Some parents offer their school-age children money for each high grade (mark) they get in school. Do you think this is a good idea?
Throughout history, human beings have perpetually been concerned about how to motivate children to study hard and prosper fast. Such a constant effort has become even more noticeable in the modern era where new technologies such as video player and computers have an inevitable impact on reducing the children`s concentration. In this regard, there has been a longstanding controversy among academicians as to whether parents should offer their school-age children money for each high grade. I personally agree with the above mentioned statement and believe that this can motivate children to study hard and improve their performance.
The most prominent reason to be mentioned here is that by offering money, people could encourage their children to study hard and become outstanding students. If different family give some money to their child after they get high grades, undeniably students study hard to earn more money and buy everything they like. For instance, If the children parents do not like to buy something as like as smart phone for their children, he can save the money he get from his parents and buy it for himself.
The other important reason crossing my mind now is that students can learn if they do something right, their parents advocate them and they will experience better life. Undoubtedly, it has a great impact on children`s behavior and assists them to think about their mistake in the school and society. To illustrate I would like to mention some available statistic about this point. The result of the survey conducted recently in my country clearly depicts that more than 68 percent of students who their family praise them after they get high marks try harder to solve their social problems and they are more responsible than other students.
The last but not the least reason by which claim is justified is that if parents give money to their children after the get the good mark, children always speak about their progress with their parents. As a result, parents are able to now about their children’s problem and they can solve it before it ruined their life. A prime example of such a practical advantages is that parents could higher better teachers to educate their children or even they can change their children`s schools if it could help them to prosper faster. Take a personal experience as an example. When I was a child I have a lots of problems with my classmates and my school`s teachers were ignored my homework and my study. After, my father know about these problems, he changed my school and eventually I become one of the best high school students of my country.
From what has been discussed above, we may safely reach the conclusion that parents should pay some money to their children after the get high marks because it can motivate them to study harder and improve their social responsibility. Moreover, I stated that this process could help parents to speak with their children and solve the problems which they have in the schools. All in all, it is anticipated that in future people will pay more heed to financially support their children when they do something good in their schools.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 410, Rule ID: WHETHER[6]
Message: Can you shorten this phrase to just 'whether', or rephrase the sentence to avoid "as to"?
Suggestion: whether
...standing controversy among academicians as to whether parents should offer their school-age c...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 453, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[1]
Message: The pronoun 'he' must be used with a third-person verb: 'gets'.
Suggestion: gets
...heir children, he can save the money he get from his parents and buy it for himself...
^^^
Line 4, column 607, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[1]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'a lot' or simply 'lots'?
Suggestion: a lot; lots
...s an example. When I was a child I have a lots of problems with my classmates and my s...
^^^^^^
Discourse Markers used:
['but', 'if', 'may', 'moreover', 'so', 'as to', 'for instance', 'such as', 'as a result']
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance in Part of Speech:
Nouns: 0.21843003413 0.261695866417 83% => OK
Verbs: 0.162116040956 0.158904122519 102% => OK
Adjectives: 0.0836177474403 0.0723426182421 116% => OK
Adverbs: 0.0409556313993 0.0435111971325 94% => OK
Pronouns: 0.109215017065 0.0277247811725 394% => OK
Prepositions: 0.116040955631 0.128828473217 90% => OK
Participles: 0.0221843003413 0.0370669169778 60% => OK
Conjunctions: 2.67247099378 2.5805825403 104% => OK
Infinitives: 0.0358361774744 0.0208969081088 171% => OK
Particles: 0.0 0.00154638098197 0% => OK
Determiners: 0.0699658703072 0.128158765124 55% => OK
Modal_auxiliary: 0.0273037542662 0.0158828679856 172% => OK
WH_determiners: 0.0136518771331 0.0114777025283 119% => OK
Vocabulary words and sentences:
No of characters: 3174.0 1645.83664459 193% => OK
No of words: 531.0 271.125827815 196% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.97740112994 6.08160592843 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.80035803286 4.04852973271 119% => OK
words length more than 5 chars: 0.335216572505 0.374372842146 90% => OK
words length more than 6 chars: 0.248587570621 0.287516216867 86% => OK
words length more than 7 chars: 0.182674199623 0.187439937562 97% => OK
words length more than 8 chars: 0.105461393597 0.113142543107 93% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.67247099378 2.5805825403 104% => OK
Unique words: 241.0 145.348785872 166% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.453860640301 0.539623497131 84% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
Word variations: 52.9163764643 53.8517498576 98% => OK
How many sentences: 20.0 13.0529801325 153% => OK
Sentence length: 26.55 21.7502111507 122% => OK
Sentence length SD: 48.7077765865 49.3711431718 99% => OK
Chars per sentence: 158.7 132.220823453 120% => OK
Words per sentence: 26.55 21.7502111507 122% => OK
Discourse Markers: 0.45 0.878197800319 51% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.09492273731 122% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 3.39072847682 88% => OK
Readability: 51.4087570621 50.5018328374 102% => OK
Elegance: 1.14207650273 1.90840788429 60% => OK
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.309493354041 0.549887131256 56% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence: 0.133811493839 0.142949733639 94% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence SD: 0.100052186904 0.0787303798458 127% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence: 0.520296006346 0.631733273073 82% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence SD: 0.1355796935 0.139662658121 97% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.118977437496 0.266732575781 45% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0831519100536 0.103435571967 80% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence: 0.409264145753 0.414875509568 99% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence SD: 0.0572436464004 0.0530846634433 108% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.208890153028 0.40443939384 52% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0141872244661 0.0528353158467 27% => The ideas may be duplicated in paragraphs.
Task Achievement:
Sentences with positive sentiment : 15.0 4.33554083885 346% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 4.45695364238 45% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.26048565121 70% => OK
Positive topic words: 10.0 3.49668874172 286% => OK
Negative topic words: 0.0 3.62251655629 0% => More negative topic words wanted.
Neutral topic words: 0.0 3.1766004415 0% => More neutral topic words wanted.
Total topic words: 10.0 10.2958057395 97% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
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Less content wanted. Write the essay in 30 minutes.
Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: This is not the final score. The e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.