The following appeared as an opinion-editorial in a local newspaper:
In the last 10 years, the number of patrons to the local library has decreased by a factor of 5, while during that time the number of purchases of electronic books has increased by a factor of 10. The director of the library believes that the cause of the decrease in patrons is due to the library not advertising as effectively as do online merchants that sell electronic books. Therefore, the library should double the amount of money that it spends on advertising, so that more patrons will frequent the library.
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered to help evaluate the recommendation, and whether the argument is reasonable. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to determine the extent to which the recommendation is justified.
The director of the library is requesting for an extension is funds allocated for marketing to increase the visitors. but the content is not cogent enough since it is rile with holes.
The director has pointed out the popularity of library books since the its past and perspective patrons have turned to e-books. The first question that need to be answered is that if the softcopies of the books were not available, how many people would have preferred the library. is there any study with firm results to support the believe? it could be the buyers who are purchasing the ebooks are the ones who cannot really visit the library regularly due to hectic schedule, personnel responsibilities. distance constraints or health issues. if this is the case then basis of argument stands weak.
The reason the presented by the letter writer is for the people being attracted to ebooks over library is that the ebook sellers are indulged into better marketing techniques then the library. Thus they are pulling the masses toward soft-form of publications. Assuming it is possible for the clientele of ebooks to go the library otherwise, we need to understand details what has been selling point of these merchants and what is the library’s marketing team plans to tackle once their finances have been increased? what would be selling point of the library membership? how does the library plans to reach to the wider audience in more effective manner? is there a popular medium, such social media, that has not been utilized previously?
The director has requested for doubling the budget of the marketing team. Now increasing funding of a department by two times is a considerable change. The director must present his team’s strategy of utilizing the amount. An elaborated plan of the marketing campaigns must be shared before the authorities to justify the claim.
The decline of visitors to library and increased trend of electronic books can be observed in the society. but before any decision could be taken on the letter the response of the above queries must explored to the depth to understand the exact situation.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 11 15
No. of Words: 353 350
No. of Characters: 1732 1500
No. of Different Words: 192 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.335 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.907 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.605 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 130 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 97 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 68 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 44 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 32.091 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 25.011 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.455 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.354 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.663 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.08 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 119, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: But
...for marketing to increase the visitors. but the content is not cogent enough since ...
^^^
Line 1, column 168, Rule ID: BEEN_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Consider using a past participle here: 'riled'.
Suggestion: riled
...ontent is not cogent enough since it is rile with holes. The director has pointed...
^^^^
Line 3, column 68, Rule ID: DT_PRP[1]
Message: Possible typo. Did you mean 'the' or 'its'?
Suggestion: the; its
...t the popularity of library books since the its past and perspective patrons have turne...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 282, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Is
...eople would have preferred the library. is there any study with firm results to su...
^^
Line 3, column 330, Rule ID: A_INFINITVE[1]
Message: Probably a wrong construction: a/the + infinitive
... any study with firm results to support the believe? it could be the buyers who are purchas...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 334, Rule ID: BELIEVE_BELIEF[1]
Message: Did you mean 'belief' (noun) instead of believe (verb)?
Suggestion: belief
... study with firm results to support the believe? it could be the buyers who are purchas...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 343, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: It
...th firm results to support the believe? it could be the buyers who are purchasing ...
^^
Line 3, column 507, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Distance
...c schedule, personnel responsibilities. distance constraints or health issues. if this i...
^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 546, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: If
... distance constraints or health issues. if this is the case then basis of argument...
^^
Line 3, column 546, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “if” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
... distance constraints or health issues. if this is the case then basis of argument...
^^
Line 5, column 194, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Thus,
... marketing techniques then the library. Thus they are pulling the masses toward soft...
^^^^
Line 5, column 522, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: What
...nce their finances have been increased? what would be selling point of the library m...
^^^^
Line 5, column 577, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: How
...elling point of the library membership? how does the library plans to reach to the ...
^^^
Line 5, column 598, Rule ID: DOES_NP_VBZ[1]
Message: Did you mean 'plan'?
Suggestion: plan
...ibrary membership? how does the library plans to reach to the wider audience in more ...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 661, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Is
...ider audience in more effective manner? is there a popular medium, such social med...
^^
Line 9, column 108, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: But
...c books can be observed in the society. but before any decision could be taken on t...
^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, if, really, so, then, thus
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 28.0 19.6327345309 143% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 11.0 12.9520958084 85% => OK
Conjunction : 6.0 11.1786427146 54% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 6.0 13.6137724551 44% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 14.0 28.8173652695 49% => OK
Preposition: 47.0 55.5748502994 85% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 16.3942115768 37% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1783.0 2260.96107784 79% => OK
No of words: 353.0 441.139720559 80% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.05099150142 5.12650576532 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.33454660006 4.56307096286 95% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.73989964279 2.78398813304 98% => OK
Unique words: 194.0 204.123752495 95% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.549575070822 0.468620217663 117% => OK
syllable_count: 554.4 705.55239521 79% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 4.96107784431 60% => OK
Article: 8.0 8.76447105788 91% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.70958083832 37% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 0.0 4.22255489022 0% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 19.7664670659 101% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 22.8473053892 74% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 53.858147016 57.8364921388 93% => OK
Chars per sentence: 89.15 119.503703932 75% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.65 23.324526521 76% => OK
Discourse Markers: 1.9 5.70786347227 33% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 16.0 5.25449101796 305% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 8.20758483034 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 6.88822355289 15% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 10.0 4.67664670659 214% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.101995972232 0.218282227539 47% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0294081792282 0.0743258471296 40% => Sentence topic similarity is low.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0353580784408 0.0701772020484 50% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.060172236409 0.128457276422 47% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0110798801891 0.0628817314937 18% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.2 14.3799401198 78% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 54.22 48.3550499002 112% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 12.197005988 81% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.71 12.5979740519 93% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.86 8.32208582834 106% => OK
difficult_words: 98.0 98.500998004 99% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 12.3882235529 65% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.8 11.1389221557 79% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.9071856287 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.