The following appeared in a memorandum written by the vice president of Health Naturally, a small but expanding chain of stores selling health food and other health-related products."Our previous experience has been that our stores are most profitabl

Essay topics:

The following appeared in a memorandum written by the vice president of Health Naturally, a small but expanding chain of stores selling health food and other health-related products.

"Our previous experience has been that our stores are most profitable in areas where residents are highly concerned with leading healthy lives. We should therefore build one of our new stores in Plainsville, which clearly has many such residents. Plainsville merchants report that sales of running shoes and exercise equipment are at all-time highs. The local health club, which nearly closed five years ago due to lack of business, has more members than ever, and the weight-training and aerobics classes are always full. We can even anticipate a new generation of customers: Plainsville's schoolchildren are required to participate in a program called Fitness for Life, which emphasizes the benefits of regular exercise at an early age."

Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.

The argument in the memo believes that opening a new store in areas where people are more concerned with health like Plainsville is profitable. To buttress the argument memo asserts that residents of Plainsville are more into buying exercise equipment and involved in weight training and aerobic classes than ever.However, the argument is filled with series of unwarranted assumptions rendering the conclusion unconvincing as it stands.Several questiones need to be answered before further evaluation of the argument.

First of all,jumping to the conclusion that residents of Plainsville are concerned with health related lives is completely flawed.Generalizing based on increase in sales of shoes and equipment is presumptuous. For instance if the residents of Plainsville are profligate and like to spend money and like to garner new shoes and equipment. They might not be interested in health related products and healthy drinks.Further, the shops might be of small scale and products are cheap and the speaker's shop is large-scale and products are costly which people cannot afford. Information regarding increase in sales of what kind of shops has increased the sales and the economic status of the people in the city will help to decide to open the shop or not.

Secondly,there is a possibility that the stores selling health related products and food are myriad in the city, opening a new store does not earn profits as expected because people have too many options and more over they might have habituated to other stores.Location of the shops that have achieved success should also be considered because a store that is in reachable distance attracts more customers than in the outskirts of the city.A clear report that depicts the location of the shops and the flow of customers to the store will help substantiate his claim.

Further, speaker in a move to substantiate his claim avers that the health club which was nearly closed 5 years ago is now full with patrons.Earlier people might be unaware of the club but now because of boost in advertising and supplanting the equipment with more advanced ones might have increased the flow of patrons.Assuming that since are more concerned with health increase in flow in the club is completely groundless.

In conclusion,speaker's assumptions are way too high rendering a flawed conclusion. A conclusive evidence reporting that how many people are present in the city among which how many are concerned with health. And the reason for the increase in flow of patrons in health club and the stretch and competition the store has to face if opened has to be provided for substantiating his claim.

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Average: 5.5 (3 votes)
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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 315, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: However
... training and aerobic classes than ever.However, the argument is filled with series of ...
^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 437, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Several
...he conclusion unconvincing as it stands.Several questiones need to be answered before f...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 13, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , jumping
...aluation of the argument. First of all,jumping to the conclusion that residents of Pla...
^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 131, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Generalizing
...alth related lives is completely flawed.Generalizing based on increase in sales of shoes and...
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 414, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Further
...lth related products and healthy drinks.Further, the shops might be of small scale and ...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 9, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , there
...cide to open the shop or not. Secondly,there is a possibility that the stores sellin...
^^^^^^
Line 5, column 262, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Location
...y might have habituated to other stores.Location of the shops that have achieved success...
^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 441, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: A
...omers than in the outskirts of the city.A clear report that depicts the location ...
^
Line 7, column 142, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Earlier
...ed 5 years ago is now full with patrons.Earlier people might be unaware of the club but...
^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 321, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Assuming
...ight have increased the flow of patrons.Assuming that since are more concerned with heal...
^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 14, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , speakers
...s completely groundless. In conclusion,speakers assumptions are way too high rendering ...
^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, however, if, regarding, second, secondly, so, as to, for instance, in conclusion, kind of, first of all

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 27.0 19.6327345309 138% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 10.0 12.9520958084 77% => OK
Conjunction : 20.0 11.1786427146 179% => OK
Relative clauses : 14.0 13.6137724551 103% => OK
Pronoun: 16.0 28.8173652695 56% => OK
Preposition: 66.0 55.5748502994 119% => OK
Nominalization: 16.0 16.3942115768 98% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2228.0 2260.96107784 99% => OK
No of words: 431.0 441.139720559 98% => OK
Chars per words: 5.16937354988 5.12650576532 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.55637350225 4.56307096286 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.10391063469 2.78398813304 111% => OK
Unique words: 194.0 204.123752495 95% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.450116009281 0.468620217663 96% => OK
syllable_count: 685.8 705.55239521 97% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 1.0 4.96107784431 20% => OK
Article: 5.0 8.76447105788 57% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 2.70958083832 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.22255489022 47% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 11.0 19.7664670659 56% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 39.0 22.8473053892 171% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 143.752484707 57.8364921388 249% => The lengths of sentences changed so frequently.
Chars per sentence: 202.545454545 119.503703932 169% => OK
Words per sentence: 39.1818181818 23.324526521 168% => OK
Discourse Markers: 11.0 5.70786347227 193% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 11.0 5.25449101796 209% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 8.20758483034 97% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 6.88822355289 15% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.67664670659 43% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.146519656835 0.218282227539 67% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0588015943997 0.0743258471296 79% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.051248591238 0.0701772020484 73% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0883300260259 0.128457276422 69% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.037134801174 0.0628817314937 59% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 22.5 14.3799401198 156% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 31.89 48.3550499002 66% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 7.1628742515 156% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 18.5 12.197005988 152% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.3 12.5979740519 106% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.2 8.32208582834 111% => OK
difficult_words: 99.0 98.500998004 101% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 19.5 12.3882235529 157% => OK
gunning_fog: 17.6 11.1389221557 158% => OK
text_standard: 23.0 11.9071856287 193% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.

Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 12 15
No. of Words: 442 350
No. of Characters: 2192 1500
No. of Different Words: 196 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.585 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.959 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.686 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 157 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 119 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 88 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 57 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 36.833 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 22.308 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.667 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.379 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.644 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.097 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5