The following appeared in a memorandum from the owner of Movies Galore a chain of movie rental stores In order to reverse the recent decline in our profits we must reduce operating expenses at Movies Galore s ten movie rental stores Since we are famous fo | TOEFL IELTS GMAT GRE SAT ACT PTE ESL

Essay topics:

The following appeared in a memorandum from the owner of Movies
Galore, a chain of movie-rental stores.
"In order to reverse the recent decline in our profits, we must reduce
operating expenses at Movies Galore's ten movie-rental stores. Since we are
famous for our special bargains, raising our rental prices is not a viable
way to improve profits. Last month our store in downtown Marston
significantly decreased its operating expenses by closing at 6:00 p.m. rather
than 9:00 p.m. and by reducing its stock by eliminating all movies released
more than five years ago. Therefore, in order to increase profits without
jeopardizing our reputation for offering great movies at low prices, we
recommend implementing similar changes in our other nine Movies Galore
stores."
􀀺rite a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be
answered in order to decide whether the recommendation and the argument
on which it is based are reasonable. Be sure to explain how the answers to
these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.

The owner of Movies Galore recommends truncating operating hours and reducing stocks in order to gain mor profits. The author makes a number of unwarranted assumptions in making this recommendation, and if they are proven wrong, could prove costly for the company.

The first question that needs to be answered is what Movies Galore actually famous for? Here author simply stated that Movies Galore wass famous for its special bargains, but how did the author reach this conclusion ? Maybe some survey was done or maybe some customers were asked about what they liked best about Movies Galore - but reagardless, without knowing how they author gleaned this information and the validity of his method, we cannot say for sure that Movies Galore is actually famous for its bargain. Movies Galore might really have amazing prices, but if, for example it was actually its wide movie collection that actually drew customers then the author's recommendation of purging movies more than five years old might cost more in revenue than the amount saved on keeping a lower stock. As such, if the price is not the most vaunted aspect of Movies Galore, then the company might increase profits by raising the price without seriously affecting its reputation.

The author claimed that in its Marston store its operating expense reduced significantly due to some changes in some of the store's policies; however, we do not know whether the profits show a corresponding significant increase as well. If the overall result of those changes was negative, then there's no reason to make similar changes in the other stores. Also, the alteration could certainly reduce operating expenses, nonetheless, their effect on the store's revenue was not mentioned. Closing earlier and reducing the size of its stock could result in losing many customers, whose effect could easily overwhelm the amount saved on operating expenses.

The author also generalized his findings from one store to be applicable to all this other stores. People in Maston might have significantly different movie watching habits than people in other areas. So even if the author's recommendation proved viable in Maston, doesn't mean that it will be the same for the other areas as well. The demographics in other cities are likely to be significantly different. In some areas for example, people might have a predilection for old movies and late night movie-renting; in places such as these the author's recommendation could lead to a major drop in profits.

The author's recommendation therefore needs more incisive analysis before being implemented. The author could also look for other ways to increase profits or reducing operating costs.

Votes

Essay Categories

GMAT/GRE Argument Task

Comments

Essay evaluations by e-grader

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 1, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_BEGINNING_RULE
Message: Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Reword the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
... could prove costly for the company. The first question that needs to be answere...
^^^
Line 3, column 662, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...n that actually drew customers then the authors recommendation of purging movies more t...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 113, Rule ID: SOME_OF_THE[1]
Message: Simply use 'some'.
Suggestion: some
...ed significantly due to some changes in some of the stores policies; however, we do not kno...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 295, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: there's
...ult of those changes was negative, then theres no reason to make similar changes in th...
^^^^^^
Line 5, column 454, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'stores'' or 'store's'?
Suggestion: stores'; store's
...enses, nonetheless, their effect on the stores revenue was not mentioned. Closing ear...
^^^^^^
Line 7, column 217, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...n people in other areas. So even if the authors recommendation proved viable in Maston,...
^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 265, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: doesn't
...recommendation proved viable in Maston, doesnt mean that it will be the same for the o...
^^^^^^
Line 7, column 539, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...ie-renting; in places such as these the authors recommendation could lead to a major dr...
^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 5, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...ead to a major drop in profits. The authors recommendation therefore needs more inc...
^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, also, but, first, however, if, look, may, nonetheless, really, so, then, therefore, well, as for, for example, such as

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 15.0 19.6327345309 76% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 13.0 12.9520958084 100% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 11.1786427146 89% => OK
Relative clauses : 7.0 13.6137724551 51% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 29.0 28.8173652695 101% => OK
Preposition: 41.0 55.5748502994 74% => OK
Nominalization: 11.0 16.3942115768 67% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2260.0 2260.96107784 100% => OK
No of words: 433.0 441.139720559 98% => OK
Chars per words: 5.21939953811 5.12650576532 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.56165014514 4.56307096286 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.69441959392 2.78398813304 97% => OK
Unique words: 228.0 204.123752495 112% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.526558891455 0.468620217663 112% => OK
syllable_count: 708.3 705.55239521 100% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 4.96107784431 60% => OK
Article: 9.0 8.76447105788 103% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.70958083832 111% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.67365269461 179% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 19.7664670659 91% => OK
Sentence length: 24.0 22.8473053892 105% => OK
Sentence length SD: 64.6445408884 57.8364921388 112% => OK
Chars per sentence: 125.555555556 119.503703932 105% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.0555555556 23.324526521 103% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.11111111111 5.70786347227 125% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 9.0 5.25449101796 171% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 8.20758483034 134% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 6.88822355289 29% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.67664670659 107% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.251613788099 0.218282227539 115% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0846025254009 0.0743258471296 114% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0715088068464 0.0701772020484 102% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.130591076127 0.128457276422 102% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.064917150886 0.0628817314937 103% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.2 14.3799401198 106% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 47.12 48.3550499002 97% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.7 12.197005988 104% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.29 12.5979740519 105% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.77 8.32208582834 105% => OK
difficult_words: 108.0 98.500998004 110% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 12.3882235529 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 11.1389221557 104% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.9071856287 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?

---------------------

Rates: 75.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.5 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.

Essay evaluations by e-grader

Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, also, but, first, however, if, look, may, nonetheless, really, so, then, therefore, well, as for, for example, such as

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments