Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Famous entertainers and athletes deserve to have more privacy than they have now. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
I absolutely agree with that statement, and I think famous entertainers and athletes deserve to have more privacy that they have now. I hold this opinion because of several reasons. First, I think famous people need more privacy than they have now because they do not like other people interfere their personal affairs, and comment about their private issues. Second, famous people usually escape from crowded public places because they are disturbed by throngs of populations, who like to take a photographs or talk with famous people.
According to my point of view, famous athletes and actors and entertainers need more privacy than have now. In other words, they need calm and steady places to relax themselves and repulse their stress and anxiety, while, people sometimes annoy them by intervening their personal and private things. For instance, when a famous athlete share his photo on social media, people start to comment about that certain photo and often say something irreverent and impolite, which agitate those famous people. So, those prominent people usually prefer not to share their personal moments and beliefs in order to protect themselves against people's disruptive comments, and by doing that, they save their privacy. Also, I believe that people should allow eminent and famous people to be more convenient and relax when they are out of their home, and it seems to me that people should respect their privacy and do not bother them excessively.
Moreover, famous athletes and entertainers usually evade from exposing directly to people's eyes, because they do not want to stuck in heavy-populated places, where are repleted with their fans. For example, about three years ago we went to concert of Babak, my sister's favorite singer. My sister insisted to stay after concert in the auditorium till Babak comes and gives my sister a signature. Although my sister was extremely willing to see Babak, I was against to her view, because I believed that we should not bother Babak by taking photos and other things, instead, we should consider his privacy more than our personal desires.
Generally, I think famous people such as athletes and actors and actresses deserve more privacy than they have now.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 496, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[1]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'a photograph' or simply 'photographs'?
Suggestion: a photograph; photographs
...hrongs of populations, who like to take a photographs or talk with famous people. According ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, first, moreover, second, so, while, for example, for instance, i think, such as, in other words
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 6.0 15.1003584229 40% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 9.8082437276 71% => OK
Conjunction : 23.0 13.8261648746 166% => OK
Relative clauses : 12.0 11.0286738351 109% => OK
Pronoun: 54.0 43.0788530466 125% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 43.0 52.1666666667 82% => OK
Nominalization: 4.0 8.0752688172 50% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1863.0 1977.66487455 94% => OK
No of words: 363.0 407.700716846 89% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.13223140496 4.8611393121 106% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.3649236973 4.48103885553 97% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.42299617353 2.67179642975 91% => OK
Unique words: 183.0 212.727598566 86% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.504132231405 0.524837075471 96% => OK
syllable_count: 583.2 618.680645161 94% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 12.0 9.59856630824 125% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.86738351254 214% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 3.0 4.94265232975 61% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 14.0 20.6003584229 68% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 25.0 20.1344086022 124% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 55.0333850439 48.9658058833 112% => OK
Chars per sentence: 133.071428571 100.406767564 133% => OK
Words per sentence: 25.9285714286 20.6045352989 126% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.21428571429 5.45110844103 132% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.5376344086 18% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 11.8709677419 67% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88709677419 61% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.28378917395 0.236089414692 120% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.134646529938 0.076458572812 176% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.157939895387 0.0737576698707 214% => The coherence between sentences is low.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.232316348759 0.150856017488 154% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.116212323977 0.0645574589148 180% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.7 11.7677419355 133% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 46.1 58.1214874552 79% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.0 10.1575268817 128% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.77 10.9000537634 117% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.31 8.01818996416 104% => OK
difficult_words: 79.0 86.8835125448 91% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 10.002688172 110% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.0 10.0537634409 119% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 10.247311828 127% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 60.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 18.0 Out of 30
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.