You have enough money to purchase either a house or a business. Which would you choose to buy?
An accommodation and a business, the source of livelihood, are both crucial portions of life. Personally, I believe that purchasing house is preponderant part of life. I feel this way for two main reasons, and I will develop these ideas in the subsequent paragraphs.
To begin with, having a satisfactory place at which people live is significant factor of agreeable life. Without having the convenient location of living, the possibility of succeeding in life will be somewhat reduced because they cannot arrange important things, studying about business and planning matters appropriately. Moreover, their psychology may be harmed if they do not have a comfortable place to resting and developing themselves. Thereby, people who do not have the proper place to sleep have less possibility of accomplishing the business adequately. To illustrate this, I would like to share my brother’s experience as establishing a company few years ago. He founded the institution of educating young people with his all money before he buys a house. Unfortunately, he was spending night at his office because he had not another place to go. Afterwards, he started feeling anxious about the situation, and felt extremely uncomfortable, which are the reasons why he lost the commitment and gave up his business. Drawing from the experience of people whom I know well, the appropriate living place will provide additional emotional strength for individuals, which is key factor to succeed.
Secondly, starting a business is risky for everyone, especially individual possessing no property, house. Whether the business will be lucrative is unpredictable, and even the most advanced man can end up not keeping up with the market. Furthermore, if individuals possess accommodation, they will be left with their house at least despite the fact that their jobs turn unsuccessful. Hence, having the house before beginning novel business will decrease the chance of living impoverished life. My friend’s experience is a compelling example of this. She opened the store of dessert after purchasing the flat several years ago. She failed to arrange the sell properly and lost the marker to her competitors, but it was not the destruction to her because she had satisfactory place to continue her life. As I deducted from her circumstance, having a background property before entering the market will ease the pain of losing the business.
To sum up, I would like to get a house rather than making business if I had enough money. This is because, having a good accommodation to spend time can improve the quality of feeling and emotion, and relieve the pain of lost if individual lose the market.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 268, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ese ideas in the subsequent paragraphs. To begin with, having a satisfactory pla...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 1206, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...iduals, which is key factor to succeed. Secondly, starting a business is risky f...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 939, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...l ease the pain of losing the business. To sum up, I would like to get a house r...
^^^^^
Line 7, column 115, Rule ID: A_UNCOUNTABLE[3]
Message: Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply 'good accommodation'.
Suggestion: good accommodation
...d enough money. This is because, having a good accommodation to spend time can improve the quality o...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, furthermore, hence, if, may, moreover, second, secondly, so, well, at least, i feel, to begin with, to sum up
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 15.0 15.1003584229 99% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 13.0 9.8082437276 133% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 13.8261648746 80% => OK
Relative clauses : 7.0 11.0286738351 63% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 41.0 43.0788530466 95% => OK
Preposition: 54.0 52.1666666667 104% => OK
Nominalization: 13.0 8.0752688172 161% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2252.0 1977.66487455 114% => OK
No of words: 431.0 407.700716846 106% => OK
Chars per words: 5.22505800464 4.8611393121 107% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.55637350225 4.48103885553 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.07381601862 2.67179642975 115% => OK
Unique words: 239.0 212.727598566 112% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.554524361949 0.524837075471 106% => OK
syllable_count: 716.4 618.680645161 116% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.51630824373 112% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 13.0 9.59856630824 135% => OK
Article: 4.0 3.08781362007 130% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.51792114695 57% => OK
Conjunction: 5.0 1.86738351254 268% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 4.0 4.94265232975 81% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 20.6003584229 107% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 20.1344086022 94% => OK
Sentence length SD: 39.1020333009 48.9658058833 80% => OK
Chars per sentence: 102.363636364 100.406767564 102% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.5909090909 20.6045352989 95% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.18181818182 5.45110844103 95% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.5376344086 72% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 11.8709677419 93% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 3.85842293907 156% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.88709677419 102% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.169775377234 0.236089414692 72% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0503570872829 0.076458572812 66% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0512967256141 0.0737576698707 70% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.105726711401 0.150856017488 70% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0425059367111 0.0645574589148 66% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.0 11.7677419355 110% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 43.73 58.1214874552 75% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 10.1575268817 117% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.05 10.9000537634 120% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.54 8.01818996416 107% => OK
difficult_words: 108.0 86.8835125448 124% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 9.0 10.002688172 90% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 10.0537634409 95% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 83.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 25.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.