Some people think that parents should teach children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the place to learn this.Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Essay topics:

Some people think that parents should teach children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the place to learn this.
Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

The role of schools in educating and teaching children cannot be denied, yet parents contribution in bringing up of good community members is greater than any other party. This essay will discuss both ideas, giving examples to demonstrate issues and support arguments.

On the one hand, some people think that the education of young boys and girls about the deep moral values of the society should take place only in schools. The reason for that is the great variation between the conditions that available in each house and family, that makes bringing up of all children on the same values more difficult. In addition, general people are not experienced enough in teaching and treating children than the trained school teachers. For example, a study that has been conducted by Karachi University in Pakistan has shown that 95% of children learn better from their school’s teachers than anybody else. Thus they think schools are the best place to make good society members.

On the other hand, all of the children spend most of their preschool years with their parents only, and during this period they develop the largest portion of their personality. Furthermore, the most trusted persons for young individuals are their parents, and therefore they believe in what so ever they say to them. Therefore, parents effect on children personality and thoughts cannot be doubted, and thus they are responsible of bringing up of good members of the community.

To conclude, in spite of the presence of professionals in schools, parents should take the main role in educating children to be good society members.

Votes
Average: 6.7 (3 votes)

Comments

Sentence: The role of schools in educating and teaching children cannot be denied, yet parents contribution in bringing up of good community members is greater than any other party.
Description: A noun, plural, common is not usually followed by a noun, singular, common
Suggestion: Refer to parents and contribution

Sentence: Therefore, parents effect on children personality and thoughts cannot be doubted, and thus they are responsible of bringing up of good members of the community.
Description: A noun, plural, common is not usually followed by a noun, singular, common
Suggestion: Refer to parents and effect
Description: A noun, plural, common is not usually followed by a noun, singular, common
Suggestion: Refer to children and personality

between the conditions that available in each house and family
between the conditions that are available in each house and family

flaws:
No. of Words: 264 350

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Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.5 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 11 15
No. of Words: 264 350
No. of Characters: 1313 1500
No. of Different Words: 146 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.031 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.973 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.47 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 97 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 78 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 46 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 24 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 24 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.045 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.636 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.374 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.604 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.073 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5

- Are these sentences correct in these forms?
"The role of schools in educating and teaching children cannot be denied, yet parents contributions in bringing up of good community members is greater than any other party"

"Therefore, parents effects on children personalities and thoughts cannot be doubted, and thus they are responsible of bringing up of good members of the community"
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and if I avoided those mistakes could I get band 7 ?