Arctic deer live on islands in Canada's arctic regions. They search for food by moving over ice from island to island during the course of the year. Their habitat is limited to areas warm enough to sustain the plants on which they feed and cold enough, at least some of the year, for the ice to cover the sea separating the islands, allowing the deer to travel over it. Unfortunately, according to reports from local hunters, the deer populations are declining. Since these reports coincide with recent global warming trends that have caused the sea ice to melt, we can conclude that the purported decline in deer populations is the result of the deer's being unable to follow their age-old migration patterns across the frozen sea.
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
The above paragraph concludes that the decline in arctic deer propulations in Canada’s arctic regions is because they are unable to follow their age-old migration patterns across the frozen sea. This conclusion is based on the evidence that there are reports from local hunters that the deer population is declining and this report coincides with recent global warming trends that may have caused the sea ice to melt. Before the conclusion can hold water, there are certain evidence required.
Firstly, no data is provided in the paragraph regarding the reports from the local hunters.Providing data over the past 5-10 years of the arctic deer’s population in Canada’s arctic regions can help forming the above conclusion with much more accuracy and consistency. For Example, if the population of the deer over the course of 5-10 years is constantly declining then it will strengthen the argument made in the paragraph, but if the decline mentioned in the hunters report is just for one year then the data is not enough to strengthen the argument.
Secondly,it is assumed that since the reports of declining deer population coincide with latest global warming trends then that is the only factor. Even if the data is provided and shows that the deer population has been declining in the Canada’s arctic regions, there can be others factors relating to the deer populations decline and providing specific data that excludes any other factors involing the population decline need to be mentioned before making the argument. For Example, if there was an increase in the arctic deer hunting in the region then that could lead to decline in deers populations. Since coincidence cannot be regarded as accurate representation of a cause and effect situation. Further evidence dismissing any other cause that could have lead to arctic deer’s population decline should be mentioned.
Lastly, if the global warming is the main issue then deer’s do not need to follow old migration patterns to get food. Maybe they have followed new migration patterns leading to hunters not able to find any deer’s to hunt in the regions they are used to hunting. Hence, providing the current deers migration pattern may help strengthen or weaken the argument.
The argument as it stands lacks specific evidence to hold water. If the paragraph provides more specific data spread for deers population over the last 5-10 years backing the hunters reports and eliminating any other possibilty that could lead to deer population decline besides global warming then the argument made in the paragraph can be made.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 15 15
No. of Words: 423 350
No. of Characters: 2132 1500
No. of Different Words: 173 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.535 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.04 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.492 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 165 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 123 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 81 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 48 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 28.2 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 13.819 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.6 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.377 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.377 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.091 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 1 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 91, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Providing
...ding the reports from the local hunters.Providing data over the past 5-10 years of the ar...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 209, Rule ID: ADVISE_VBG[5]
Message: The verb 'help' is used with infinitive: 'to form' or 'form'.
Suggestion: to form; form
...n Canada's arctic regions can help forming the above conclusion with much more acc...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 9, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , it
...gh to strengthen the argument. Secondly,it is assumed that since the reports of de...
^^^
Line 3, column 85, Rule ID: THE_SUPERLATIVE[2]
Message: A determiner is probably missing here: 'with the latest'.
Suggestion: with the latest
...s of declining deer population coincide with latest global warming trends then that is the ...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 708, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Further,
...tation of a cause and effect situation. Further evidence dismissing any other cause tha...
^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 301, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'deers'' or 'deer's'?
Suggestion: deers'; deer's
...o hunting. Hence, providing the current deers migration pattern may help strengthen o...
^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
besides, but, first, firstly, hence, if, lastly, may, regarding, second, secondly, then, for example
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 22.0 19.6327345309 112% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 12.9520958084 108% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 11.1786427146 72% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 13.6137724551 81% => OK
Pronoun: 20.0 28.8173652695 69% => OK
Preposition: 51.0 55.5748502994 92% => OK
Nominalization: 26.0 16.3942115768 159% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2202.0 2260.96107784 97% => OK
No of words: 421.0 441.139720559 95% => OK
Chars per words: 5.23040380048 5.12650576532 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.52971130743 4.56307096286 99% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.74187262745 2.78398813304 98% => OK
Unique words: 176.0 204.123752495 86% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.418052256532 0.468620217663 89% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 679.5 705.55239521 96% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 2.0 4.96107784431 40% => OK
Article: 2.0 8.76447105788 23% => OK
Subordination: 7.0 2.70958083832 258% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.22255489022 47% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 15.0 19.7664670659 76% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 28.0 22.8473053892 123% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 83.1682631777 57.8364921388 144% => OK
Chars per sentence: 146.8 119.503703932 123% => OK
Words per sentence: 28.0666666667 23.324526521 120% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.66666666667 5.70786347227 117% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 5.25449101796 114% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 6.0 8.20758483034 73% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 6.88822355289 73% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.67664670659 86% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.161086919251 0.218282227539 74% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0641863115838 0.0743258471296 86% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0455813024608 0.0701772020484 65% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.106001016621 0.128457276422 83% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0302497365512 0.0628817314937 48% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 17.2 14.3799401198 120% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 43.06 48.3550499002 89% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 14.2 12.197005988 116% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.35 12.5979740519 106% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.14 8.32208582834 98% => OK
difficult_words: 83.0 98.500998004 84% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 13.5 12.3882235529 109% => OK
gunning_fog: 13.2 11.1389221557 119% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 11.9071856287 118% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.