Several recent studies have shown a link between health and stair usage. One recently completed study shows that people who live in stairs-only apartment buildings (that is, buildings without elevators) live an average of three years longer than do people who live in buildings with both elevators and stairs. A second study shows that elderly residents of buildings with elevators make, on average, twice as many visits to doctors each year as do residents of buildings without elevators. Furthermore, several doctor's offices are reporting that residents of stairs-only buildings scored higher than average on questionnaires administered to new patients, in which the patients were asked to rate several aspects of their own health (e.g., fitness, sleep quality, susceptibility to injury, etc.). The clearest explanation for these findings is that the moderate daily exercise required of residents who must use the stairs instead of elevators increases people's health and longevity.
Write a response in which you discuss one or more alternative explanations that could rival the proposed explanation and explain how your explanation(s) can plausibly account for the facts presented in the argument.
Here, the author advocated that, moderate everyday exercise in the form of taking stairs instead of elevators, are required for citizens to increase their health as well as longevity. This statement is supported by several studies on different levels, like studying of apartments, or surveys taken by doctors. However, before accepting any claims, some questions must be answered.
First of all, study undertaken is fully reliable? Is it sample's are trustworthy? What if the people who are involved in study as a sample, are rather of a young age? For example, the people who lived in the apartment only with the stairs are on an average younger than the individuals having stairs as well as escalators. If this is the case, than it is obvious that the survey is unreliable. What if the residents from the apartment with staircase are free from any acute or chronic illnesses? On the other hand What if the half of the people with both facilities in their residents may suffer from incurable diseases? If either of these scenarioes has merit, than conclusion drawn in the argument will fall apart.
Moreover, focussing on the second study, which tells that the people, who are living with elevator in the apartment are visiting twice as per their counterpart. But this claim is baseless. For example, a person lived with both amenitis, but what if he or she might never utilizes the escalator and uses stairs? So, on this point, the assertation that the study shows are wrong.
There are some other questions weaken the claim of being healthy in terms of using stairs. Such as, What if the apartment, which is study for stairs were way too short(may be have only 2-3 floors)? Furthermore to enlightnning the third study, which is depends upon filling of questionaries. The residents from apartment having both (stairs & escalators), are illiterate? If this would be true than this people can fill the form, and may choose the wrong answers regarding their health? If above is true than the argument do not hold water.
In conclusion, the argument as it stands now, is considerably flawed, due to its reliance on several unwarranted assumptions. If the author is able to answer the above questions, then it will be possible to accept the author's claim about health and longevity of an individuals, mostly relying on the presence of stairs in their apartment.
Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 23 15
No. of Words: 397 350
No. of Characters: 1901 1500
No. of Different Words: 206 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.464 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.788 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.546 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 131 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 91 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 73 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 47 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 17.261 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.697 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.826 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.266 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.373 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.054 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 3 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 21, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... must be answered. First of all, study undertaken is fully reliable? Is it samp...
^^
Line 2, column 345, Rule ID: COMMA_THAN[1]
Message: Did you mean 'then'?
Suggestion: then
...ell as escalators. If this is the case, than it is obvious that the survey is unreli...
^^^^
Line 2, column 663, Rule ID: COMMA_THAN[1]
Message: Did you mean 'then'?
Suggestion: then
...f either of these scenarioes has merit, than conclusion drawn in the argument will f...
^^^^
Line 3, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...rawn in the argument will fall apart. Moreover, focussing on the second study,...
^^
Line 4, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ation that the study shows are wrong. There are some other questions weaken th...
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 209, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Furthermore,
...y too shortmay be have only 2-3 floors? Furthermore to enlightnning the third study, which ...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 407, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[1]
Message: Did you mean 'these'?
Suggestion: these
... illiterate? If this would be true than this people can fill the form, and may choos...
^^^^
Line 4, column 495, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “If” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...e wrong answers regarding their health? If above is true than the argument do not ...
^^
Line 5, column 263, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[1]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'an individual' or simply 'individuals'?
Suggestion: an individual; individuals
...ors claim about health and longevity of an individuals, mostly relying on the presence of stai...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 340, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... presence of stairs in their apartment.
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, furthermore, however, if, may, moreover, regarding, second, so, then, third, well, for example, in conclusion, such as, as well as, first of all, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 29.0 19.6327345309 148% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 12.9520958084 62% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 11.1786427146 72% => OK
Relative clauses : 10.0 13.6137724551 73% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 23.0 28.8173652695 80% => OK
Preposition: 51.0 55.5748502994 92% => OK
Nominalization: 13.0 16.3942115768 79% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1965.0 2260.96107784 87% => OK
No of words: 397.0 441.139720559 90% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.94962216625 5.12650576532 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.46372701284 4.56307096286 98% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.67895758026 2.78398813304 96% => OK
Unique words: 214.0 204.123752495 105% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.539042821159 0.468620217663 115% => OK
syllable_count: 600.3 705.55239521 85% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 1.0 4.96107784431 20% => OK
Article: 6.0 8.76447105788 68% => OK
Subordination: 8.0 2.70958083832 295% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 4.0 1.67365269461 239% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 5.0 4.22255489022 118% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 23.0 19.7664670659 116% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 22.8473053892 74% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 45.3833492946 57.8364921388 78% => OK
Chars per sentence: 85.4347826087 119.503703932 71% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.2608695652 23.324526521 74% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.60869565217 5.70786347227 133% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 10.0 5.25449101796 190% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 8.20758483034 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 6.88822355289 73% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 9.0 4.67664670659 192% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.272562885421 0.218282227539 125% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0703849227026 0.0743258471296 95% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0761785810257 0.0701772020484 109% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.142242450718 0.128457276422 111% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0640976465896 0.0628817314937 102% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.5 14.3799401198 73% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 62.68 48.3550499002 130% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.7 12.197005988 71% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.13 12.5979740519 88% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.94 8.32208582834 95% => OK
difficult_words: 87.0 98.500998004 88% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 7.0 12.3882235529 57% => Linsear_write_formula is low.
gunning_fog: 8.8 11.1389221557 79% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.9071856287 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 75.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.5 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.