young people can be more easily affected by opinions of these celebrities
Nowadays, the celebrities like famous actors or athletes are always exposed to the top story of TV programs or social media, so the hot-button debate exists as to whether the opinions of these celebrities would have more influence on young people rather than older people. As for me, I believe that young people can be more easily affected by opinions of these celebrities.
To begin with, the less their own experience may help explain why the youths are easily affected by opinions of celebrities. As we know, the youths have less first-hand experiences than the elder, because the main learning ways of youths are to learn from books, to be taught in the class or to listen to instructions from their parents or teachers. None of these ways is to learn the new approach or to get a new perspective on their own. Due to lack of the experience, the juveniles cannot effective form their own opinions, thus they may choose to accept other people's opinions. And it could become a more natural way for them to get ideas rather than the critical thinking. For example, my cousin Joe always believes that what his teachers said in the class is the truth all the time, even though I told him that some of them may not be true anymore after learning the knowledge in university. Finally, Joe believes what I said when I pointed out the facts in the books which is different with what his teachers said in the class. Therefore, they do not own enough ability to identify whether some opinions are true or not, which leads to that they could be much easily affected by opinions of some other people, especially their idols.
Furthermore, the youths are more often to be exposed to some social media or some TV programs about celebrities, because the main audience of these social media or some TV programs is the juvenile. And they love to follow some new trends or hot-button story about celebrities, owing to getting more common topic or attentions from the peers. According to the recent research in China, those students who love to read rumors are more easily misguided by the fake news, rather than the students who are not interested in rumors. Therefore, the longer time of exposing to some context even some lies, it is more likely for people to believe those contexts are true. Therefore, the elder people seem to be less affected by opinions of celebrities.
In summary, the opinions of celebrities could be more influent or important for the youths rather than the elders, because the less experience and more expose to social media of the youths.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 158, Rule ID: WHETHER[6]
Message: Can you shorten this phrase to just 'whether', or rephrase the sentence to avoid "as to"?
Suggestion: whether
... media, so the hot-button debate exists as to whether the opinions of these celebrities would...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 825, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ime, even though I told him that some of them may not be true anymore after learn...
^^
Line 4, column 13, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
..., especially their idols. Furthermore, the youths are more often to be exposed ...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, finally, first, furthermore, if, may, so, therefore, thus, as for, as to, even so, for example, in summary, to begin with
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 20.0 15.1003584229 132% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 9.8082437276 92% => OK
Conjunction : 14.0 13.8261648746 101% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 11.0286738351 82% => OK
Pronoun: 33.0 43.0788530466 77% => OK
Preposition: 63.0 52.1666666667 121% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 8.0752688172 62% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2112.0 1977.66487455 107% => OK
No of words: 445.0 407.700716846 109% => OK
Chars per words: 4.74606741573 4.8611393121 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.59293186426 4.48103885553 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.50487115388 2.67179642975 94% => OK
Unique words: 202.0 212.727598566 95% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.45393258427 0.524837075471 86% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 665.1 618.680645161 108% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 9.59856630824 52% => OK
Article: 8.0 3.08781362007 259% => Less articles wanted as sentence beginning.
Subordination: 6.0 3.51792114695 171% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 16.0 20.6003584229 78% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 27.0 20.1344086022 134% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 54.486200948 48.9658058833 111% => OK
Chars per sentence: 132.0 100.406767564 131% => OK
Words per sentence: 27.8125 20.6045352989 135% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.875 5.45110844103 144% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.5376344086 54% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 11.8709677419 67% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 3.85842293907 130% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88709677419 61% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.360194357351 0.236089414692 153% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.133641631773 0.076458572812 175% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.157460507028 0.0737576698707 213% => The coherence between sentences is low.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.271988617009 0.150856017488 180% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.156831961334 0.0645574589148 243% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.8 11.7677419355 126% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 52.53 58.1214874552 90% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.6 10.1575268817 124% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.57 10.9000537634 97% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.74 8.01818996416 97% => OK
difficult_words: 78.0 86.8835125448 90% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 10.002688172 140% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.8 10.0537634409 127% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 10.247311828 127% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.