You work in an office where you sit and do your work the whole day You are worried about the effect of this on your health Write a letter to your manager In your letter Explain how sitting always is affecting your health Suggest changes the company can ma

Essay topics:

You work in an office where you sit and do your work the whole day. You are worried about the effect of this on your health.
Write a letter to your manager. In your letter
• Explain how sitting always is affecting your health
• Suggest changes the company can make to help you stay healthy
• Explain how these changes can help the company in future

Dear Sir,
I am writing this letter with regards to my recent health issues that has developed due to sitting for long hours.
I have been recently diagnosed with diabetes and increased level of cholesterol due to the nature of my work as a graphic designer. I am currently working for over 60 hours a week to support the marketing departments with designs.
My problem is with the new assistant head of marketing who isn’t clear in his communication briefs. He repeatedly changes the requirements which demands extended hours given our deliverables have tight deadlines. I suggest you to please address this problem immediately and ask for clearer communications to be given by Tuesdays. This will reduce my stress and sitting for longer hours and weekends, and I can commit to my yoga sessions after work.
This can help the company staff be more productive, motivated and commit to making ATC the best in the market in the future.
I request you to please provide the graphics team your support in this matter.
Yours sincerely,
Tolan S

Votes
Average: 7.8 (1 vote)

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 10, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
Dear Sir, I am writing this letter with regards to...
^^^
Line 2, column 116, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...eveloped due to sitting for long hours. I have been recently diagnosed with diab...
^^^
Line 7, column 17, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...pport in this matter. Yours sincerely, Tolan S
^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 4.0 7.48453608247 53% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 3.0 4.92783505155 61% => OK
Conjunction : 6.0 5.05154639175 119% => OK
Relative clauses : 3.0 3.03092783505 99% => OK
Pronoun: 24.0 32.9175257732 73% => OK
Preposition: 23.0 26.3917525773 87% => OK
Nominalization: 1.0 3.85567010309 26% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 875.0 937.175257732 93% => OK
No of words: 177.0 206.0 86% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.94350282486 4.54256449028 109% => OK
Fourth root words length: 3.64748333727 3.78020617076 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.77211782525 2.54303337028 109% => OK
Unique words: 116.0 127.690721649 91% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.655367231638 0.622605031667 105% => OK
syllable_count: 259.2 290.88556701 89% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.41237113402 106% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 10.0 9.13402061856 109% => OK
Article: 0.0 0.824742268041 0% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 1.83505154639 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 1.0 0.463917525773 216% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 0.0 1.44329896907 0% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 10.0 12.6804123711 79% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 17.0 16.3608247423 104% => OK
Sentence length SD: 29.6850130537 44.8134815571 66% => OK
Chars per sentence: 87.5 76.5299724578 114% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.7 16.8248392259 105% => OK
Discourse Markers: 0.0 4.34317383033 0% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.29896907216 116% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 2.54639175258 118% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 6.0 7.41237113402 81% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 1.49484536082 201% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 3.94845360825 25% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.213341133548 0.216113520407 99% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0861446588735 0.0766984524023 112% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0722219358585 0.0603063233224 120% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.10741743981 0.12726935374 84% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0625833563723 0.0580467560999 108% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.7 8.37731958763 128% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 62.68 70.7449484536 89% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 3.82989690722 230% => Smog_index is high.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.7 7.45979381443 117% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.08 8.71597938144 127% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.76 7.59969072165 115% => OK
difficult_words: 48.0 41.2886597938 116% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 8.62886597938 99% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.8 8.54432989691 103% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 8.15463917526 110% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 78.6516853933 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 7.0 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.