People in this world depends on each other. Everything we do, we get is highly dependent on how we can collaborate with each other. From birth we are taught "Unity is Strength" and that formula or mantra applies in real life too. In every aspect, field and work place it does.
So, I agree with the given statement that youngsters should work in industry or different fields with the ability to collaborate with each other and work for well being of society.
As we had seen in past, when there is rivalry between people, it actually leads them to take worst decisions and not able to think it through. Collaboration teaches youngsters how to work with opponents and learn from them, it teaches how to make connections and make use of resources efficiently.
It is so true that every human being on earth depends on each other, so when it comes to business, industry or any other fields, why not to think of collaborating and grow with the help of people's support. When there is collaboration between two parties or let's say two people, they get to know about each others working strategies, approach towards life, how to tackle problems in the situation and move forward.
It is simple and cogent that people work in different kind of business and fields, so collaborating with each other would be beneficial for advancement of every sector and work in interdisciplinary approach.
On the contrary, it is understandable that rivalry brings zeal or passion to work and thrive for success, beacuse everone wants to grow. A healthy competetion is one of the factor of businesses and industries growing so rapidly and people working hard to get to the apex.
So, to sum up my position I do agree working in collaboartive manner makes possible certain things and it is good approach to learn from others, but at the same time when it comes about competeting, the extra energy people put in their work which actually level up the competetion and make people think about some extra innovative ideas to get ahead of their rivals.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 16, Rule ID: IN_PAST[1]
Message: Did you mean: 'in the past'?
Suggestion: in the past
...ell being of society. As we had seen in past, when there is rivalry between people, ...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 89, Rule ID: THE_SUPERLATIVE[2]
Message: A determiner is probably missing here: 'take the worst'.
Suggestion: take the worst
...tween people, it actually leads them to take worst decisions and not able to think it thro...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 258, Rule ID: LETS_LET[1]
Message: Did you mean 'Let's'?
Suggestion: Let's
...is collaboration between two parties or lets say two people, they get to know about ...
^^^^
Line 11, column 58, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...it is understandable that rivalry brings zeal or passion to work and thrive for s...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, but, if, so, well, as to, kind of, on the contrary, to sum up
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 13.0 19.5258426966 67% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 3.0 12.4196629213 24% => OK
Conjunction : 22.0 14.8657303371 148% => OK
Relative clauses : 10.0 11.3162921348 88% => OK
Pronoun: 29.0 33.0505617978 88% => OK
Preposition: 60.0 58.6224719101 102% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 12.9106741573 62% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1700.0 2235.4752809 76% => OK
No of words: 351.0 442.535393258 79% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.8433048433 5.05705443957 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.32839392791 4.55969084622 95% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.76074403305 2.79657885939 99% => OK
Unique words: 184.0 215.323595506 85% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.524216524217 0.4932671777 106% => OK
syllable_count: 517.5 704.065955056 74% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59117977528 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 6.24550561798 128% => OK
Article: 2.0 4.99550561798 40% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.10617977528 97% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.77640449438 113% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.38483146067 91% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 13.0 20.2370786517 64% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 27.0 23.0359550562 117% => OK
Sentence length SD: 81.0232635159 60.3974514979 134% => OK
Chars per sentence: 130.769230769 118.986275619 110% => OK
Words per sentence: 27.0 23.4991977007 115% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.46153846154 5.21951772744 105% => OK
Paragraphs: 7.0 4.97078651685 141% => Less paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 4.0 7.80617977528 51% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 10.2758426966 68% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 5.13820224719 19% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.83258426966 103% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.1117259733 0.243740707755 46% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0427830459192 0.0831039109588 51% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0330393019074 0.0758088955206 44% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0635136898583 0.150359130593 42% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0302303116869 0.0667264976115 45% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.9 14.1392134831 105% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 52.53 48.8420337079 108% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.6 12.1743820225 103% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.09 12.1639044944 91% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.26 8.38706741573 98% => OK
difficult_words: 73.0 100.480337079 73% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 11.8971910112 67% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.8 11.2143820225 114% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.7820224719 110% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Maximum six paragraphs wanted.
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.