whether Phoenician people are the first group of people circumnavigate around Africa
The listening lecture totally opposes to the reading passage in whether Phoenician people are the first group of people circumnavigate around Africa. To begin with, the reading says that Phoenician's ships are not capable of allowing them to sails long distance and conquer harsh conditions. However, the listening argues that people had this is not likely to be true. People had recreate the ships with the same style and the same material, then they try to sail it on the ocean and find out that these ships can actually allow them to sail long distance even in harsh conditions. As a result, Phoenician's ships allow them to travel long distance and in harsh conditions.
In addition, the reading suggests that Egyptian rulers were not interested in the exploration beyond their land because their is no profit. Likewise, the listening asserts that it is true that Egyptian rulers will not be interested in doing this, but only when there is no benefit. There was one king that was very interested in water transportations. He even built a cannel because he want to create new trade for his nation. In other words, there is profit in doing circumnavigate, so the Egyptian rulers were actually interested in circumnavigating.
Lastly, the reading implies that since ancient people like to make up stories in their life, the circumnavigation of Phoenician can also be a myth or story. However, the listening indicates that researchers had found some records to explain this idea. The records show that the Phoenician find the movement of the sun, it is extremely hard for them to make up a story about the movement of the sun. They would not have this knowledge if they did not circumnavigate Africa. As a result, it is true that the Phoenician had sail around Africa.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 380, Rule ID: HAD_VBP[1]
Message: Possible agreement error -- use past participle here: 'recreated'.
Suggestion: recreated
...is is not likely to be true. People had recreate the ships with the same style and the s...
^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 380, Rule ID: HAVE_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Use past participle here: 'recreated'.
Suggestion: recreated
...is is not likely to be true. People had recreate the ships with the same style and the s...
^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 121, Rule ID: THEIR_IS[1]
Message: Did you mean 'there'?
Suggestion: there
...e exploration beyond their land because their is no profit. Likewise, the listening a...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 387, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[1]
Message: The pronoun 'he' must be used with a third-person verb: 'wants'.
Suggestion: wants
...ions. He even built a cannel because he want to create new trade for his nation. In ...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, also, but, first, however, if, lastly, likewise, so, then, in addition, as a result, in other words, it is true, to begin with
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 16.0 10.4613686534 153% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 4.0 5.04856512141 79% => OK
Conjunction : 6.0 7.30242825607 82% => OK
Relative clauses : 12.0 12.0772626932 99% => OK
Pronoun: 33.0 22.412803532 147% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 39.0 30.3222958057 129% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 5.01324503311 160% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1474.0 1373.03311258 107% => OK
No of words: 300.0 270.72406181 111% => OK
Chars per words: 4.91333333333 5.08290768461 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.16179145029 4.04702891845 103% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.80127748635 2.5805825403 109% => OK
Unique words: 147.0 145.348785872 101% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.49 0.540411800872 91% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 456.3 419.366225166 109% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.55342163355 97% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 3.25607064018 123% => OK
Article: 9.0 8.23620309051 109% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 1.25165562914 160% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.51434878587 66% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 2.5761589404 116% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 15.0 13.0662251656 115% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 21.2450331126 94% => OK
Sentence length SD: 41.3045060765 49.2860985944 84% => OK
Chars per sentence: 98.2666666667 110.228320801 89% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.0 21.698381199 92% => OK
Discourse Markers: 9.06666666667 7.06452816374 128% => OK
Paragraphs: 3.0 4.09492273731 73% => More paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 4.0 4.19205298013 95% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 4.33554083885 185% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 4.45695364238 90% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.27373068433 70% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.278829258332 0.272083759551 102% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0983949236278 0.0996497079465 99% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.171587169907 0.0662205650399 259% => The coherence between sentences is low.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.172195571576 0.162205337803 106% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.127408586413 0.0443174109184 287% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.7 13.3589403974 88% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 59.64 53.8541721854 111% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 5.55761589404 56% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 11.0289183223 90% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.2 12.2367328918 92% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.31 8.42419426049 87% => OK
difficult_words: 51.0 63.6247240618 80% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 13.0 10.7273730684 121% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 10.498013245 95% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 11.2008830022 89% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Minimum four paragraphs wanted. The correct pattern:
para 1: introduction
para 2: doubt 1
para 3: doubt 2
para 4: doubt 3
Less contents wanted from the reading passages(25%), more content wanted from the lecture (75%).
Don't need a conclusion paragraph.
Read sample essays from ETS:
http://www.testbig.com/users/toeflwritingmaster
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.