The following appeared as part of a business plan developed by the manager of the Rialto Movie Theater.
"Despite its downtown location, the Rialto Movie Theater, a local institution for five decades, must make big changes or close its doors forever. It should follow the example of the new Apex Theater in the mall outside of town. When the Apex opened last year, it featured a video arcade, plush carpeting and seats, and a state-of-the-art sound system. Furthermore, in a recent survey, over 85 percent of respondents reported that the high price of newly released movies prevents them from going to the movies more than five times per year. Thus, if the Rialto intends to hold on to its share of a decreasing pool of moviegoers, it must offer the same features as Apex."
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation is likely to have the predicted result. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.
The author’s argument that the Rialto must offer the same features as Apex to hold its share of moviegoers is flawed for various reasons. In the argument, the author not only draws a strong conclusion based on vague and unwarranted statements, but also tries to concludes to follow Apex without analysing the reasons for the decreasing pool of moviegoers. Furthermore, the author assumes that the Rialto Movie Theatre is similar to the Apex Theatre and the Rialto Movie Theatre can hold its share of moviegoers by following the Apex theatre which is flawed.
First, the author bases his conclusion on many vague and unwarranted statements. For example, when the new Apex theatre was opened last year with a video arcade, plush carpeting and seats, and a state-of-the-art sound system, the author doesn’t consider the magnitude of the response that was received by the Apex theatre. The underlying assumption is that the reaction would not provide any information on the outcome of following the footsteps of Apex. For example, if the response of the Apex theatre is not great, it is incorrect to conclude that Rialto theatre would be able to hold its share of moviegoers by just offering the features as Apex theatre. Furthermore, when 85 percent of respondents reported that the high price of newly released movies prevents them from going to movies more than five times per year in a recent survey, the author makes an assumption that the Rialto can increase its share of moviegoers by following the Apex theatre. The assumption is unwarranted because the author does not cite any evidence or analysis that relates the premise and conclusion. Since the author doesn’t provide any information about the kind of response the Apex theatre had received, analysis or evidence that can relate the survey outcome and his conclusion, it is challenging to draw such a firm conclusion.
Second, the author concludes to follow Apex theatre without analysing the reasons for the decreasing pool of moviegoers. The underlying assumption is that the reason for the decreasing pool of moviegoers would not provide any extra information in analysing the situation which is incorrect. For example, if the reason for decreasing pool of moviegoers is not related to Rialto theatre, it would not help in following the Apex theatre. If the reason for the drop is because of a decrease in the economic conditions of the people or because of the more fascinating tv shows or movies which are telecasted in television which is not related to the Rialto theatre, the author’s assumption is flawed. If the author had provided any information on the reason for the drop in the share of moviegoers, it would have been easy to conclude that Rialto theatre can hold its moviegoers by following the Apex theatre.
Third, the author assumes that the Rialto Movie Theatre is similar to the Apex Theatre irrespective of their localities which is incorrect. For example, the Apex theatre is located inside a mall which can attract more viewers compared to the Rialto Theatre because the viewers can visit the other shops and restaurants in the mall. Also, the climate outside the town can be peaceful compared to the downtown which can drive the moviegoers to prefer Apex theatre which is outside the town compared to the Rialto Theatre which is located in downtown. Since the author had not provided any information that can support his assumption that both the theatres are similar irrespective of their geographical location, it is unwise to draw a firm conclusion based on this assumption.
In conclusion, Because the argument makes several unwarranted assumptions, the author fails to make a convincing case that the Rialto must offer the same features as Apex to hold its share of moviegoers is flawed for various reasons.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 20 15
No. of Words: 632 350
No. of Characters: 3115 1500
No. of Different Words: 201 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 5.014 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.929 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.648 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 229 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 179 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 114 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 76 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 31.6 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.79 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.75 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.446 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.604 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.178 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 268, Rule ID: TO_NON_BASE[1]
Message: The verb after "to" should be in the base form: 'conclude'.
Suggestion: conclude
...warranted statements, but also tries to concludes to follow Apex without analysing the re...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 1298, Rule ID: ALLOW_TO[1]
Message: Did you mean 'drawing'? Or maybe you should add a pronoun? In active voice, 'challenge' + 'to' takes an object, usually a pronoun.
Suggestion: drawing
...e and his conclusion, it is challenging to draw such a firm conclusion. Second, the ...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 463, Rule ID: REASON_IS_BECAUSE[1]
Message: Probably an incorrect phrase. Use 'the reason 'is that''.
Suggestion: is that
...pex theatre. If the reason for the drop is because of a decrease in the economic condition...
^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, furthermore, if, second, so, third, for example, in conclusion, kind of
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 28.0 19.6327345309 143% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 16.0 12.9520958084 124% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 11.1786427146 116% => OK
Relative clauses : 26.0 13.6137724551 191% => OK
Pronoun: 33.0 28.8173652695 115% => OK
Preposition: 73.0 55.5748502994 131% => OK
Nominalization: 20.0 16.3942115768 122% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 3199.0 2260.96107784 141% => OK
No of words: 629.0 441.139720559 143% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.08585055644 5.12650576532 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 5.00798087137 4.56307096286 110% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.80690277134 2.78398813304 101% => OK
Unique words: 210.0 204.123752495 103% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.33386327504 0.468620217663 71% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 992.7 705.55239521 141% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 4.96107784431 101% => OK
Article: 15.0 8.76447105788 171% => OK
Subordination: 9.0 2.70958083832 332% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.22255489022 95% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 19.7664670659 101% => OK
Sentence length: 31.0 22.8473053892 136% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 54.5255903223 57.8364921388 94% => OK
Chars per sentence: 159.95 119.503703932 134% => OK
Words per sentence: 31.45 23.324526521 135% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.45 5.70786347227 78% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.25449101796 57% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 8.20758483034 97% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 6.88822355289 87% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.67664670659 128% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.158673690132 0.218282227539 73% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0683418211338 0.0743258471296 92% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0551729919383 0.0701772020484 79% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.121676064559 0.128457276422 95% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0321291555076 0.0628817314937 51% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 18.3 14.3799401198 127% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 40.01 48.3550499002 83% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 15.4 12.197005988 126% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.83 12.5979740519 102% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.71 8.32208582834 93% => OK
difficult_words: 101.0 98.500998004 103% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 13.5 12.3882235529 109% => OK
gunning_fog: 14.4 11.1389221557 129% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 11.9071856287 118% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Write the essay in 30 minutes.
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.