The luxuries and conveniences of contemporary life prevent people from developing into truly strong and independent individuals.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.
Today's technological advancements, especially home devices enhanced with artificial intelligence brought a great deal of convenience to our lives. For example, you can just yell "Alexa, please order pizza for me, the usual!" and your pizza will be at your door in approximately 30 minutes. Thanks to gadgets such as navigation, we no longer bother about going to somewhere we have no idea at all. Online reservations, smartphones, smartwatches, coffee machines which makes your coffee at the exact time you set it... these technologies not only save time for us but also takes a great deal of burden from our shoulders. However, does this situation results in less capacitated, less-rounded, dependent people who cannot deal with real-life problems without the help of a smart technology?
Ever since ancient times, we have been developing new technologies to make our lives easier. For instance, after the industrial revolution, the jobs that require a great deal of effort and with maximum repetitions during the day -such as putting a particular nail on a particular part of the car system approximately 1000 times a day and working for 10-12 hours- is no longer the duty of the human beings, but the duty of the machinery. As a result, did this convenience turned them into less developed, dependent individuals? I doubt that. More importantly, almost the same thing has been going on today. We no longer deal with picking up the phone to order a pizza. The machinery -the smart devices- do it for us. I definitely do not think that such accommodation deteriorates my capacities such as independence or smart thinking.
In case of luxuries, however, the case devolves into a more intrinsic one. In a psychoanalytic aspect, I believe that the author is right to some extent. For instance, according to Jacques Lacan, a human baby suffers from frustration during the ages between 1 and 5 because of his or her being incapable of doing anything. The baby is constantly jealous of other people around, who can actually feed themselves or play on their own. According to Lacan, this is the reason we incessantly desire for new and more luxurious things: To compensate for what we think that we lack, to better our fictive, social identities that we think are fragmented. 13-year-old cries for days for a fire engine machine, even though he has 10 other fire engines at home. An advertisement specialist yearns for a Mercedes 2018, even though he already owns a Mercedes 2016. The human beings' desire for the more luxurious, bigger, more ostentatious stuff never ceases to exist. Furthermore, the number of luxuries that we as human beings witness today are greater than ever before, our urge to get more turns into a more pathetic, desperate situation. For instance, 30 years ago, the cars you could get was limited. You could get a carriage, a Ford, or any other car in between. However, today, this range goes from cars that worth 500 dollars to a million, or even more! What I am trying to say is, at some point, I agree with the author, especially in psychoanalytic aspects. Since the luxuries and conveniences of life are greater than ever, the human beings have to compansate for their crippled identities with greater stuff, to which most of us have limited access to. Moreover, this pathetic and hopeless urge is, according to psychoanalytic experts, result in desperate humanbeings who are not happy with who they are and we see them especially in the realm of Instagram in which they portray themselves as richer, better, prettier and different personas.
As a result, the human mind's tendency to see money and luxuries as a device to complement the identity is an indispensable urge, according to psychoanalysts. Thus, as the luxuries given to us by the 21th-century world are greater than ever, the big gap between different hierarchal groups result in alienation in the unfortunate people and thus, might result in less developed human beings. However, I think this is not the case with conveniences. The new technologies that make our lives easier, in my humble opinion, are not as effective as to deteriorate our capabilities such as being independent or strong.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 472, Rule ID: DID_PAST[1]
Message: Did you mean 'turn'?
Suggestion: turn
...nery. As a result, did this convenience turned them into less developed, dependent ind...
^^^^^^
Line 9, column 24, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'minds'' or 'mind's'?
Suggestion: minds'; mind's
...nt personas. As a result, the human minds tendency to see money and luxuries as a...
^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, also, but, furthermore, however, if, moreover, so, thus, as to, for example, for instance, i think, such as, as a result
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 21.0 19.5258426966 108% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 12.4196629213 56% => OK
Conjunction : 19.0 14.8657303371 128% => OK
Relative clauses : 16.0 11.3162921348 141% => OK
Pronoun: 67.0 33.0505617978 203% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 87.0 58.6224719101 148% => OK
Nominalization: 16.0 12.9106741573 124% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 3502.0 2235.4752809 157% => OK
No of words: 698.0 442.535393258 158% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.01719197708 5.05705443957 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 5.1400087186 4.55969084622 113% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.96444476683 2.79657885939 106% => OK
Unique words: 356.0 215.323595506 165% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.510028653295 0.4932671777 103% => OK
syllable_count: 1094.4 704.065955056 155% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59117977528 101% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 15.0 6.24550561798 240% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 15.0 4.99550561798 300% => Less articles wanted as sentence beginning.
Subordination: 7.0 3.10617977528 225% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 4.0 1.77640449438 225% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 12.0 4.38483146067 274% => Less preposition wanted as sentence beginnings.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 32.0 20.2370786517 158% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 23.0359550562 91% => OK
Sentence length SD: 71.0444403173 60.3974514979 118% => OK
Chars per sentence: 109.4375 118.986275619 92% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.8125 23.4991977007 93% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.0625 5.21951772744 78% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 7.80617977528 26% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 13.0 10.2758426966 127% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 11.0 5.13820224719 214% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 8.0 4.83258426966 166% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.145879357671 0.243740707755 60% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0352075331108 0.0831039109588 42% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.029136838771 0.0758088955206 38% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0890869189052 0.150359130593 59% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0288497044821 0.0667264976115 43% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.1 14.1392134831 93% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 50.16 48.8420337079 103% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 12.1743820225 94% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.84 12.1639044944 97% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.37 8.38706741573 100% => OK
difficult_words: 163.0 100.480337079 162% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 12.0 11.8971910112 101% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 11.2143820225 93% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.7820224719 102% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Write the essay in 30 minutes.
Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.
Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.