Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Famous entertainers and athletes deserve to have more privacy than they have now. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
While many people believe that famous entertainers and athletes deserve to have more privacy, others disagree. In my opinion, entertainers and athletes do not deserve to have more privacy than they have now.
First of all, entertainers' personal lifestyles under the stage can be great models for teenagers or their fans to learn and imitate. Besides, lots of entertainers are famous for their personalities. Some of them are extremely kind and some of them are highly proactive. Most importantly, those personality traits are why people love them and why people decide to trace their private lives. For example, my favorite singer Jay often did charity work when he was not at work. He usually volunteered in the hospital, singing and comforting some heavily sick children. One day, a journalist revealed the stories about Jay's behaviors and how happy those children were. When the article came out, all of sudden, doing charities became a trend for every Jay's fan. Lots of his fans decided to go to clean the beaches or also volunteer in the hospitals. As a result, I can contend that when famous people's private life becomes public, there are so many benefits to whale societies.
In addition, athletes often use their influence to advocate some political values, so there is no reason their private lives can just keep private and no one can examine them. They should pay their privacy as the price for wanting to use their fame to achieve some advocacies. For instance, a baseball player named Chen in Taiwan liked to criticize the government's environmental policies. Therefore, many people who oppose his arguments decided to examine his private life in order to check was he really a trustworthy activist. It turned out he wasted lots of electricity that he almost opened the air conditioner 24 hours.
To conclude, I am a firm believer that famous entertainers do not deserve more privacy. Not only because their private lifestyles can be extraordinary models, but also because their private lives need to be examined.
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, besides, but, first, if, really, so, therefore, while, for example, for instance, in addition, as a result, first of all, in my opinion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 12.0 15.1003584229 79% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 9.8082437276 71% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 13.8261648746 80% => OK
Relative clauses : 8.0 11.0286738351 73% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 34.0 43.0788530466 79% => OK
Preposition: 33.0 52.1666666667 63% => OK
Nominalization: 3.0 8.0752688172 37% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1701.0 1977.66487455 86% => OK
No of words: 336.0 407.700716846 82% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.0625 4.8611393121 104% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.28139028586 4.48103885553 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.70848213877 2.67179642975 101% => OK
Unique words: 195.0 212.727598566 92% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.580357142857 0.524837075471 111% => OK
syllable_count: 560.7 618.680645161 91% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.51630824373 112% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 9.59856630824 73% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.51792114695 85% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.94265232975 61% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 20.6003584229 92% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 20.1344086022 84% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 25.8097664523 48.9658058833 53% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 89.5263157895 100.406767564 89% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.6842105263 20.6045352989 86% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.42105263158 5.45110844103 136% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 0.0 5.5376344086 0% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 11.8709677419 118% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.85842293907 104% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.88709677419 20% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.168962977518 0.236089414692 72% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0635337719647 0.076458572812 83% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.120592042087 0.0737576698707 163% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.158982093287 0.150856017488 105% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.171781333694 0.0645574589148 266% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.2 11.7677419355 95% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 45.76 58.1214874552 79% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 10.1575268817 109% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.77 10.9000537634 108% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.29 8.01818996416 103% => OK
difficult_words: 81.0 86.8835125448 93% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 7.5 10.002688172 75% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.8 10.0537634409 88% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 76.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 23.0 Out of 30
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.