The following appeared in a memo from the Mayor of the city of Hillview:
“In order to alleviate the serious unemployment problem in our town, we should encourage Autotech to build its automobile manufacturing plant in our area. The Hillview landfill, which has been undeveloped for decades, is a perfect site for this plant. The building and staffing of this plant will put to work thousands of Hillview residents left unemployed after Computech computer software programming company abandoned its national facility last year. I am asking the City Council to authorize a large campaign to attract the company and offer significant tax incentives to make our town attractive to this giant of car manufacturing.”
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation and the argument on which it is based are reasonable. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation
The author argues that the City Council shoudl authorize a large campaign to attract the company and offer significant tax incentives to make their town attractive to the car manufacturing company because the cuty of Hillview are facing serious unemployment problem. However the conclusion which the author makes stands of some pretty questionable assumptions.
Firstly, the author assumes that the Hillview residents who were left unemployed after Computech abandoned its national facility last year are still unemployed and did not get a job from the past one year. However, this assumptions seems are bit extreme. Employees who worked for the software based company usually would find a job because of the vast requirement of man power in the software industry.Had the author provided more evidence supporting this assumption then his argument would have made more sense.
Furthermore, assuming that automobile manufacturing plant would require employees who were left unemployeed because the unemployed residents worked for a software based company the skill set required for the automobile manufacturing plant is different from the skill set requried for the software industry. Hence, Autotech might not be able to provide jobs to the unemployed residents.
Adding to it, the author assumes that the plant would put thousands of Hillview residents to work.However, in today's technological advanced world car manufacturing plants have robots working for them. The heavy lifting and assembling which need immense precision is done by an automated machine. Hence, requirement of man power would not be as much as the author is expecting.
In conclusion, the argument which the author makes completely fails because they stand on some weak assumptions. However, had the author provided evidence to support those assumptions his arguement would have made much more sense.
Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 5 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 5 2
No. of Sentences: 12 15
No. of Words: 289 350
No. of Characters: 1559 1500
No. of Different Words: 155 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.123 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.394 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.783 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 115 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 97 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 68 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 45 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 24.083 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 12.586 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.833 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.386 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.65 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.091 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 268, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: However,
...re facing serious unemployment problem. However the conclusion which the author makes s...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 216, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[1]
Message: Did you mean 'these'?
Suggestion: these
... a job from the past one year. However, this assumptions seems are bit extreme. Empl...
^^^^
Line 3, column 243, Rule ID: BEEN_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Consider using a past participle here: 'bitten'.
Suggestion: bitten
...ar. However, this assumptions seems are bit extreme. Employees who worked for the s...
^^^
Line 3, column 300, Rule ID: ADVERB_WORD_ORDER[9]
Message: The adverb 'usually' is usually put before the verb 'company'.
Suggestion: usually company
...oyees who worked for the software based company usually would find a job because of the vast re...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 403, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Had
...t of man power in the software industry.Had the author provided more evidence suppo...
^^^
Line 7, column 99, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: However
...thousands of Hillview residents to work.However, in todays technological advanced world...
^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 76, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...he author makes completely fails because they stand on some weak assumptions. How...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
first, firstly, furthermore, hence, however, if, so, still, then, in conclusion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 10.0 19.6327345309 51% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 12.9520958084 62% => OK
Conjunction : 3.0 11.1786427146 27% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 10.0 13.6137724551 73% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 14.0 28.8173652695 49% => OK
Preposition: 23.0 55.5748502994 41% => More preposition wanted.
Nominalization: 9.0 16.3942115768 55% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1597.0 2260.96107784 71% => OK
No of words: 287.0 441.139720559 65% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.56445993031 5.12650576532 109% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.11595363751 4.56307096286 90% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.89402136516 2.78398813304 104% => OK
Unique words: 157.0 204.123752495 77% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.547038327526 0.468620217663 117% => OK
syllable_count: 491.4 705.55239521 70% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59920159681 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 1.0 4.96107784431 20% => OK
Article: 5.0 8.76447105788 57% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 2.70958083832 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.22255489022 47% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 12.0 19.7664670659 61% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 23.0 22.8473053892 101% => OK
Sentence length SD: 83.5794282903 57.8364921388 145% => OK
Chars per sentence: 133.083333333 119.503703932 111% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.9166666667 23.324526521 103% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.58333333333 5.70786347227 115% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 7.0 5.25449101796 133% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 4.0 8.20758483034 49% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 6.88822355289 29% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.67664670659 128% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.147599234094 0.218282227539 68% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0516881197767 0.0743258471296 70% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0508969945837 0.0701772020484 73% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0860005137834 0.128457276422 67% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0422848415902 0.0628817314937 67% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 16.7 14.3799401198 116% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 39.67 48.3550499002 82% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.4 12.197005988 110% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 15.26 12.5979740519 121% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.79 8.32208582834 106% => OK
difficult_words: 73.0 98.500998004 74% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 12.3882235529 93% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 11.1389221557 101% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.9071856287 101% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.