The following appeared in a memo from the director of student housing at Buckingham College.
"To serve the housing needs of our students, Buckingham College should build a number of new dormitories. Buckingham's enrollment is growing and, based on current trends, will double over the next 50 years, thus making existing dormitory space inadequate. Moreover, the average rent for an apartment in our town has risen in recent years. Consequently, students will find it increasingly difficult to afford off-campus housing. Finally, attractive new dormitories would make prospective students more likely to enroll at Buckingham."
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
The author concluded in the memo that new dormitories in Buckingham will be needed in order to accommodate many new enrolled students based on some unwarranted assumptions. however, before evaluating the author's conclusion, three questions need to be answered.
First of all, how accurate is the trend regarding students' enrollment? the passage stated that the number of students will be doubled in fifty years. but how exactly has the trend been found? The data on which the trend holds true maybe collected from other institutions situated at Buckingham. Even if the trend is based on previous records of enrollment in Buckingham college, we can never be sure that this will hold true for the next 50 years. Another college might start taking students providing better opportunities at a more affordable cost. This assumption will not be valid in this case
Secondly, will the apartment rent never start to decrease in Buckingham? in the passage, the matter of increased house rent is mentioned. This point, though seemingly valid for some cases, will not hold true in most of the cases if the apartment rent somehow decrease due to various reasons. House rent mostly depend on the amount of space and comforts offered by the particular apartment. This is dependent on different things such as the building cost of the apartment and the facilities present in there. If Buckingham land owners take a decision to build small apartments only to accommodate college students with a relatively low rent, the assumption of the author will not hold water.
Last of all, can only the attractive dormitories make a college a great place to have the proper education? Certainly not. Fledgling students who are keen to join the best college in the town will surely look for other qualities in a college. qualities such as erudite teachers, well facilitated classrooms, state of the art laboratories will probably be more likely to attract the prospective students to enroll at Buckingham college. If one college has a great bunch of faculties with a relatively moderate accommodation place and other college has a great dormitory but no updated laboratories, students will probably be going to the prior college only because of the better offered education. So this assumption will only hold true if some other criteria are fulfilled.
From the discussions stated above, it can be inferred that housing need is a must for students in any college. but the fact that this is not the only criteria that should be fulfilled in order to enroll more prospective students. If the author can answer the questions stated above and give some more evidence, then the recommendation can be evaluated properly.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 18 15
No. of Words: 443 350
No. of Characters: 2205 1500
No. of Different Words: 206 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.588 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.977 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.732 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 149 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 123 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 94 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 63 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 24.611 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 12.406 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.667 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.31 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.544 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.089 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 174, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: However
... based on some unwarranted assumptions. however, before evaluating the authors conclusi...
^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 205, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...mptions. however, before evaluating the authors conclusion, three questions need to be ...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 72, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: The
...he trend regarding students enrollment? the passage stated that the number of stude...
^^^
Line 5, column 151, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: But
...tudents will be doubled in fifty years. but how exactly has the trend been found? T...
^^^
Line 9, column 74, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: In
... never start to decrease in Buckingham? in the passage, the matter of increased ho...
^^
Line 13, column 244, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Qualities
... look for other qualities in a college. qualities such as erudite teachers, well facilita...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 13, column 309, Rule ID: STATE_OF_THE_ART[1]
Message: Did you mean 'state-of-the-art'?
Suggestion: state-of-the-art
... teachers, well facilitated classrooms, state of the art laboratories will probably be more like...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 17, column 112, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: But
... is a must for students in any college. but the fact that this is not the only crit...
^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, however, if, look, may, regarding, second, secondly, so, then, well, such as, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 19.0 19.6327345309 97% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 21.0 12.9520958084 162% => OK
Conjunction : 7.0 11.1786427146 63% => OK
Relative clauses : 8.0 13.6137724551 59% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 15.0 28.8173652695 52% => OK
Preposition: 55.0 55.5748502994 99% => OK
Nominalization: 14.0 16.3942115768 85% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2266.0 2260.96107784 100% => OK
No of words: 443.0 441.139720559 100% => OK
Chars per words: 5.1151241535 5.12650576532 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.58776254615 4.56307096286 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.8113581311 2.78398813304 101% => OK
Unique words: 217.0 204.123752495 106% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.489841986456 0.468620217663 105% => OK
syllable_count: 703.8 705.55239521 100% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 4.96107784431 101% => OK
Article: 5.0 8.76447105788 57% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 2.70958083832 221% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 19.7664670659 111% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 22.8473053892 88% => OK
Sentence length SD: 52.1723550492 57.8364921388 90% => OK
Chars per sentence: 103.0 119.503703932 86% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.1363636364 23.324526521 86% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.63636363636 5.70786347227 81% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 8.0 5.25449101796 152% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 13.0 8.20758483034 158% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 6.88822355289 29% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 8.0 4.67664670659 171% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.227688549755 0.218282227539 104% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.068021699432 0.0743258471296 92% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0581303405704 0.0701772020484 83% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.135782358293 0.128457276422 106% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.028917548708 0.0628817314937 46% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.8 14.3799401198 89% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 51.18 48.3550499002 106% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 12.197005988 91% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.42 12.5979740519 99% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.05 8.32208582834 97% => OK
difficult_words: 96.0 98.500998004 97% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 7.0 12.3882235529 57% => Linsear_write_formula is low.
gunning_fog: 10.0 11.1389221557 90% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.9071856287 109% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.