Some people believe that increasing violence in the media is the cause of increasing violence in our society, especially among children. Others believe that children's peer groups and parental role models are a much more powerful influence on children's behavior.
There are a group of people who live in a society and maintain harmony with each other. The quality of being violent in a person is ambiguous. This could be related to how that person has been brought up or how much influenced he gets for his friends. It depends upon that person. Parents and friends play a vital role in any person’s psychology.
Firstly, parental role models have powerful influence on behavior to their children.They spent lot of time together and learn a lot of things within them. They live in mentality which accepts all the circumstances around them as truthful. Consider an example, early times, when a man used to his wife, it did not make a big deal and their son used to do the same in the future with their wife’s. This cycle had to stop by applying stringent rules to this preposterous behavior. However, considering the above example as rudimentary stage for a person to grow as violent man.
Secondly, people who we admire the most are also an influential factor for the increasing violence. People who are fond of movies and shows about violent crimes can make them do the same for getting their work done. Considering an example to bolster the violent crimes which are influenced by media. Movies like Godfather,Gangs of Wasseypur,etc are few examples. However it depends on person's interests concerning which newspaper to read and which channel to watch. So, if the media channels which provide and bolster violence elements are not available to individual's observation, then this person will not be influenced by violence.
To conclude, both factors are important for personal development and may either ameliorate or exacerbate it. Nevertheless, the influence of each factor depends on the extent to which this factor is inveigled in individual's life. Thereby, The children's peer groups and parental role models has more powerful influence on children's behavior as they accompany a colossal part of children's lives.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 13, Rule ID: THERE_RE_MANY[3]
Message: Possible agreement error. Did you mean 'groups'?
Suggestion: groups
There are a group of people who live in a society and mai...
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Line 3, column 85, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: They
...influence on behavior to their children.They spent lot of time together and learn a...
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Line 3, column 120, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...dren.They spent lot of time together and learn a lot of things within them. They ...
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Line 3, column 577, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ge for a person to grow as violent man. Secondly, people who we admire the most ...
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Line 5, column 322, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , Gangs
...fluenced by media. Movies like Godfather,Gangs of Wasseypur,etc are few examples. Howe...
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Line 5, column 341, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , etc
...Movies like Godfather,Gangs of Wasseypur,etc are few examples. However it depends on...
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Line 5, column 364, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: However,
...angs of Wasseypur,etc are few examples. However it depends on persons interests concern...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, first, firstly, however, if, may, nevertheless, second, secondly, so, then
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 13.0 19.5258426966 67% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 4.0 12.4196629213 32% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 14.8657303371 74% => OK
Relative clauses : 12.0 11.3162921348 106% => OK
Pronoun: 25.0 33.0505617978 76% => OK
Preposition: 47.0 58.6224719101 80% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 12.9106741573 62% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1649.0 2235.4752809 74% => OK
No of words: 325.0 442.535393258 73% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.07384615385 5.05705443957 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.24591054749 4.55969084622 93% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.81203499772 2.79657885939 101% => OK
Unique words: 187.0 215.323595506 87% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.575384615385 0.4932671777 117% => OK
syllable_count: 506.7 704.065955056 72% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59117977528 101% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 6.24550561798 96% => OK
Article: 3.0 4.99550561798 60% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.10617977528 64% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.77640449438 0% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.38483146067 68% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 20.2370786517 94% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 23.0359550562 74% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 37.4093919207 60.3974514979 62% => OK
Chars per sentence: 86.7894736842 118.986275619 73% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.1052631579 23.4991977007 73% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.21052631579 5.21951772744 81% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 7.0 7.80617977528 90% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 10.2758426966 97% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 5.13820224719 117% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.83258426966 62% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.197771088158 0.243740707755 81% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0534750961071 0.0831039109588 64% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0907449242416 0.0758088955206 120% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.121153148733 0.150359130593 81% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0681653411518 0.0667264976115 102% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.0 14.1392134831 78% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 54.22 48.8420337079 111% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.92365168539 39% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 12.1743820225 81% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.83 12.1639044944 97% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.51 8.38706741573 101% => OK
difficult_words: 83.0 100.480337079 83% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 6.5 11.8971910112 55% => Linsear_write_formula is low.
gunning_fog: 8.8 11.2143820225 78% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.7820224719 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.
Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.