Nature's Way, a chain of stores selling health food and other health-related products, is opening its next franchise in the town of Plainsville. The store should prove to be very successful: Nature's Way franchises tend to be most profitable in areas where residents lead healthy lives, and clearly Plainsville is such an area. Plainsville merchants report that sales of running shoes and exercise clothing are at all-time highs. The local health club has more members than ever, and the weight training and aerobics classes are always full. Finally, Plainsville's schoolchildren represent a new generation of potential customers: these schoolchildren are required to participate in a fitness-for-life program, which emphasizes the benefits of regular exercise at an early age.
Write a response in which you examine the stated and/or unstated assumptions of the argument. Be sure to explain how the argument depends on these assumptions and what the implications are for the argument if the assumptions prove unwarranted.
The author claims that Plainsville has health-conscious citizens who actively indulge in fitness activities and hence Nature's Way store will be highly successful. The statement mentions that the sales of running shoes and exercise clothes are very high, there are numerous health clubs with aerobics and weight training classes. The statement also says that school children are also a potential market since they have to participate in a fitness-for-life program. While all this leads to the assumption that the store will be highly successful in the city of Plainsville, the statement has a number of loopholes. A deeper introspection in the topic will allow the reader to reach any conclusion.
The argument claims that the sales of running shoes and exercise clothing are at all-time highs. It is possible that the city of Plainsville provides cheaper and more variety of these goods hence people from other cities tend to flock here to purchase them. The statement has not provided any details on if the sales have been always been high, or recent times have seen a higher number of purchases. It is possible that the merchants are talking in a relative term. The sales of the other goods are lower than usual hence they find decent sales of running shoes and exercise clothing higher. In order to prove that the residents of the city of Plainsville lead healthy lives, it is necessary that the author provide details with statistics regarding the sales of these goods to the residents of the city. The author should also mention about the buying capacity of the residents. Do people prefer buying food and health-related products from stores or local markets? Are there any pre-existing stores selling the items that the store wishes to target? What is the growth trajectory of the pre-existing stores?
The statement also mentioned the health clubs. According to the author, the clubs have more members than ever, and the weight training and aerobics classes are always full. To prove that the residents of Plainsville are health conscious, the author must present the numbers of members throughout the year and not just a particular season. It is possible that a higher number of members are due to the holidays and extended weekends. The argument needs to mention the activities the members of these clubs indulge in. There is a high possibility that the clubs are more likely to be leisure centers or amusement parks or meet and greet places. The argument needs to provide certain evidence regarding the health of the citizens to strengthen its claims such as average weight, numbers relating to malnutrition, etc. Full aerobics classes can be an indication of an obese society. Instead of providing details regarding the aerobics classes, the argument must mention about health index of the city from a case study.
Another aspect that the statement has mentioned is school children being a potential market to increase the sales of the stores. The statement mentions that school children are required to participate in a fitness-for-life challenge. In order to tap this new market, the store needs to study the challenge completely and cater to the needs of these children. The store can go one step further and collaborate with schools to provide goodies at discounted prices. This will surely give the store an upper hand.
Although the statement has mentioned numerous points to support the argument that the store will do great profit in the city of Plainsville, it needs to provide additional information. If the author can provide a statistical analysis of the health of the citizens it will further strengthen the argument. Nevertheless, the statement should incorporate answers to the above questions in order to support the cause.
Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 7 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 7 2
No. of Sentences: 31 15
No. of Words: 616 350
No. of Characters: 3088 1500
No. of Different Words: 246 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.982 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.013 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.682 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 230 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 169 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 119 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 70 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 19.871 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.404 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.419 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.288 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.452 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.082 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 330, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_BEGINNING_RULE
Message: Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Reword the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
...h aerobics and weight training classes. The statement also says that school childre...
^^^
Line 3, column 318, Rule ID: ADVERB_WORD_ORDER[8]
Message: The adverb 'always' is usually put between 'have' and 'been'.
Suggestion: have always been
...ot provided any details on if the sales have been always been high, or recent times have seen a ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 1017, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...th index of the city from a case study. Another aspect that the statement has me...
^^^^^
Line 9, column 186, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “If” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...eeds to provide additional information. If the author can provide a statistical an...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, hence, if, nevertheless, regarding, so, then, while, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 26.0 19.6327345309 132% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 13.0 12.9520958084 100% => OK
Conjunction : 18.0 11.1786427146 161% => OK
Relative clauses : 17.0 13.6137724551 125% => OK
Pronoun: 33.0 28.8173652695 115% => OK
Preposition: 82.0 55.5748502994 148% => OK
Nominalization: 25.0 16.3942115768 152% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 3151.0 2260.96107784 139% => OK
No of words: 616.0 441.139720559 140% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.11525974026 5.12650576532 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.98190197535 4.56307096286 109% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.7400284378 2.78398813304 98% => OK
Unique words: 255.0 204.123752495 125% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.413961038961 0.468620217663 88% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 960.3 705.55239521 136% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 4.96107784431 121% => OK
Article: 19.0 8.76447105788 217% => Less articles wanted as sentence beginning.
Subordination: 3.0 2.70958083832 111% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.22255489022 118% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 32.0 19.7664670659 162% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 22.8473053892 83% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 41.2813209689 57.8364921388 71% => OK
Chars per sentence: 98.46875 119.503703932 82% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.25 23.324526521 83% => OK
Discourse Markers: 2.0625 5.70786347227 36% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.25449101796 76% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 17.0 8.20758483034 207% => Less positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 6.88822355289 73% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 10.0 4.67664670659 214% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.193380734818 0.218282227539 89% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0503696455686 0.0743258471296 68% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0510934958319 0.0701772020484 73% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.107167549371 0.128457276422 83% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0374580949785 0.0628817314937 60% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.3 14.3799401198 86% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 52.19 48.3550499002 108% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 12.197005988 88% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.42 12.5979740519 99% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.99 8.32208582834 96% => OK
difficult_words: 133.0 98.500998004 135% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 12.3882235529 89% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 11.1389221557 86% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.9071856287 92% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Write the essay in 30 minutes.
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.