Argue 92
Workers in the small town of Leeville take fewer sick days than workers in the large city of Masonton, 50 miles away. Moreover, relative to population size, the diagnosis of stress-related illness is proportionally much lower in Leeville than in Masonton. According to the Leeville Chamber of Commerce, these facts can be attributed to the health benefits of the relatively relaxed pace of life in Leeville.
Write a response in which you discuss one or more alternative explanations that could rival the proposed explanation and explain how your explanation(s) can plausibly account for the facts presented in the argument.
The author asserts that health benefit due to Leeville’s relaxed paced of life. Although the author’s conjecture might be hold true in certain cases, it fails to provide generally accepted evidence, eventually leads to critical questions threaten the issue.
To begin with, fewer sick days does not provide health benefit, since the status supported is vague without further explanation. As it is not clearly specified about condition, sick days stated in argument needs to be justified such as comparing sample size for two worker groups, or investigate labor intensity. If, for instance, workers in Leeville, are engaged in simple industry like forestry or fishing, and it contains low intensity with seldom working days, they could have request fewer sick days compare to workers in Masonton, yet workers are not actually beneficial of relaxed pace of life. Therefore, since condition given in the argument is vague, in order to judge if fewer sick days directly related to health benefit, description for data is necessary.
Moreover, the author supposes stress-related illness diagnosis works as health indicator with evidence of propotionally lower statistics. However, this may not be warrented without further explanation, typically frequency of residents in different city visit hospital. Basically, diagnosis is authority of doctor, who examine in the hospital. In this argument, Leeville is stated as relatively small town, hopital number per capita may be smaller than large city Masonton, so it can cause low accessibility to hospital, eventually breed fewer diagnosis of stress-related illness, despite in reality there are more unidentified patient suffered from stress in Leeville. In conclusion, additional evidence such as average access to doctor is needed to decide whether fewer diagnosis bolsters healthy status of Leeville.
Even if the author’s believe in above two passage is true, assumption that relaxed pace is only sole factor determines health, needs to be subsantiated with further support. The argument sets only one case simply introducing Leeville and Mosonton, which might be exceptional case without additional explanation. Because population in Leeville is not stated in the passage, there is possibility that other factors can interfere. If, for example, number of workers in Leeville is too small, they can even work at same corporation, and its factor is based on their weekly physical activity done by one single company, not on relaxing pace, the author’s assert losts its foundation. Hence, it lacks firm grounds for assuming that relaxing pace Is dominating factor of health.
In sum, the argument is not well supported and based on incomplete assumptions. In order to support it, the author have to provide further evidence such as comparision of labor structure, accessibility of hospital, and examine other factors that determine health for on logical decision.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 5.0 out of 6
Category: Very Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 18 15
No. of Words: 448 350
No. of Characters: 2398 1500
No. of Different Words: 233 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.601 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.353 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.753 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 198 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 162 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 108 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 62 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 24.889 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 11.274 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.722 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.316 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.557 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.055 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, hence, however, if, may, moreover, so, therefore, well, for example, for instance, in conclusion, such as, to begin with
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 24.0 19.6327345309 122% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 12.9520958084 62% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 11.1786427146 72% => OK
Relative clauses : 7.0 13.6137724551 51% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 18.0 28.8173652695 62% => OK
Preposition: 65.0 55.5748502994 117% => OK
Nominalization: 20.0 16.3942115768 122% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2487.0 2260.96107784 110% => OK
No of words: 448.0 441.139720559 102% => OK
Chars per words: 5.55133928571 5.12650576532 108% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.60065326758 4.56307096286 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.93897104802 2.78398813304 106% => OK
Unique words: 249.0 204.123752495 122% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.555803571429 0.468620217663 119% => OK
syllable_count: 798.3 705.55239521 113% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.8 1.59920159681 113% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 4.96107784431 101% => OK
Article: 6.0 8.76447105788 68% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 2.70958083832 221% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 5.0 1.67365269461 299% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 9.0 4.22255489022 213% => Less preposition wanted as sentence beginnings.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 19.7664670659 91% => OK
Sentence length: 24.0 22.8473053892 105% => OK
Sentence length SD: 69.0637788972 57.8364921388 119% => OK
Chars per sentence: 138.166666667 119.503703932 116% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.8888888889 23.324526521 107% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.22222222222 5.70786347227 127% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 0.0 5.25449101796 0% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 8.20758483034 85% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 9.0 6.88822355289 131% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.67664670659 43% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.221275865417 0.218282227539 101% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0647094078033 0.0743258471296 87% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0706746336461 0.0701772020484 101% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.103220552295 0.128457276422 80% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0955984627746 0.0628817314937 152% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 17.2 14.3799401198 120% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 30.2 48.3550499002 62% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 7.1628742515 156% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 15.0 12.197005988 123% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 15.21 12.5979740519 121% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.59 8.32208582834 115% => OK
difficult_words: 135.0 98.500998004 137% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 12.3882235529 93% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 11.1389221557 104% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.9071856287 101% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 83.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 5.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.