Personal information of many individuals is held by large internet companies and organisations Do you think the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages

Essay topics:

Personal information of many individuals is held by large internet companies and organisations. Do you think the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

To keep abreast of the times, majority of giant internet cooperation and organizations has utilized individuals' private data these days. This issue is fraught with controversy, with the concern being expressed over the deleterious or even harmless implications of it. Yet to the best of my knowledge, this attempt does more harm than good and my reasons will be exclusively elucidated in this essay.
On the one hand, it should be first noted that if companies access the personal data of their users, not only can the better services be catered for consumers, but the corporations also can reap their benefits, especially monetary ones. Substantially, as long as individuals' information is accessible for companies, such as Facebook, their interests and behaviors are tracked and consequently, allow advertisers to target their audiences by sending ads to them and then pay pecuniary profits to the mentioned companies. Besides, several platforms, like Google map, are salient examples that make life more convenient without obvious destructive effects or pernicious intents.
Having said that, despite its possibly fruitful outcomes, there are negativities in this regard. Firstly, the possibility of fraud will increase if the amount of disseminated data boosts. Indeed, the more people register in such companies, the higher rate of defrauding and cyber-crimes such as cyber-bullying can be observed. Furthermore, having been spread the leaked documents of people's identities and details, individuals might have no clue why police approach them since they are the victim of hackers who implements their information for criminal purposes, or on a smaller scale, withdraw their bank accounts. Moreover, although a large number of companies make their utmost endeavor to build a strong firewall, hackers progress, break this and subsequently establish personal images, videos, messages, to mention a few, leading to disgrace and scandal, particularly for females.
In conclusion, concerning what ratiocinated above, I am deeply of the opinion that in spite of facilitating peoples' lives and making profits for companies, the Internet-based corporations holding private data are susceptible to be hacked and immense volume of users' din formation can be employed for delinquent aims, tremendously impacting people's lives.

Votes
Average: 8.9 (1 vote)

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 677, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...tructive effects or pernicious intents. Having said that, despite its possibly f...
^^^
Line 3, column 637, Rule ID: LARGE_NUMBER_OF[1]
Message: Specify a number, remove phrase, or simply use 'many' or 'numerous'
Suggestion: many; numerous
...their bank accounts. Moreover, although a large number of companies make their utmost endeavor to...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, besides, but, consequently, first, firstly, furthermore, if, moreover, so, then, in conclusion, such as, in spite of

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 15.0 13.1623246493 114% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 7.85571142285 102% => OK
Conjunction : 16.0 10.4138276553 154% => OK
Relative clauses : 5.0 7.30460921844 68% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 26.0 24.0651302605 108% => OK
Preposition: 39.0 41.998997996 93% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 8.3376753507 60% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1974.0 1615.20841683 122% => OK
No of words: 350.0 315.596192385 111% => OK
Chars per words: 5.64 5.12529762239 110% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.32530772707 4.20363070211 103% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.09017666756 2.80592935109 110% => OK
Unique words: 233.0 176.041082164 132% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.665714285714 0.561755894193 119% => OK
syllable_count: 610.2 506.74238477 120% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.60771543086 106% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 5.43587174349 92% => OK
Article: 4.0 2.52805611222 158% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 2.10420841683 95% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 0.809619238477 371% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 8.0 4.76152304609 168% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 12.0 16.0721442886 75% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 29.0 20.2975951904 143% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 84.7661816738 49.4020404114 172% => OK
Chars per sentence: 164.5 106.682146367 154% => OK
Words per sentence: 29.1666666667 20.7667163134 140% => OK
Discourse Markers: 10.1666666667 7.06120827912 144% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.01903807615 40% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 6.0 8.67935871743 69% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.9879759519 75% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 3.4128256513 88% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.105879258094 0.244688304435 43% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0367181561792 0.084324248473 44% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0286122208628 0.0667982634062 43% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0610338408869 0.151304729494 40% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0279239600983 0.056905535591 49% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 19.7 13.0946893788 150% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 33.58 50.2224549098 67% => OK
smog_index: 13.0 7.44779559118 175% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 15.8 11.3001002004 140% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 16.02 12.4159519038 129% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 11.12 8.58950901804 129% => OK
difficult_words: 134.0 78.4519038076 171% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 15.5 9.78957915832 158% => OK
gunning_fog: 13.6 10.1190380762 134% => OK
text_standard: 16.0 10.7795591182 148% => OK
What are above readability scores?

---------------------

Rates: 89.8876404494 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 8.0 Out of 9
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.