The following appeared in a memo to the board of the Grandview Symphony.
"The city of Grandview has provided annual funding for the Grandview Symphony since the symphony's inception ten years ago. Last year the symphony hired an internationally known conductor, who has been able to attract high-profile guest musicians to perform with the symphony. Since then, private contributions to the symphony have doubled and attendance at the symphony's concerts-in-the-park series has reached new highs. Now that the Grandview Symphony is an established success, it can raise ticket prices. Increased revenue from larger audiences and higher ticket prices will enable the symphony to succeed without funding from the city government."
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
The arguement that high ticket prices will lead to higher revenue from a larger audience is valid. This might not necesarily translate to the need to totally do away with Govenment funding and still remain a success. Hence this conclusion is faulted for the following reasons:
Private contributions may have been only a 10% of the total funds needed to finance the company hence doubling it means funding from Private contributions will now cover 20% of the funding need of the company. That is, if the total amount needed id $100,000, and Private contrutions were previously at $10,000, now doubled to $20,000. It still does meet the requirement. Hence the company cannot do away with Government funding
Secondly, raising ticket prices was appointed out to lead to little or no change to the attendance rate. However, the law of economics states that the higher the price of a good or service, the lesser the demand for it. Hence the increased price might deter interested attendees who cannot afford it to attend. This will hence reduce the expected revenue which in turn will not cover the funding need for the company.
However, in support of the argument, if it was mentioned that raising ticket prices will not discourage the growing audience, then such conclusion can be relied on.
Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 1 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 5 2
No. of Sentences: 12 15
No. of Words: 217 350
No. of Characters: 1046 1500
No. of Different Words: 122 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 3.838 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.82 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.472 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 81 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 55 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 27 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 21 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 18.083 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.921 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.917 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.342 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.565 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.03 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 218, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Hence,
...ent funding and still remain a success. Hence this conclusion is faulted for the foll...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 366, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Hence,
...00. It still does meet the requirement. Hence the company cannot do away with Governm...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 221, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Hence,
... service, the lesser the demand for it. Hence the increased price might deter interes...
^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, hence, however, if, may, second, secondly, so, still, then
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 8.0 19.6327345309 41% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 12.9520958084 108% => OK
Conjunction : 4.0 11.1786427146 36% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 6.0 13.6137724551 44% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 12.0 28.8173652695 42% => OK
Preposition: 24.0 55.5748502994 43% => More preposition wanted.
Nominalization: 9.0 16.3942115768 55% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1079.0 2260.96107784 48% => More number of characters wanted.
No of words: 217.0 441.139720559 49% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.97235023041 5.12650576532 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 3.8380880478 4.56307096286 84% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.52010961106 2.78398813304 91% => OK
Unique words: 121.0 204.123752495 59% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.557603686636 0.468620217663 119% => OK
syllable_count: 323.1 705.55239521 46% => syllable counts are too short.
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 4.96107784431 81% => OK
Article: 3.0 8.76447105788 34% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 2.70958083832 74% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.22255489022 24% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 10.0 19.7664670659 51% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 21.0 22.8473053892 92% => OK
Sentence length SD: 59.3477885013 57.8364921388 103% => OK
Chars per sentence: 107.9 119.503703932 90% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.7 23.324526521 93% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.3 5.70786347227 110% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 5.15768463074 78% => More paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 3.0 5.25449101796 57% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 4.0 8.20758483034 49% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 6.88822355289 29% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.67664670659 86% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.0414094252287 0.218282227539 19% => The similarity between the topic and the content is low.
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0153531401035 0.0743258471296 21% => Sentence topic similarity is low.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0188148689149 0.0701772020484 27% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.024499919905 0.128457276422 19% => Maybe some paragraphs are off the topic.
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0146235072237 0.0628817314937 23% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.8 14.3799401198 89% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 58.62 48.3550499002 121% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.3 12.197005988 84% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.55 12.5979740519 92% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.46 8.32208582834 102% => OK
difficult_words: 52.0 98.500998004 53% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 13.5 12.3882235529 109% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 11.1389221557 93% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 11.9071856287 84% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Minimum 250 words wanted.
It is not exactly right on the topic in the view of e-grader. Maybe there is a wrong essay topic.
Rates: 16.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 1.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.