TOEFL Sample essay : integrated essay from TPO 10
In this set of material, the reading passage claims that the reduction of sea otters’ population is caused by environmental pollution and provides three reasons of support. However, the lecturer finds all the ideas dubious and presents some evidence to refute them all.
First of all, the author of the passage states that the increase of chemical pollution levels in sea water leads to sea otter's death. Conversely, the lecturer brings up the idea that the reduction of sea otters’ population cannot be due to water contamination because if they died because of pollution, Sea otters' corpse will appear in see shore. But they cannot find any Dead Sea otter along the beach.
Furthermore, it is mentioned in the article that other sea mammals such as seals and sea lions populations have declined and this occurrence corroborates pollution theory. On the contrary, the professor draws attentions to the fact that this reduction is not due to water pollution but it is because of humans’ hunting. Humans haunt small whales on which orcas have been feeding and this enforces the orcas to subsist on aforementioned small mammals. So, this predation leads to the decline in sea otter’s population.
Finally the reading passage asserts that the reduction of otter's populations is not same in different locations because the level of contamination in the ocean is not stable. In contrast, the speaker disproves the idea due to the fact that the locations where the population of otters is dense are shallow and rocky. For this reason, orcas cannot go there because of their big size. Therefore, the uneven pattern of otters' population is affected by predator accessibilities.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 121, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'otters'' or 'otter's'?
Suggestion: otters'; otter's
...lution levels in sea water leads to sea otters death. Conversely, the lecturer brings ...
^^^^^^
Line 3, column 313, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'otters'' or 'otter's'?
Suggestion: otters'; otter's
... if they died because of pollution, Sea otters corpse will appear in see shore. But th...
^^^^^^
Line 7, column 1, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Finally,
...line in sea otter's population. Finally the reading passage asserts that the re...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, conversely, finally, first, furthermore, however, if, so, therefore, as to, in contrast, such as, first of all, on the contrary
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 11.0 10.4613686534 105% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 4.0 5.04856512141 79% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 7.30242825607 110% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 12.0772626932 75% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 19.0 22.412803532 85% => OK
Preposition: 37.0 30.3222958057 122% => OK
Nominalization: 19.0 5.01324503311 379% => Less nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1427.0 1373.03311258 104% => OK
No of words: 274.0 270.72406181 101% => OK
Chars per words: 5.20802919708 5.08290768461 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.0685311056 4.04702891845 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.88859563839 2.5805825403 112% => OK
Unique words: 144.0 145.348785872 99% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.525547445255 0.540411800872 97% => OK
syllable_count: 443.7 419.366225166 106% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.55342163355 103% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 2.0 3.25607064018 61% => OK
Interrogative: 0.0 0.116997792494 0% => OK
Article: 7.0 8.23620309051 85% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 1.25165562914 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 1.0 1.51434878587 66% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 2.5761589404 116% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 13.0 13.0662251656 99% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 21.2450331126 99% => OK
Sentence length SD: 47.9168411797 49.2860985944 97% => OK
Chars per sentence: 109.769230769 110.228320801 100% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.0769230769 21.698381199 97% => OK
Discourse Markers: 10.1538461538 7.06452816374 144% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.09492273731 98% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 4.19205298013 72% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 2.0 4.33554083885 46% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 4.45695364238 135% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.27373068433 117% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.346748668446 0.272083759551 127% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.130305418552 0.0996497079465 131% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0715708592134 0.0662205650399 108% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.208909554341 0.162205337803 129% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0507401378564 0.0443174109184 114% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.6 13.3589403974 102% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 50.16 53.8541721854 93% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 5.55761589404 158% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 11.0289183223 104% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.94 12.2367328918 106% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.6 8.42419426049 102% => OK
difficult_words: 68.0 63.6247240618 107% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.5 10.7273730684 135% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 10.498013245 99% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.2008830022 80% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 80.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 24.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.