Governments should invest as much in the arts as they do in the military.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the recommendation and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, describe specific circumstances in which adopting the recommendation would or would not be advantageous and explain how these examples shape your position.
This topic raises the controversial issues of whether government should allocate more funds to arts as much as they do in the military. Indisputably, arts sector is one of the major sectors that should not be given less attention. Nevertheless, the importance and impact of the armed forces cannot be compare with the art sector. Thus, I generally disagree with the opinion that arts should be funded like the military and would argue that it should not. To bolster my viewpoint, I would illustrate with examples in subsequent paragraphs.
First of all, the military is the protector of the country borders, I would like to point out that without the military the country will be vulnerable to war, illegal smuggling of contraband goods. To illustrate, let us look at the example in 2005 Nigeria government declared the importation of rice as contraband. And the group of men were caught in 2006 smuggling over 1000 bags of rice into the country from Senegal. In this circumstance, obviously without the presence of the military the country it would have been an easy access for the smugglers. Consequently, it is pretty obvious that military should be invested on more than arts.
Admittedly, arts sector is the mother of entertainment in any country. This is true especially when it comes to music, film e.t.c. In addition, this sector helps the depressed to laugh out their depression. However, the above argument does not constitute a sufficient support to claim that it should be funded as much as the military is funded. Because the music or the film industry stars can not protect the country in time of war.
In conclusion, although arts should be invested on but not as much as military. As long as some measurements are performed or some areas are involved military should remain the most invested on in order to be war free.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 521, Rule ID: A_UNCOUNTABLE[3]
Message: Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply 'easy access'.
Suggestion: easy access
...military the country it would have been an easy access for the smugglers. Consequently, it is ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, consequently, first, however, look, nevertheless, so, thus, in addition, in conclusion, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 18.0 19.5258426966 92% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 15.0 12.4196629213 121% => OK
Conjunction : 6.0 14.8657303371 40% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 7.0 11.3162921348 62% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 22.0 33.0505617978 67% => OK
Preposition: 48.0 58.6224719101 82% => OK
Nominalization: 10.0 12.9106741573 77% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1535.0 2235.4752809 69% => OK
No of words: 312.0 442.535393258 71% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.91987179487 5.05705443957 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.20279927342 4.55969084622 92% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.78510518606 2.79657885939 100% => OK
Unique words: 170.0 215.323595506 79% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.544871794872 0.4932671777 110% => OK
syllable_count: 468.0 704.065955056 66% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59117977528 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 6.24550561798 112% => OK
Article: 3.0 4.99550561798 60% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.10617977528 97% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.77640449438 56% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.38483146067 114% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 16.0 20.2370786517 79% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 19.0 23.0359550562 82% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 31.3008960535 60.3974514979 52% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 95.9375 118.986275619 81% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.5 23.4991977007 83% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.5625 5.21951772744 126% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 7.80617977528 13% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 10.2758426966 49% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 5.13820224719 136% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.83258426966 83% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.132353021021 0.243740707755 54% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0515796265841 0.0831039109588 62% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0556278562634 0.0758088955206 73% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0870991911325 0.150359130593 58% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0558121838192 0.0667264976115 84% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.5 14.1392134831 81% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 60.65 48.8420337079 124% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.5 12.1743820225 78% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.26 12.1639044944 93% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.22 8.38706741573 98% => OK
difficult_words: 72.0 100.480337079 72% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 11.8971910112 71% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 11.2143820225 86% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.7820224719 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.