prioritizing its own sucess or by welfare of all its people. As both are complementary. however a society where all people are happy can be considered a better one than the successful society where some people are extremely marginalized .
it is difficult to keep every people happy , but it should be always be taken care that no people are suffering because of the societal rule that focus on majority of the people. it is important to consider that variety of people with different standard, income live in a society , and some rules or decision in favour of the society might impair the freedom of people . For example collecting donation for developing a park can be a good initiative toward societal development as it provides people space to exercise, entertainment, connect to nature. but some people might not be able to contribute due to their own financial problem and they might have to sacrifice their own fundamental need just to fit in the society. So, the leaders of society should always be aware that the development is not affecting some people in other way.
The diverse the society there would be the diversity of opinion and beliefs. same thing that is pious to one group might be impious to another group. addressing the cultural difference and creating a cumulative environment is a most for any society otherwise the religious or cultural war are very likely to appear. For example , in developing countries like India and Nepal where women are not considered the equal part of society , they are kept deprived from various social role. Furthermore , they are often killed for not bringing dowries . but there are also people in the same society who want to come out of this orthodox and provide equal opportunity to people. there areoften such clash between people with different belief. A rule beneficial to both party should be brought by the societyto create harmony among every people.
however , As it is not possible to adress problem of every people and take every individual hand in hand. Of course there will be difference in requirement, visions,beleifs. addressing to one's problem might give rise to another . Even the most important construction for society might cause people to shcation, For
Grammar and spelling errors:
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Suggestion: Individual
individual is the important part of the society. i...
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Suggestion: It
...l is the important part of the society. it has also been a controversial to decide...
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Message: “As” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...sucess or by welfare of all its people. As both are complementary. however a socie...
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Line 1, column 207, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
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Suggestion: However
... its people. As both are complementary. however a society where all people are happy ca...
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Suggestion: however,
... its people. As both are complementary. however a society where all people are happy ca...
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Line 1, column 332, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
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Suggestion:
...successful society where some people are extremely marginalized . it is difficu...
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Line 1, column 356, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
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Suggestion: .
... some people are extremely marginalized . it is difficult to keep every people ...
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Suggestion: It
... people are extremely marginalized . it is difficult to keep every people happy...
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Suggestion: ,
... is difficult to keep every people happy , but it should be always be taken care t...
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Suggestion: It
...e that focus on majority of the people. it is important to consider that variety o...
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Line 2, column 280, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...erent standard, income live in a society , and some rules or decision in favour of...
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Line 2, column 369, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
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Suggestion: .
...ciety might impair the freedom of people . For example collecting donation for dev...
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Suggestion:
...people space to exercise, entertainment, connect to nature. but some people might...
^^
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Suggestion: But
...ise, entertainment, connect to nature. but some people might not be able to contri...
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Suggestion: Same
...e the diversity of opinion and beliefs. same thing that is pious to one group might ...
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Suggestion: Addressing
...roup might be impious to another group. addressing the cultural difference and creating a ...
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... otherwise the religious or cultural war are very likely to appear. For example ,...
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Suggestion: ,
... are very likely to appear. For example , in developing countries like India and ...
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Suggestion:
...eveloping countries like India and Nepal where women are not considered the equal...
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Line 4, column 434, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...not considered the equal part of society , they are kept deprived from various soc...
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Line 4, column 497, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...ed from various social role. Furthermore , they are often killed for not bringing ...
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Line 4, column 546, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
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Suggestion: .
...re often killed for not bringing dowries . but there are also people in the same s...
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Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: But
...often killed for not bringing dowries . but there are also people in the same socie...
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Suggestion: There
...nd provide equal opportunity to people. there areoften such clash between people wit...
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Suggestion:
...portunity to people. there areoften such clash between people with different beli...
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Suggestion: However
... create harmony among every people. however , As it is not possible to adress probl...
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Line 6, column 8, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
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Suggestion: ,
... harmony among every people. however , As it is not possible to adress problem...
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Line 6, column 165, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
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Suggestion: , beleifs
...ll be difference in requirement, visions,beleifs. addressing to ones problem might give ...
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Suggestion: Addressing
...erence in requirement, visions,beleifs. addressing to ones problem might give rise to anot...
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Line 6, column 189, Rule ID: ONES[1]
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Suggestion: one's
...irement, visions,beleifs. addressing to ones problem might give rise to another . Ev...
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Suggestion: .
... ones problem might give rise to another . Even the most important construction fo...
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Line 6, column 311, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... society might cause people to shcation, For
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Suggestion:
...ety might cause people to shcation, For
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Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, furthermore, however, if, so, for example, of course
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 27.0 19.5258426966 138% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 12.4196629213 113% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 14.8657303371 87% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 11.3162921348 80% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 19.0 33.0505617978 57% => OK
Preposition: 51.0 58.6224719101 87% => OK
Nominalization: 9.0 12.9106741573 70% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1958.0 2235.4752809 88% => OK
No of words: 391.0 442.535393258 88% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.00767263427 5.05705443957 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.44676510885 4.55969084622 98% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.78950616479 2.79657885939 100% => OK
Unique words: 195.0 215.323595506 91% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.498721227621 0.4932671777 101% => OK
syllable_count: 650.7 704.065955056 92% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59117977528 107% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 6.24550561798 80% => OK
Article: 3.0 4.99550561798 60% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.10617977528 64% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.77640449438 225% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 2.0 4.38483146067 46% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 20.2370786517 104% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 23.0359550562 78% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 49.8105708713 60.3974514979 82% => OK
Chars per sentence: 93.2380952381 118.986275619 78% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.619047619 23.4991977007 79% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.0 5.21951772744 57% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 33.0 7.80617977528 423% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 10.2758426966 78% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 5.13820224719 136% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.83258426966 124% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.336027234926 0.243740707755 138% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0946160775144 0.0831039109588 114% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0770747668382 0.0758088955206 102% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.224488911931 0.150359130593 149% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.104241861086 0.0667264976115 156% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.5 14.1392134831 81% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 44.75 48.8420337079 92% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 12.1743820225 94% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.78 12.1639044944 97% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.8 8.38706741573 93% => OK
difficult_words: 81.0 100.480337079 81% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 11.8971910112 71% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 11.2143820225 82% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.7820224719 102% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.