The vice president of human resources at Climpson Industries sent the following recommendation to the company's president.
"A recent national survey found that the majority of workers with access to the Internet at work had used company computers for personal or recreational activities, such as banking or playing games. In an effort to improve our employees' productivity, we should implement electronic monitoring of employees' Internet use from their workstations. Using electronic monitoring software is the best way to reduce the number of hours Climpson employees spend on personal or recreational activities. We predict that installing software to monitor employees' Internet use will allow us to prevent employees from wasting time, thereby increasing productivity and improving overall profits."
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the prediction and the argument on which it is based are reasonable. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the prediction.
The vice president of human resources at Climpson Industries argues that installing a software that monitors of employees would result in the increase of productivity and improving overall profits. Although the author provides valid reasonings that supports their position, they fail to address important questions that leaves some uncertainties in their argument. The author should take into account the program having an opposite effect on productivity and profits and should consider other possibilities that employees can do that would decrease productivity.
Firstly, the author should consider the program having an opposite effect on employee productivity and profits. For example, depending on the type of business Climpson Industries is, the use of social media websites is an important factor in its profit. A more specific example is Instagram. Although it is a social media program, it can be used for advertising. If the website is blocked, then profits would decline due to the lack of advertising for Climpson’s products. Also, monitoring employees’ internet use would decrease their productivity instead of improving them. For instance, employees need breaks every once in awhile from their work. If their activities are being monitored, they would feel pressured and lack in their work.
Furthermore, the author should consider other possibilities that employees can do that would decrease productivity. Although employees are being monitored, there are other means that they can use to slack off. For instance, using their phones or personal laptops. If they have their own internet and use hotspot, the monitoring program would not be of use.
The author mentions how workers use the internet at work for personal activities. Although sometimes it can be a distraction, the author fails to consider that these personal activities are important for the company. For instance, emailing between other companies. These emails should not be monitored due to privacy reasons.
Although the author makes valid points in their recommendation, they fail to consider the opposite effects of the installation of internet monitoring programs and the other possibilities of how employees’ productivity are low. As it stands currently, the author’s argument is flawed and insubstantial.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: ??? out of 6
Category: Poor Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 21 15
No. of Words: 348 350
No. of Characters: 1900 1500
No. of Different Words: 154 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.319 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.46 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.88 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 154 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 124 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 98 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 53 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 16.571 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.346 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.476 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.315 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.495 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.095 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 636, Rule ID: FOR_AWHILE[1]
Message: Did you mean 'a while'?
Suggestion: a while
...ce, employees need breaks every once in awhile from their work. If their activities ar...
^^^^^^
Line 17, column 313, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...s argument is flawed and insubstantial.
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, first, firstly, furthermore, if, so, then, while, for example, for instance
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 17.0 19.6327345309 87% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 18.0 12.9520958084 139% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 11.1786427146 81% => OK
Relative clauses : 10.0 13.6137724551 73% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 32.0 28.8173652695 111% => OK
Preposition: 35.0 55.5748502994 63% => OK
Nominalization: 9.0 16.3942115768 55% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1987.0 2260.96107784 88% => OK
No of words: 348.0 441.139720559 79% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.70977011494 5.12650576532 111% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.31911543099 4.56307096286 95% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.10585262334 2.78398813304 112% => OK
Unique words: 162.0 204.123752495 79% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.465517241379 0.468620217663 99% => OK
syllable_count: 598.5 705.55239521 85% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59920159681 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 4.96107784431 101% => OK
Article: 10.0 8.76447105788 114% => OK
Subordination: 9.0 2.70958083832 332% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 0.0 4.22255489022 0% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 19.7664670659 106% => OK
Sentence length: 16.0 22.8473053892 70% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 51.3233491483 57.8364921388 89% => OK
Chars per sentence: 94.619047619 119.503703932 79% => OK
Words per sentence: 16.5714285714 23.324526521 71% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.85714285714 5.70786347227 68% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.25449101796 38% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 8.20758483034 61% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 6.88822355289 87% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 10.0 4.67664670659 214% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.0961766526744 0.218282227539 44% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0369134563716 0.0743258471296 50% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0556759940827 0.0701772020484 79% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.062432624473 0.128457276422 49% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0262320120476 0.0628817314937 42% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.7 14.3799401198 95% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 46.78 48.3550499002 97% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 12.197005988 88% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 15.54 12.5979740519 123% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.42 8.32208582834 101% => OK
difficult_words: 88.0 98.500998004 89% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 12.3882235529 89% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.4 11.1389221557 75% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.9071856287 92% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.