TOEFL iBT
TPO 53 - Integrated Writing Task
Many countries require cigarette smokers to pay particularly high taxes on their purchases of cigarettes; similar taxes are being considered for unhealthy foods. The policy of imposing high taxes on cigarettes and other unhealthy products has a number of social benefits.
First of all, the taxes discourage people from indulging in unhealthy behaviors. Raising taxes on cigarettes, for instance, leads people to buy fewer of them. Smoking has declined as taxes on tobacco have risen, showing that these taxes do work to make society healthier. It can be expected that imposing similar taxes on unhealthy food and beverages would help reduce obesity rates.
Second, taxes of this kind are financially fair. When people get sick as a result of their smoking or eating unhealthy foods, they create medical costs. It is unfair that everyone in the society, including nonsmokers and people who follow a healthy diet, should contribute equally to covering these costs. Taxing people who engage in unhealthy behaviors creates extra income that can be used to cover the medical costs. In this way, some of the financial burden is shifted from all of society to just those who choose to participate in the unhealthy activities.
Finally, the high rate of taxation on cigarettes significantly increases revenue for the government. In addition to using this tax revenue on medical assistance, governments often use the revenue for other projects that benefit public welfare, such as building stadiums or creating public parks. Even basic government-supported services like public education benefit from these taxes. Thus, the taxes on cigarettes, and the proposed taxes on unhealthy foods, benefit everyone.
The passage states that the policy of imposing high taxes on cigarettes and other unhealthy products has a number of social benefits, also it supports it with three benefits. However, the professor explains that it is a challenge and will not be helpful in such situations, So she refutes each point.
First, the reading claim that taxes discourage people from indulging in unhealthy behaviors. Whereas, the professor oppose this point of view. As she explained, instead of smoking high-quality cigarettes people who smoke will continue smoking low-quality cigarettes because high-quality cigarettes are very expensive. In addition, people who consume unhealthy food will not stop buying unhealthy food they might continue buying these type of food even if it is expensive, so high taxes on unhealthy products will not be beneficial.
Second, the reading claim that taxes of this kind are financially fair. The professor disagrees and says that it is unfair and has a downside. She claims that the government does not take in consideration that there are people with low income and others with high income. So that only people with lower income will be affected by these taxes because people with higher income have a lot of money and this taxes will not be a problem for them.
Finally, the reading claim that the high rate of taxation on cigarettes significantly increases revenue for the government. However, the professor refutes this point. As we knew, the government depend on these taxes. The government earns millions of dollars every year from these taxes so the professor thinks that it is impossible to stop smoking. Maybe they will not allow people to smoke or they can ban smoking in private or public places, but they will never stop cigarettes.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 94, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “Whereas” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
... from indulging in unhealthy behaviors. Whereas, the professor oppose this point of vie...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, finally, first, however, if, may, second, so, whereas, in addition
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 11.0 10.4613686534 105% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 10.0 5.04856512141 198% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 7.30242825607 123% => OK
Relative clauses : 12.0 12.0772626932 99% => OK
Pronoun: 33.0 22.412803532 147% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 28.0 30.3222958057 92% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 5.01324503311 140% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1476.0 1373.03311258 107% => OK
No of words: 289.0 270.72406181 107% => OK
Chars per words: 5.10726643599 5.08290768461 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.12310562562 4.04702891845 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.65890782673 2.5805825403 103% => OK
Unique words: 142.0 145.348785872 98% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.491349480969 0.540411800872 91% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 453.6 419.366225166 108% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.55342163355 103% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 1.0 3.25607064018 31% => OK
Article: 10.0 8.23620309051 121% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 1.25165562914 240% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 1.0 1.51434878587 66% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 2.5761589404 78% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 15.0 13.0662251656 115% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 21.2450331126 89% => OK
Sentence length SD: 50.9560158917 49.2860985944 103% => OK
Chars per sentence: 98.4 110.228320801 89% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.2666666667 21.698381199 89% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.13333333333 7.06452816374 73% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.09492273731 98% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 4.19205298013 24% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 2.0 4.33554083885 46% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 8.0 4.45695364238 179% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.27373068433 117% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.235095566437 0.272083759551 86% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0752142697785 0.0996497079465 75% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0683245376581 0.0662205650399 103% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.157127751302 0.162205337803 97% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0413954181926 0.0443174109184 93% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.3 13.3589403974 92% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 52.19 53.8541721854 97% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 5.55761589404 56% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 11.0289183223 97% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.36 12.2367328918 101% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.69 8.42419426049 91% => OK
difficult_words: 57.0 63.6247240618 90% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 10.7273730684 79% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 10.498013245 91% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 11.2008830022 89% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.