The following is part of a memorandum from the president of Humana University.
"Last year the number of students who enrolled in online degree programs offered by nearby Omni University increased by 50 percent. During the same year, Omni showed a significant decrease from prior years in expenditures for dormitory and classroom space, most likely because online instruction takes place via the Internet. In contrast, over the past three years, enrollment at Humana University has failed to grow and the cost of maintaining buildings has increased. Thus, to increase enrollment and solve the problem of budget deficits at Humana University, we should initiate and actively promote online degree programs like those at Omni."
In these memo, the president of Humana university recommends to initiate and actively promote online degree programs programs like those at Omni university in order to solve the problem of budget deficits. To bolster the recommendations, the president cites that last year the number of students enrollment at Omni university in online degree programs has increased by 50 percent due to the prior decrease in expenditures for dormitory and classroom space. Similarly he added that mainly study takes place through online instruction through via the Internet. But enrollment at Humana university has failed to grow and the cost of maintaining building has increased. Close scrutiny of each of these facts however none of them lend no credible evidence to support the recommendation.
First, the argument readily assumes that decreasing expenditures for dormitory and classroom space had significantly increased the number of students enrollment in online degrees. However, only considering this as main reason for student enrollment doesn't provide viable reason. Thus, there may be some other reason for the increment of student enrollment. Therefore, the argument fails to mention the chief reason for the increment of students enrollment at Omni university.
Secondly, the argument fails to mention the accurate methodologies applied by Omni university for students enrollment. Hence, considering online instruction providing to the students via the Internet doesn't mainly allure huge number of students to that university. There may be some hidden methods and procedure that may be applied by university to attract large number of students such as low price on enrollment, competitive teaching methodologies, proper job placement and so on. Thus, the argument provide less credible evidence to support the argument.
Finally, the argument fails to mention one of the key factors on the basis of which it could have been evaluated, only maintaining buildings and enrolling high number of students doesn't provide sufficient criteria for any university to improve its image. Thus, to maintain good prestige at the market level, proper qualitative education and practices are needed. Thereby, to attract huge number of students, accurate management and prosperous teaching methods should be there. Hence, the argument remains unsubstantiated and become open to debate.
To sum up, the argument relies on dubious assumptions that renders unconvincing as it stands. To bolster the recommendation, the president of Humana university should provide clear evidence perhaps by a local study or survey: methods and procedures applied by Omni university should be studied properly, new technical procedures for upgrading the quality of education should be underscored and appropriate management and proper teaching faculties should be upgraded.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 19 15
No. of Words: 428 350
No. of Characters: 2365 1500
No. of Different Words: 200 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.548 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.526 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.95 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 201 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 159 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 118 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 74 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 22.526 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 11.627 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.789 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.344 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.554 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.134 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 4, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'this memo' or 'these memos'?
Suggestion: this memo; these memos
In these memo, the president of Humana university rec...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 51, Rule ID: ADMIT_ENJOY_VB[1]
Message: This verb is used with the gerund form: 'recommends initiating'.
Suggestion: recommends initiating
...emo, the president of Humana university recommends to initiate and actively promote online degree prog...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 109, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a word
Suggestion: programs
...iate and actively promote online degree programs programs like those at Omni university in order ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 458, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Similarly,
...ures for dormitory and classroom space. Similarly he added that mainly study takes place ...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 667, Rule ID: CLOSE_SCRUTINY[1]
Message: Use simply 'scrutiny'.
Suggestion: Scrutiny
... of maintaining building has increased. Close scrutiny of each of these facts however none of ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 250, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: doesn't
...s as main reason for student enrollment doesnt provide viable reason. Thus, there may ...
^^^^^^
Line 5, column 201, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: doesn't
...viding to the students via the Internet doesnt mainly allure huge number of students t...
^^^^^^
Line 7, column 180, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: doesn't
...s and enrolling high number of students doesnt provide sufficient criteria for any uni...
^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, finally, first, hence, however, if, may, second, secondly, similarly, so, therefore, thus, such as, to sum up
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 9.0 19.6327345309 46% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 12.9520958084 69% => OK
Conjunction : 15.0 11.1786427146 134% => OK
Relative clauses : 7.0 13.6137724551 51% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 15.0 28.8173652695 52% => OK
Preposition: 62.0 55.5748502994 112% => OK
Nominalization: 33.0 16.3942115768 201% => Less nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2418.0 2260.96107784 107% => OK
No of words: 425.0 441.139720559 96% => OK
Chars per words: 5.68941176471 5.12650576532 111% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.54043259262 4.56307096286 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.00869696704 2.78398813304 108% => OK
Unique words: 209.0 204.123752495 102% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.491764705882 0.468620217663 105% => OK
syllable_count: 767.7 705.55239521 109% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.8 1.59920159681 113% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 0.0 4.96107784431 0% => OK
Article: 10.0 8.76447105788 114% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 2.70958083832 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.22255489022 166% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 19.7664670659 96% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 22.8473053892 96% => OK
Sentence length SD: 77.0133276231 57.8364921388 133% => OK
Chars per sentence: 127.263157895 119.503703932 106% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.3684210526 23.324526521 96% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.0 5.70786347227 105% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 8.0 5.25449101796 152% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 8.20758483034 85% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 9.0 6.88822355289 131% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.67664670659 64% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.245713968653 0.218282227539 113% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0775193436595 0.0743258471296 104% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0903564557478 0.0701772020484 129% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.138328809489 0.128457276422 108% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0923675640201 0.0628817314937 147% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 16.6 14.3799401198 115% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 32.22 48.3550499002 67% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 14.2 12.197005988 116% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 16.02 12.5979740519 127% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.89 8.32208582834 107% => OK
difficult_words: 112.0 98.500998004 114% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 15.0 12.3882235529 121% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 11.1389221557 97% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.9071856287 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.