TOEFL TPO 13 - Integrated Writing Task

The reading states that selling of fossiles to private ownerships is an unfortuante development for both scientists and general public and supports it with three reasons. On the other hand, the professor initially agrees with the negative consequences of the sale, but evaluate the reading and the reasons as exaggerated, then refutes each reasons.

First, the reading states that the sale of fossils will make the public suffer because fossils could be donated to museums where everyone can see them and it will lead to a decline in public interest in fossils. The professor disagrees with this statement by saying that the fossil selling makes a greater exposure which have an impact to the low level public organization, for example elementary schools, to buy fossils for their own usage, for instance showing them to the elementary students in their science classes.

Second, the reading claims that scientists are likely to lose access to some of the most important fossils and thereby miss out on potentially crucial discoveries about extinct life forms. The professor refutes the claim by saying that when the fossils are discovered, they need to be scientifically identified by scientists. Therefore, the fossils has to pass from the hands of scientists first. The identification get the scientists the opportunity to examine the fossil and extract details from it.

Finally, the reading states that most commercial fossil collectors are untrained on unearthing fossils, hence the valuable evidence associated with the fossils will get detracted. The professor says this is true but opposes this statement by saying that if the commercial excavators were not unearthing ground to find fossils, many fossils would not found. Many universities do not have enough fund and money to organize excavation with the purpose of fossil finding, and implement it with high precision. Thus, finding this valuable stones depends on unsophisticated collectors, even they may miss out the precise information which underlie the fossils.

Votes
Average: 8 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 121, Rule ID: GENERAL_XX[1]
Message: Use simply 'public'.
Suggestion: public
...nte development for both scientists and general public and supports it with three reasons. On ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 417, Rule ID: MASS_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Possible agreement error - use third-person verb forms for singular and mass nouns: 'gets'.
Suggestion: gets
...of scientists first. The identification get the scientists the opportunity to exami...
^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, finally, first, hence, if, may, second, so, then, therefore, thus, as to, for example, for instance, on the other hand

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 8.0 10.4613686534 76% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 5.04856512141 158% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 7.30242825607 137% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 12.0772626932 91% => OK
Pronoun: 21.0 22.412803532 94% => OK
Preposition: 41.0 30.3222958057 135% => OK
Nominalization: 11.0 5.01324503311 219% => Less nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1720.0 1373.03311258 125% => OK
No of words: 319.0 270.72406181 118% => OK
Chars per words: 5.39184952978 5.08290768461 106% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.22617688928 4.04702891845 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.81897499482 2.5805825403 109% => OK
Unique words: 177.0 145.348785872 122% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.554858934169 0.540411800872 103% => OK
syllable_count: 520.2 419.366225166 124% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.55342163355 103% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 1.0 3.25607064018 31% => OK
Article: 10.0 8.23620309051 121% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 1.25165562914 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 2.0 1.51434878587 132% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 2.5761589404 78% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 12.0 13.0662251656 92% => OK
Sentence length: 26.0 21.2450331126 122% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 56.0081219309 49.2860985944 114% => OK
Chars per sentence: 143.333333333 110.228320801 130% => OK
Words per sentence: 26.5833333333 21.698381199 123% => OK
Discourse Markers: 10.25 7.06452816374 145% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.09492273731 98% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 4.19205298013 48% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 4.33554083885 115% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 4.45695364238 90% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.27373068433 70% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.551200531392 0.272083759551 203% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.203414886212 0.0996497079465 204% => Sentence topic similarity is high.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.101397124163 0.0662205650399 153% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.319517666807 0.162205337803 197% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0790832209773 0.0443174109184 178% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 17.2 13.3589403974 129% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 45.09 53.8541721854 84% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 5.55761589404 158% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.4 11.0289183223 121% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.28 12.2367328918 117% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.13 8.42419426049 108% => OK
difficult_words: 85.0 63.6247240618 134% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 13.5 10.7273730684 126% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.4 10.498013245 118% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 11.2008830022 125% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 80.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 24.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.