Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Most businesspeople are motivated only by the desire for more money.
The amount of money that someone can earn is one of the most important factors in our society. Genuinely, it determines our level of success. Although a plethora of people hold the opinion that human beings, especially businessmen, just work because of money, others disagree with this point of view and believe that they have other goals in their lives. I, to a great extent, hold this viewpoint that businesspeople are provoked by a variety of aims. Among countless reasons, which can vindicate my point of view, I will mention the two most conspicuous ones through the following paragraphs.
The first reason that juts out of my mind easily at the first moment of this issue is the fact that by doing so, they would feel internal satisfaction; therefore, they have a great deal of impetus to improve their business and work very hard. In other words, they will feel that they are useful in the society
The second and equally exquisite proof for this assertion is about this importance that businessmen really want to introduce individuals new technology. They are always looking for new way to enhance the level of people’s lives by providing an excellent access for them to the new products. Actually, they are the pillars and the power that guide our nation toward progress. To give a tangible example, a research conducted by some scientists in my country has shown that almost all persons who do business activities, make attempts to bring new technology into their nation. As it is clear, they have undeniable roll in our society.
To make a long story short, based on the aforementioned arguments, we may draw the conclusion that money is not the only motivator for the businesspeople. This contention is due to the fact that
Grammar and spelling errors:
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Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...feel that they are useful in the society The second and equally exquisite proof f...
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Line 4, column 247, Rule ID: A_UNCOUNTABLE[3]
Message: Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply 'excellent access'.
Suggestion: excellent access
...vel of people's lives by providing an excellent access for them to the new products. Actually,...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 194, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... This contention is due to the fact that
^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, first, look, may, really, second, so, therefore, in other words, to a great extent
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 10.0 15.1003584229 66% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 6.0 9.8082437276 61% => OK
Conjunction : 4.0 13.8261648746 29% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 14.0 11.0286738351 127% => OK
Pronoun: 41.0 43.0788530466 95% => OK
Preposition: 39.0 52.1666666667 75% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 8.0752688172 74% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1452.0 1977.66487455 73% => OK
No of words: 296.0 407.700716846 73% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.90540540541 4.8611393121 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.14784890444 4.48103885553 93% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.74915319986 2.67179642975 103% => OK
Unique words: 179.0 212.727598566 84% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.60472972973 0.524837075471 115% => OK
syllable_count: 443.7 618.680645161 72% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 10.0 9.59856630824 104% => OK
Article: 4.0 3.08781362007 130% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.51792114695 57% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 13.0 20.6003584229 63% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 22.0 20.1344086022 109% => OK
Sentence length SD: 67.2927016274 48.9658058833 137% => OK
Chars per sentence: 111.692307692 100.406767564 111% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.7692307692 20.6045352989 111% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.07692307692 5.45110844103 130% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.5376344086 54% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 11.8709677419 76% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.85842293907 52% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.88709677419 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.139040359458 0.236089414692 59% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0429762750336 0.076458572812 56% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0427460305319 0.0737576698707 58% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0829037805489 0.150856017488 55% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0488903158836 0.0645574589148 76% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.1 11.7677419355 111% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 57.61 58.1214874552 99% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 10.1575268817 105% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.49 10.9000537634 105% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.52 8.01818996416 106% => OK
difficult_words: 71.0 86.8835125448 82% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 10.002688172 110% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 10.0537634409 107% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.247311828 107% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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We are expecting: No. of Words: 350 while No. of Different Words: 200
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 76.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 23.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.