The vice president of human resources at Climpson Industries sent the following recommendation to the company s president In an effort to improve our employees productivity we should implement electronic monitoring of employees Internet use from their wor

In the recommendation, the vice president claims that in order to enhance the productivity of employees, the company should install electronic monitoring software, so that workers won’t waste time on something unrelated to work. However, a careful examination of this argument would reveal how groundless the conclusion is, for it is based on oversimplified and unwarranted assumptions.

To begin with, the argument relies on the assumption that if employees do not watch videos or facebook, they will focus on their work. Indeed, this software will truly make workers spend less time on recreational activities on their computer. The real picture of this argument, however, is that nowadays every person has their own smartphone or tablet. Employees can still spend time on scrolling their smartphone at the restroom, or even at their seat. Unless the company can install real monitors to supervise the movement of every workers. This would not be possible that staff would not waste their time.

In addition, the vice president assumes that increasing the working hours of their employees will improve the company’s profit. Nevertheless, there are lots of jobs require creativity. If they cannot spend time on search data or watch youtube to find some ideas, they probably can’t have the best idea which can make lots of money for the company. For example, one of the best tech company such as Google, there are lots of recreational amenity such as slide or video game in the office. The president thought that spending some time on playing can increase the efficiency of their workers. In such a case, the author’s assertion to increase profits is hasty and porous.

Third, the rule that the vise president set do not clearly define the meaning of recreational activity on internet. The software may presume the certain websites as playing, but those websites may contain important tutorial for workers to learn. For example, if the engineers are searching and watching some programming rules on youtube or finding other’s tutorials on blog, they will probably get fine because the software presume all youtube or blogs as recreational activities. This policy may cause lots of conflict and lowering the probability for workers to learning new things, and finally decrease the profits of company.

In sum, the argument is not completely sound. The assumptions in support of the conclusion is not solid enough to prove the conclusion—that the policy will improve the profits of the corporation—because It failed to address the several points I have raised. If the vice presidents enroll this policy, the company will face that employees may playing game at smartphone, that lower the creative thinking of them, that cause conflict between workers and boss.

Votes
Average: 6 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 21 15
No. of Words: 448 350
No. of Characters: 2264 1500
No. of Different Words: 217 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.601 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.054 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.636 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 165 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 139 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 86 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 51 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 21.333 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.487 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.667 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.28 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.502 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.04 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5