The following appeared on the Mozart School of Music Web site.
"The Mozart School of Music should be the first choice for parents considering enrolling their child in music lessons. First of all, the Mozart School welcomes youngsters at all ability and age levels; there is no audition to attend the school. Second, the school offers instruction in nearly all musical instruments as well a wide range of styles and genres from classical to rock. Third, the faculty includes some of the most distinguished musicians in the area. Finally, many Mozart graduates have gone on to become well-known and highly paid professional musicians."
Write a response in which you examine the stated and/or unstated assumptions of the argument. Be sure to explain how the argument depends on these assumptions and what the implications are for the argument if the assumptions prove unwarranted.
The argument claims that the Mozart School of Music should be the primary place where parents consider their child enrolling in music lessons. There are several reasons why Mozart School of music is best: they welcomes younger people at all ability, offers most musical instruments, some faculty members are distinguished musicians in the area, and many Mozart graduates had become famous and highly paid professional musicians. It seems very logical at first glance, but some assertion makes argument invalid as persuasive.
First and foremost, Mozart School of Music welcomes youngsters at all ability and age level. It implies that all ability are more likely to be welcomed by Mozart Schools of Music. However, since they showed that there was no audition to attend the schools, school does not know who is eligible to do classics or who is eligible at rock. There should be specific reasons that how school cope with youngsters at all ability.
Secondly, some faculty members are most distinguished musicians in the area. The writer does not substantiate that if distinguished musicians are good at his area, then he will be the best at teaching. We do not know what area does distinguished musician best at and we do not know how well he teaches by only looking at his career.
Lastly, this argument only showed Mozart graduates will be famous and highly paid professional musicians, but author did not show the evidence that support the idea as well as the definition of ‘many.’ When it talks about many graduates, how many people are having high payment, and how many graduates are going to be famous? There should be specific examples such as Mozart graduates are 200 people and about eighty-five percent of graduates have high payment.
In conclusion, argument is not all wrong from the vision that parents should consider the Mozart School of Music first. However, if author considers and substantiates about unproven assumptions and evidences, the argument will be more likely tenable and valid persuasion.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 211, Rule ID: NON3PRS_VERB[2]
Message: The pronoun 'they' must be used with a non-third-person form of a verb: 'welcome'
Suggestion: welcome
...hy Mozart School of music is best: they welcomes younger people at all ability, offers m...
^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, however, if, lastly, look, second, secondly, so, then, well, in conclusion, such as, as well as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 21.0 19.6327345309 107% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 12.9520958084 54% => OK
Conjunction : 14.0 11.1786427146 125% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 13.6137724551 81% => OK
Pronoun: 20.0 28.8173652695 69% => OK
Preposition: 32.0 55.5748502994 58% => More preposition wanted.
Nominalization: 11.0 16.3942115768 67% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1712.0 2260.96107784 76% => OK
No of words: 331.0 441.139720559 75% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.17220543807 5.12650576532 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.26537283232 4.56307096286 93% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.7108402917 2.78398813304 97% => OK
Unique words: 162.0 204.123752495 79% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.489425981873 0.468620217663 104% => OK
syllable_count: 524.7 705.55239521 74% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 4.96107784431 81% => OK
Interrogative: 2.0 0.471057884232 425% => OK
Article: 3.0 8.76447105788 34% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.70958083832 111% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.67365269461 239% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 2.0 4.22255489022 47% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 14.0 19.7664670659 71% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 23.0 22.8473053892 101% => OK
Sentence length SD: 72.9154178707 57.8364921388 126% => OK
Chars per sentence: 122.285714286 119.503703932 102% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.6428571429 23.324526521 101% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.64285714286 5.70786347227 134% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.25449101796 19% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 8.20758483034 97% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.88822355289 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.67664670659 43% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.44653710124 0.218282227539 205% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.199686570785 0.0743258471296 269% => Sentence topic similarity is high.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.192730663353 0.0701772020484 275% => The coherence between sentences is low.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.267871474743 0.128457276422 209% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.180525839463 0.0628817314937 287% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.7 14.3799401198 102% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 48.13 48.3550499002 100% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.3 12.197005988 101% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.0 12.5979740519 103% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.45 8.32208582834 102% => OK
difficult_words: 77.0 98.500998004 78% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 12.3882235529 89% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 11.1389221557 101% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.9071856287 92% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 54.17 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.25 Out of 6 -- The score is based on the average performance of 20,000 argument essays. This e-grader is not smart enough to check on arguments.
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.