Issue 8.
Claim: In any field – business, politics, education, government – those in power should step down after five years.
Reason: The surest path to success for any enterprise is revitalization through new leadership.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim and the reason on which that claim is based.
It is debatable whether the leaders should step down after five years or not. I disagree with the claim because there are some fields that needs the same leader longer than five years such as some business companies, and disagree with the reason also because there are other surer path than the new leadership which may lead the enterprise success.
First, in business, leaders should stay in power more than five years. In case of the business, the policy of the company mainly depends on the thought of the leader. Granted, sometimes the change of the leader may bring the positive effect for the success of the company. However, in case of the IT companies such as Microsoft, Apple, and Facebook, they need to follow the offer of the market with alacrity, and this needs the preceded strong and united policy of the company. If they cannot follow the need of the market instantly yields by the change of the leader, they will be culled from the market. Therefore, business leaders should be continued more than five years.
In addition, there is other surer path to the success than the new leadership. Let’s take the example in education field. Previously, the education was only conducted in face to face. However, with development of the internet technology, online courses have been opened. With the handiness of the internet, the online course company such as Coursera is being very successful not due to its new leadership, but due to its novel market. Moreover, in case of the many successful start-up companies, the origin of there success comes from the novel and creative items, not from the new leadership. Even the leadership of some companies are weak because the leader of the start-up company is usually novice. Therefore, there are surer diverse factors for the success of the company than the new leadership.
In conclusion, for some fields, leaders had better to maintain their job more than five years, and even there are lots of surer paths to the success instead of the fresh leadership. For the success of the company, people should focus on not only the leadership, but also the other factors such as the changed market environment and the creativity of the work that they want to achieve.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 282, Rule ID: THERE_RE_MANY[3]
Message: Possible agreement error. Did you mean 'paths'?
Suggestion: paths
...ason also because there are other surer path than the new leadership which may lead ...
^^^^
Line 3, column 294, Rule ID: DT_PRP[1]
Message: Possible typo. Did you mean 'the' or 'IT'?
Suggestion: the; IT
...ess of the company. However, in case of the IT companies such as Microsoft, Apple, and...
^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, however, if, may, moreover, so, therefore, in addition, in conclusion, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 14.0 19.5258426966 72% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 10.0 12.4196629213 81% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 14.8657303371 67% => OK
Relative clauses : 3.0 11.3162921348 27% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 13.0 33.0505617978 39% => OK
Preposition: 53.0 58.6224719101 90% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 12.9106741573 39% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1853.0 2235.4752809 83% => OK
No of words: 378.0 442.535393258 85% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.90211640212 5.05705443957 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.40933352052 4.55969084622 97% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.44050164166 2.79657885939 87% => OK
Unique words: 168.0 215.323595506 78% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.444444444444 0.4932671777 90% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 573.3 704.065955056 81% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59117977528 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 6.24550561798 64% => OK
Article: 4.0 4.99550561798 80% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 3.10617977528 32% => OK
Conjunction: 6.0 1.77640449438 338% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 8.0 4.38483146067 182% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 20.2370786517 89% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 23.0359550562 91% => OK
Sentence length SD: 59.4311511616 60.3974514979 98% => OK
Chars per sentence: 102.944444444 118.986275619 87% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.0 23.4991977007 89% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.33333333333 5.21951772744 102% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 7.80617977528 26% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 10.2758426966 88% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 5.13820224719 19% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 8.0 4.83258426966 166% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.207138733009 0.243740707755 85% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0746119355154 0.0831039109588 90% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0584708192641 0.0758088955206 77% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.141424244079 0.150359130593 94% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0420155289568 0.0667264976115 63% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.1 14.1392134831 86% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 58.62 48.8420337079 120% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.92365168539 39% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.3 12.1743820225 85% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.14 12.1639044944 92% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.69 8.38706741573 92% => OK
difficult_words: 72.0 100.480337079 72% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 11.8971910112 88% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 11.2143820225 93% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.7820224719 93% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.