Some people believe that increasing violence in the media is the cause of increasing violence in our society, especially among children. Others believe that children's peer groups and parental role models are a much more powerful influence on children's behavior.
Write a response in which you discuss which view more closely aligns with your own position and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should address both of the views presented above.
The claim posits increasing the viloence in the media is exacerbating the violence in the society and others believe that children's peer groups and parental role models are influencing the children's behaviour. Evolution of media industry comes with many advantages and disadvantages. Media plays a powerful influential role among the children. But if parents are stringent towards their children's upbringing then media can hardly influence the child. I believe children's peer groups and parental role models are a much more powerful influence on children's behaviour than the increase in violence in the media.
This generation is strongly attached to media; people spend a huge amount of time on technology. And young generation tends to live a solitary life, instead of cooperative life that the earlier generation experienced. Children, these days, are reliable on media for receiving news updates. Media can leave a huge impact, be it positive or be it devastating. Media has immense power to influence the new generation of the society. The callow generation may blindly follow with the aggressive acts shown on the media and thereby damaging the society's overall growth. Instead, society should positively leverage the power of media to create a innocuous and pacified environment.
But the media is not sole responsibility of the child's behaviour. In fact, media is hardly effective in building children's behaviour when the children's peer groups and parental role models comes into picture. Say for example, there is a lot of remonstrances shown on the media about a law passed in the society. Law can be anything like banning of cigarettes. In that case, media can depict that people are protesting against this law, because of which an aggressive child turn up to be violent. But if peer groups are at peace and the protests doesn't affect the behaviour, the child can lessen his/her want to join the protest. But if peer groups are highly affected with the ban, they can leave a huge negative impact on child's behaviour. Parental role models are also highly responsible for constructing children's behaviour; after all, a child is inspired by his/her parents.
Both media and children's peer groups and parental role models are collectively responsible for children's behaviour but we can say that the power of media can be undermined by the power of children's peer groups and parental role models. As shown using the example of the law passed to ban a cigarette, it is clear that peer groups and parental role models are more powerful than the media.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 638, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...y leverage the power of media to create a innocuous and pacified environment. Bu...
^
Line 3, column 545, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: doesn't
...er groups are at peace and the protests doesnt affect the behaviour, the child can les...
^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, if, may, so, then, after all, for example, in fact
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 22.0 19.5258426966 113% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 10.0 12.4196629213 81% => OK
Conjunction : 19.0 14.8657303371 128% => OK
Relative clauses : 8.0 11.3162921348 71% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 20.0 33.0505617978 61% => OK
Preposition: 46.0 58.6224719101 78% => OK
Nominalization: 13.0 12.9106741573 101% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2143.0 2235.4752809 96% => OK
No of words: 417.0 442.535393258 94% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.13908872902 5.05705443957 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.5189133491 4.55969084622 99% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.77601736165 2.79657885939 99% => OK
Unique words: 191.0 215.323595506 89% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.458033573141 0.4932671777 93% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 673.2 704.065955056 96% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59117977528 101% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 6.24550561798 80% => OK
Article: 4.0 4.99550561798 80% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.10617977528 97% => OK
Conjunction: 5.0 1.77640449438 281% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 5.0 4.38483146067 114% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 20.2370786517 109% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 23.0359550562 78% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 46.5118842007 60.3974514979 77% => OK
Chars per sentence: 97.4090909091 118.986275619 82% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.9545454545 23.4991977007 81% => OK
Discourse Markers: 2.77272727273 5.21951772744 53% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 7.80617977528 26% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 10.2758426966 97% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 5.13820224719 117% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.83258426966 124% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.448822786559 0.243740707755 184% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.15095747777 0.0831039109588 182% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.18171402104 0.0758088955206 240% => The coherence between sentences is low.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.321989175532 0.150359130593 214% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.204072538286 0.0667264976115 306% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.3 14.1392134831 87% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 53.21 48.8420337079 109% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.3 12.1743820225 85% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.53 12.1639044944 103% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.05 8.38706741573 96% => OK
difficult_words: 93.0 100.480337079 93% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 11.8971910112 67% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 11.2143820225 82% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.7820224719 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.