The primary goal of technological advancement should be to increase people’s efficiency so that they have more leisure time
The issue can be divided into two parts viz. “Technological development” and “getting leisure time because of that”. Now, technological development can be considered as a good part for a growing economy but the part which follows might lead to many pros and cons. Usually, having a leisure time one might spend time with their loved one or might even invest time in society’s betterment but this might also lead a person to inculcate bad habits, will make him/her lazy. Moreover, the technology might overcome human intelligence. Also, it is not necessary that technology advancement should have increasing people’s leisure time as its primary goal. So, looking at various outcomes of the given issue I would like to say that technology advancement should not have increasing people’s efficiency to have more leisure time as its primary goal.
Technological advancement means to provide some better and efficient way to carry out an activity that a human might require much more efforts and time. So, if this human efforts or time are cut down then he might have leisure time but his ability to carry out certainly given task will be hampered and he would find shortcuts in his life. This as a whole point to that the human will become lazy. For example, if technology provides a device that will help people to bring a cup of tea from ground floor to the second floor then people would completely depend on that device and would never go 2 floors down to get a cup of tea. This tells us that along with being lazy, this would create chances of having physical issues and will degrade people’s physical ability.
Secondly, if people get leisure time it will place them in a situation of thinking about how to utilize the free time. So, a person can even inculcate bad habits in the complete course of time. For example, the person might start going to a casino. This will not only change his lifestyle but also can make him grumpy and change his behavior as a person.
Thus, technological advancement
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, if, look, moreover, second, secondly, so, then, thus, for example
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 6.0 19.5258426966 31% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 26.0 12.4196629213 209% => Less auxiliary verb wanted.
Conjunction : 14.0 14.8657303371 94% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 11.3162921348 80% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 31.0 33.0505617978 94% => OK
Preposition: 36.0 58.6224719101 61% => OK
Nominalization: 9.0 12.9106741573 70% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1698.0 2235.4752809 76% => OK
No of words: 346.0 442.535393258 78% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.90751445087 5.05705443957 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.31289638616 4.55969084622 95% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.83344323182 2.79657885939 101% => OK
Unique words: 178.0 215.323595506 83% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.514450867052 0.4932671777 104% => OK
syllable_count: 545.4 704.065955056 77% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59117977528 101% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 6.24550561798 80% => OK
Article: 4.0 4.99550561798 80% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.10617977528 97% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.77640449438 56% => OK
Preposition: 0.0 4.38483146067 0% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 20.2370786517 84% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 20.0 23.0359550562 87% => OK
Sentence length SD: 60.3001144794 60.3974514979 100% => OK
Chars per sentence: 99.8823529412 118.986275619 84% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.3529411765 23.4991977007 87% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.47058823529 5.21951772744 86% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 0.0 7.80617977528 0% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 10.2758426966 68% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 5.13820224719 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.83258426966 124% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.444913880283 0.243740707755 183% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.15464311148 0.0831039109588 186% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.171831842976 0.0758088955206 227% => The coherence between sentences is low.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.255788606595 0.150359130593 170% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.161262939975 0.0667264976115 242% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.9 14.1392134831 84% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 51.18 48.8420337079 105% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 12.1743820225 91% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.2 12.1639044944 92% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.64 8.38706741573 91% => OK
difficult_words: 66.0 100.480337079 66% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 11.8971910112 88% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 11.2143820225 89% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.7820224719 102% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.
Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.