In the argument, the author proposes that Buzzoff should be employed to control pests in order to save money. To corroborate this conclusion, the author points out that the lost due to pest damage of the warehouse in Palm City, which serviced by Fly-Away is higher than the warehouse in Wintervale, which serviced by Buzzoff. However, the author should evaluate the assumptions ti establish the argument strongly.
To begin with, the author assumes that the food stored in both warehouses are about the same. However, the author should evaluate the assumption. It is possible that the food stored in each warehouse is different. For instance, Palm City may be a international port, and the warehouse is always filled with expensive imported seafood. On the contrary, Wintervale is in a rice production area, and the warehouse usaully store a large amount of relatively cheap rice. As a result, even the pest control in the Palm CIty warehouse did pretty well, it still destroyed some food worthed $20,000, but the Wintervale warehouse almost lost all rice stored in it, worthed $10,000 in total, because of pest damage. In this case, the Fly-Away perform far more effective than Buzzoff. If the author eliminates the possibilities which weaken the assumption, the argument and the conclusion might be more persuasive.
Furthemore, although the food stored in each warehouse are identical, the author also assumes that Buzzoff will be equally effective in both cities. But Buzzoff may only expert in pest control in Wintervale but is not suitable for warehouse in Palm City for different environmental conditions. To be more specific, most of day in a year in Wintervale may be cool and dry, so only few pests can grow in such environment. However, since the weather in Palm City might be more moisty and warm, more and various pests may can thrive in the warehouse. As a result, despite employing Buzzoff back to control the pests in the warehouse, it may not be that effective as it was in Wintervale, or even worse than Fly-Away. In addition, probably it is exactly because of its ineffectiveness, Fly-Away was employed years ago. In these cases, if the author can eliminate these possiblities, the argument could be strengthen.
While the conclusion and the whole argument might be plausible, the author should assess the assumptions to substantiate the argument. Had the author considered the possible scenarios to strengthen the assumotions, the argument and the conclusion might have been persuasive.
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 8 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 7 2
No. of Sentences: 20 15
No. of Words: 410 350
No. of Characters: 2039 1500
No. of Different Words: 178 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.5 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.973 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.746 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 151 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 114 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 87 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 58 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 20.5 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.059 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.75 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.354 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.492 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.107 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 367, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'assumptions'' or 'assumption's'?
Suggestion: assumptions'; assumption's
...However, the author should evaluate the assumptions ti establish the argument strongly. ...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 246, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...fferent. For instance, Palm City may be a international port, and the warehouse i...
^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, however, if, may, so, still, then, well, while, for instance, in addition, as a result, on the contrary, to begin with
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 22.0 19.6327345309 112% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 18.0 12.9520958084 139% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 11.1786427146 107% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 13.6137724551 66% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 17.0 28.8173652695 59% => OK
Preposition: 48.0 55.5748502994 86% => OK
Nominalization: 13.0 16.3942115768 79% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2102.0 2260.96107784 93% => OK
No of words: 410.0 441.139720559 93% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.12682926829 5.12650576532 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.49982852243 4.56307096286 99% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.87295953508 2.78398813304 103% => OK
Unique words: 186.0 204.123752495 91% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.453658536585 0.468620217663 97% => OK
syllable_count: 657.0 705.55239521 93% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 4.96107784431 60% => OK
Article: 11.0 8.76447105788 126% => OK
Subordination: 8.0 2.70958083832 295% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 5.0 1.67365269461 299% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 11.0 4.22255489022 261% => Less preposition wanted as sentence beginnings.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 19.7664670659 101% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 22.8473053892 88% => OK
Sentence length SD: 44.2334714894 57.8364921388 76% => OK
Chars per sentence: 105.1 119.503703932 88% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.5 23.324526521 88% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.45 5.70786347227 113% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 5.15768463074 78% => More paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 2.0 5.25449101796 38% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 8.20758483034 61% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 9.0 6.88822355289 131% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.67664670659 128% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.185948357492 0.218282227539 85% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0628248793914 0.0743258471296 85% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0546053386228 0.0701772020484 78% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.114106143315 0.128457276422 89% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0693541135996 0.0628817314937 110% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.0 14.3799401198 90% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 51.18 48.3550499002 106% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 12.197005988 91% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.47 12.5979740519 99% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.02 8.32208582834 96% => OK
difficult_words: 88.0 98.500998004 89% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 12.3882235529 65% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 11.1389221557 90% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.9071856287 109% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.