Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
Mobile phones have given people more freedom.
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
It has been often suggested that mobile phones had offered people more liberation. However, I firmly disagree with this statement and argue that mobile phones take away our freedom to take a rest. The reasoning behind is that people can keep in touch with others via these phones whenever they want, even do not want and that addiction to mobile phones makes people restrainted and restricted.
To begin with, it seems that it is so hard to escape from mobile phones even when people want to avoid calling. Whether friends or colleagues might think that a person, whoever he or she is, can access a phone call and expect to be available at all times through their cell phones. Therefore, people have a difficult time spending their free time without interruptions. For instance, my sister, who works as a lawyer, always suffers phone calls from her clients even during her vacation. Most of the clients who call during the holiday consider that my sister will understand their serious situations and listen to their sayings. It seems quite difficult for her to have peaceful relaxation due to mobile phones.
Secondly, mobile phone addiction becomes a serious social issue, especially among kindergarteners nowadays. For my experience, it is quite easy to find that parents who try to placate their child by showing youtube thorough their phones in a café or a restaurant. Seriously, there are already many children who cannot concentrate and focus on something without the mobile phone, and this phenomenon would become worse as they grow older. What I mean is that, parents should set boundaries and limits of time of using mobile phones for their children at a young age, although they are not old enough to understand what their parents say. In this way, these future adults will gain more freedom from these mobile phones.
In conclusion, mobile phones force people to be constantly contacted others and be addicted to them which will lead to serious problem in our society. In this regard, I think mobile phones deprive people of freedom rather than give.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 4, Rule ID: ADVERB_WORD_ORDER[8]
Message: The adverb 'often' is usually put between 'has' and 'been'.
Suggestion: has often been
It has been often suggested that mobile phones had offere...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 395, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...akes people restrainted and restricted. To begin with, it seems that it is so ha...
^^^^^^^
Line 13, column 152, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_BEGINNING_RULE
Message: Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Reword the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
...lead to serious problem in our society. In this regard, I think mobile phones depr...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
however, if, second, secondly, so, therefore, for instance, i mean, i think, in conclusion, to begin with
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 11.0 15.1003584229 73% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 9.8082437276 92% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 13.8261648746 87% => OK
Relative clauses : 15.0 11.0286738351 136% => OK
Pronoun: 46.0 43.0788530466 107% => OK
Preposition: 42.0 52.1666666667 81% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 8.0752688172 99% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1735.0 1977.66487455 88% => OK
No of words: 346.0 407.700716846 85% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.01445086705 4.8611393121 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.31289638616 4.48103885553 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.48304080989 2.67179642975 93% => OK
Unique words: 195.0 212.727598566 92% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.563583815029 0.524837075471 107% => OK
syllable_count: 526.5 618.680645161 85% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 9.59856630824 83% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 3.51792114695 28% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.94265232975 81% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 16.0 20.6003584229 78% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 21.0 20.1344086022 104% => OK
Sentence length SD: 40.3678399224 48.9658058833 82% => OK
Chars per sentence: 108.4375 100.406767564 108% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.625 20.6045352989 105% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.5625 5.45110844103 120% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.5376344086 54% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 11.8709677419 67% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 3.85842293907 156% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.88709677419 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.239087938633 0.236089414692 101% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0871765191113 0.076458572812 114% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0596624357544 0.0737576698707 81% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.163503405056 0.150856017488 108% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0809380728924 0.0645574589148 125% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.0 11.7677419355 110% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 58.62 58.1214874552 101% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.3 10.1575268817 101% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.78 10.9000537634 108% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.87 8.01818996416 98% => OK
difficult_words: 70.0 86.8835125448 81% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 9.0 10.002688172 90% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 10.0537634409 103% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 10.247311828 98% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 76.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 23.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.