The best way for a society to prepare its young people for leadership in government, industry, or other fields is by instilling in them a sense of cooperation, not competition.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim. In developing and supporting your position, be sure to address the most compelling reasons or examples that could be used to challenge your position.
Leadership is a very much valued competence in today’s society. Whether if you are a student trying to apply for a university or a young worker looking for a job, you are required to give examples to demonstrate your abilities of leadership. Even regarding one’s privet life, he or she would want to be in a leadership position, essentially to have a sense of control and to be the one who makes decisions regarding his or her own life. Then the question arises, how can we prepare own young people for leadership, through a sense of cooperation or competition?
While competition is an essential part of human nature and had most of the time, stimulates us to work harder and become a better self, it has also inevitably caused many undesired consequences. For example, both the first and second world war took place because the nations were focus on competition rather than cooperation. And as a result, numerous innocent people had lost their families and lives, and the effects are still present today. Today, although the leaders of different countries still tend to compete with each other on various levels, such as political systems and economical growth, they emphasize more on cooperation, forming joint organizations such as WTO and the United Nations, and together aiming for a win-win situation.
One person’s strength may be minimal, however, if we gather a group of people, then together they allow us to explore from the deepest sea to the enormous universe, to talk to people on other side of the world and to arrive there in less than a day. Imagine if everyone only focus on competing with others and therefore not willing to share their knowledge, then the humankind will still live in a rudimentary lifestyle deep in the jungle or up in a cave. Cooperation is what makes us better and stronger, as Steve Jobs would not come up with iphone if he did not work with a group of developers; NASA would not build spacecrafts if each and every engineer decided to do it on their own. One person may come up with a brilliant idea, but a group’s effort is needed to fulfill it.
Competition is part of the human nature while cooperation needs to be taught and learned. Therefore, to prepare an individual for leadership in government, industry, or other fields, it is better to instill them a sense of cooperation.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 583, Rule ID: ECONOMICAL_ECONOMIC[1]
Message: Did you mean 'economic' (=connected with economy)?
Suggestion: economic
...s levels, such as political systems and economical growth, they emphasize more on cooperat...
^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, however, if, look, may, regarding, second, so, still, then, therefore, while, for example, such as, as a result
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 14.0 19.5258426966 72% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 12.4196629213 56% => OK
Conjunction : 22.0 14.8657303371 148% => OK
Relative clauses : 1.0 11.3162921348 9% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 23.0 33.0505617978 70% => OK
Preposition: 57.0 58.6224719101 97% => OK
Nominalization: 15.0 12.9106741573 116% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1953.0 2235.4752809 87% => OK
No of words: 403.0 442.535393258 91% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.84615384615 5.05705443957 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.48049772903 4.55969084622 98% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.86348271814 2.79657885939 102% => OK
Unique words: 229.0 215.323595506 106% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.5682382134 0.4932671777 115% => OK
syllable_count: 627.3 704.065955056 89% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59117977528 101% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 6.24550561798 80% => OK
Article: 0.0 4.99550561798 0% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.10617977528 129% => OK
Conjunction: 5.0 1.77640449438 281% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 3.0 4.38483146067 68% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 14.0 20.2370786517 69% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 28.0 23.0359550562 122% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 65.4879643094 60.3974514979 108% => OK
Chars per sentence: 139.5 118.986275619 117% => OK
Words per sentence: 28.7857142857 23.4991977007 122% => OK
Discourse Markers: 9.21428571429 5.21951772744 177% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 7.80617977528 13% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 10.2758426966 97% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 5.13820224719 39% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.83258426966 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.193589613262 0.243740707755 79% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0714261674481 0.0831039109588 86% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0944078369474 0.0758088955206 125% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.134133018179 0.150359130593 89% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0852961745064 0.0667264976115 128% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.8 14.1392134831 112% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 43.06 48.8420337079 88% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 14.2 12.1743820225 117% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.44 12.1639044944 94% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.18 8.38706741573 109% => OK
difficult_words: 106.0 100.480337079 105% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 11.8971910112 118% => OK
gunning_fog: 13.2 11.2143820225 118% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 11.7820224719 119% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.
Rates: 75.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.5 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.