The main role of education is to prepare us for the future circumstances. Even though having even the most rudimentary knowledge of arts is enlightening, we must allow students to broaden their attention span to any subject they might find more intriguing.I shall elaborate my reason under two main points in paragraphs below.
Firstly,while I do believe broadening the span of studies is vital, I also believe expanding this endeavor only to liberal arts is still narrow-minded.Students must be encouraged yet be given the discretion of choosing courses that may well be unrelated to their field of study but still cover another facet of their interests like social sciences or other aspects of art like creative writing. As an example, many colleges and universities now require students to take elective to ensure no students gets too occupied by every day requirements of their course and would graduate their institution as a well informed individual not a walking-talking text book.
In addition, viewing other possible educational path way parallel to that of one's major field of study has made way for interdisciplinary studies. Now there are many courses available that combine disciplines that before were deemed incompatible like use of art in modern medicine.In fact I am also planning to study in a program that encompasses three major field of economy,sociology and politics because I believe modern world problem are so entangled that require specialists with flexibility in several field to find an inclusive answer without creating a newer debacle.
On the whole, I agree that a quality education must be more immersive than the established tortuous path of the same books and classes but the students must be given a choice whether they want to include arts or other topic in their curriculum or not.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 48, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...n role of education is to prepare us for the future circumstances. Even though ha...
^^
Line 1, column 258, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: I
...subject they might find more intriguing.I shall elaborate my reason under two mai...
^
Line 2, column 8, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , while
...ain points in paragraphs below. Firstly,while I do believe broadening the span of stu...
^^^^^^
Line 2, column 151, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Students
... to liberal arts is still narrow-minded.Students must be encouraged yet be given the dis...
^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 281, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: In
...ible like use of art in modern medicine.In fact I am also planning to study in a p...
^^
Line 3, column 359, Rule ID: CD_NN[1]
Message: Possible agreement error. The noun 'field' seems to be countable, so consider using: 'fields'.
Suggestion: fields
... a program that encompasses three major field of economy,sociology and politics becau...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 375, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , sociology
...encompasses three major field of economy,sociology and politics because I believe modern w...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 500, Rule ID: MANY_NN[1]
Message: Possible agreement error. The noun field seems to be countable; consider using: 'several fields'.
Suggestion: several fields
...require specialists with flexibility in several field to find an inclusive answer without cre...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, firstly, may, so, still, well, while, in addition, in fact, on the whole
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 12.0 19.5258426966 61% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 12.4196629213 64% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 14.8657303371 67% => OK
Relative clauses : 7.0 11.3162921348 62% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 25.0 33.0505617978 76% => OK
Preposition: 41.0 58.6224719101 70% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 12.9106741573 46% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1527.0 2235.4752809 68% => OK
No of words: 295.0 442.535393258 67% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.17627118644 5.05705443957 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.14434120667 4.55969084622 91% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.15735735813 2.79657885939 113% => OK
Unique words: 184.0 215.323595506 85% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.623728813559 0.4932671777 126% => OK
syllable_count: 495.9 704.065955056 70% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59117977528 107% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 6.24550561798 64% => OK
Article: 1.0 4.99550561798 20% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.10617977528 97% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.77640449438 0% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.38483146067 68% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 7.0 20.2370786517 35% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 42.0 23.0359550562 182% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 115.837148178 60.3974514979 192% => OK
Chars per sentence: 218.142857143 118.986275619 183% => OK
Words per sentence: 42.1428571429 23.4991977007 179% => OK
Discourse Markers: 12.8571428571 5.21951772744 246% => Less transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 8.0 7.80617977528 102% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 10.2758426966 49% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 0.0 5.13820224719 0% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.83258426966 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.170143179785 0.243740707755 70% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0696760837175 0.0831039109588 84% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0237068432555 0.0758088955206 31% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0928987048536 0.150359130593 62% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0226520499773 0.0667264976115 34% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 24.0 14.1392134831 170% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 20.39 48.8420337079 42% => Flesch_reading_ease is low.
smog_index: 13.0 7.92365168539 164% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 20.8 12.1743820225 171% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.65 12.1639044944 112% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 10.22 8.38706741573 122% => OK
difficult_words: 84.0 100.480337079 84% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 20.0 11.8971910112 168% => OK
gunning_fog: 18.8 11.2143820225 168% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.7820224719 110% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.