Book stores are a perfect place for introverts, bibliophiles and knowledge devouring people.
Parley of book collections becomes a crucial factor in determining the success of such a store.
In the preceeding letter to the business manager of the Monarch Books, the author recommends
opening an in-store cafe, supplanting the children's section of the store. Though the argument
may have merit, it relies on questionable premises and assumptions, lacking proper evidentiary
support for the claims made therein. Based on the documentation provided, the thesis seems invalid.
The author's argument is based on unfounded assumptions without proper warrants. His suggestion to
cut competition from the nearby bookstore Book and Bean by opening a cafe has been derived from the
fact that they did so. Their performance goes completely unmentioned. If in-store cafe going in substantial
losses is not uncommon, this is a poor recommendation. The urgent needs for the Monarch stores to
make sudden changes is also unclear. Store seems to have a good brand name, a reader-friendly atmosphere
and a wide collection of books. Furthermore, exchanging the children's section of the store is
limiting the eclectic collection of the store, which seems to be unpromising. The children section
having undergoing significant losses might call for further actions, but such an indiciation is
absent in the argument. Moreover, the establishment cost of the cafe, and the recurring cost has not
been mentioned as well. The profit statement of the cafe versus that of the children section needs to
be compared before making any decision. Also, the financial status of the bookstore needs to be
verified before opening up a new venture. It would be economic harakiri if the store decides to go
for the cafe plan and is already caught in a large debt, or is making significant losses off lately.
As a support, the speaker talks of the recent national consensus which suggested the decline in the
younger strata of the population. Proper quantification is needed before drawing any inferences out
of this statistical study. Not only that, but, this is in no way implies that the population local
to the bookstore or the reading circle shows the same trend.
Establishing the cafe might pose a few problems for the Monarch bookstore. The neighboring bookstore
already has one cafe. Imitating this idea has implementational issues as well as other ramifications.
It will take some time for this new business to settle. More importantly, it will indicate an imitation of
the nearby store which might have a dampening effect on the image of the Monarch bookstore.
In sum, the speaker's illogical stance on the issue is unlikely to draw large attention. In order to
reinforce the claim, he must explicate the underlying assumptions, provide substantiary evidence,
fix logical flaws in the argument and then, draw a coherent implication. Without these remedies, the
above surmise is likely to convince few people.
Essay evaluation report
Sentence: The children section having undergoing significant losses might call for further actions, but such an indiciation is absent in the argument.
Error: indiciation Suggestion: indication
Sentence: It would be economic harakiri if the store decides to go for the cafe plan and is already caught in a large debt, or is making significant losses off lately.
Error: harakiri Suggestion: hair
Sentence: Imitating this idea has implementational issues as well as other ramifications.
Error: implementational Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: In order to reinforce the claim, he must explicate the underlying assumptions, provide substantiary evidence, fix logical flaws in the argument and then, draw a coherent implication.
Error: substantiary Suggestion: No alternate word
--------------------
flaws:
the arguments are not well organized. see a sample:
https://www.testbig.com/gmatgre-argument-task-essays/following-recommen…
--------------------
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 4 2
No. of Sentences: 28 15
No. of Words: 479 350
No. of Characters: 2449 1500
No. of Different Words: 261 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.678 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.113 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.935 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 185 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 142 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 101 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 70 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 17.107 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.411 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.429 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.252 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.435 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.064 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 93, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...the Monarch Books, the author recommends opening an in-store cafe, supplanting th...
^^^
Line 4, column 94, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ection of the store. Though the argument may have merit, it relies on questionabl...
^^^
Line 5, column 95, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... assumptions, lacking proper evidentiary support for the claims made therein. Bas...
^^^
Line 8, column 5, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...vided, the thesis seems invalid. The authors argument is based on unfounded assumpti...
^^^^^^^
Line 8, column 98, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...thout proper warrants. His suggestion to cut competition from the nearby bookstor...
^^^
Line 9, column 100, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...opening a cafe has been derived from the fact that they did so. Their performance...
^^^
Line 10, column 108, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...d. If in-store cafe going in substantial losses is not uncommon, this is a poor r...
^^^
Line 11, column 98, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...e urgent needs for the Monarch stores to make sudden changes is also unclear. Sto...
^^^
Line 12, column 105, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...brand name, a reader-friendly atmosphere and a wide collection of books. Furtherm...
^^^
Line 13, column 94, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ng the childrens section of the store is limiting the eclectic collection of the ...
^^^
Line 14, column 99, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... to be unpromising. The children section having undergoing significant losses mig...
^^^
Line 15, column 96, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ther actions, but such an indiciation is absent in the argument. Moreover, the es...
^^^
Line 16, column 101, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...the cafe, and the recurring cost has not been mentioned as well. The profit state...
^^^
Line 17, column 102, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...us that of the children section needs to be compared before making any decision. ...
^^^
Line 18, column 96, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...cial status of the bookstore needs to be verified before opening up a new venture...
^^^
Line 19, column 99, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...omic harakiri if the store decides to go for the cafe plan and is already caught ...
^^^
Line 22, column 100, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ensus which suggested the decline in the younger strata of the population. Proper...
^^^
Line 23, column 100, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...needed before drawing any inferences out of this statistical study. Not only that...
^^^
Line 24, column 99, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...no way implies that the population local to the bookstore or the reading circle s...
^^^
Line 27, column 101, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...rch bookstore. The neighboring bookstore already has one cafe. Imitating this ide...
^^^
Line 29, column 107, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...tantly, it will indicate an imitation of the nearby store which might have a damp...
^^^
Line 32, column 100, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ely to draw large attention. In order to reinforce the claim, he must explicate t...
^^^
Line 33, column 98, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...umptions, provide substantiary evidence, fix logical flaws in the argument and th...
^^^
Line 34, column 101, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...implication. Without these remedies, the above surmise is likely to convince few ...
^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, furthermore, if, may, moreover, so, then, well, as well as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 19.0 19.6327345309 97% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 12.9520958084 62% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 11.1786427146 89% => OK
Relative clauses : 7.0 13.6137724551 51% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 18.0 28.8173652695 62% => OK
Preposition: 58.0 55.5748502994 104% => OK
Nominalization: 25.0 16.3942115768 152% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2566.0 2260.96107784 113% => OK
No of words: 479.0 441.139720559 109% => OK
Chars per words: 5.35699373695 5.12650576532 104% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.67825486995 4.56307096286 103% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.01106233708 2.78398813304 108% => OK
Unique words: 262.0 204.123752495 128% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.546972860125 0.468620217663 117% => OK
syllable_count: 783.9 705.55239521 111% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 9.0 4.96107784431 181% => OK
Article: 14.0 8.76447105788 160% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.70958083832 111% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.67365269461 239% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 7.0 4.22255489022 166% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 28.0 19.7664670659 142% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 22.8473053892 74% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 37.4017590714 57.8364921388 65% => OK
Chars per sentence: 91.6428571429 119.503703932 77% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.1071428571 23.324526521 73% => OK
Discourse Markers: 2.46428571429 5.70786347227 43% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 31.0 5.15768463074 601% => Less paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 24.0 5.25449101796 457% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 8.20758483034 134% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 9.0 6.88822355289 131% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 8.0 4.67664670659 171% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.215900147359 0.218282227539 99% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0506148047338 0.0743258471296 68% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0571965807042 0.0701772020484 82% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0507190317151 0.128457276422 39% => Maybe some paragraphs are off the topic.
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0570812144833 0.0628817314937 91% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.4 14.3799401198 86% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 54.22 48.3550499002 112% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 12.197005988 81% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.51 12.5979740519 107% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.0 8.32208582834 108% => OK
difficult_words: 137.0 98.500998004 139% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 7.0 12.3882235529 57% => Linsear_write_formula is low.
gunning_fog: 8.8 11.1389221557 79% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.9071856287 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Maximum six paragraphs wanted.
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.